there's just no one that gets me like you do...
I feel so totally random tonight...
i wanted to go to the mall and liquid tonight like we all had planned but... yea didn't happen... anyways... HAPPY BIRTHDAY SUBREEN!
I've been thinking about a lot of stuff and trying to get ready for school. I loooove it when school's just starting because it's like you get a clean slate and a chance to start over so i can't wait and i'm actually excited about school for once! cait came over today for a while and we hung out. tomorrow i'm gonna go get my nails and hair done prob, hang w/ the shanster and then go to that surprise party for chase (chase, i know you're gonna read this in a few days and i know i promised i would meet you at the airport but your mom doesn't want me to... she thinks it'd be better to just surprise you later that night so don't get pissed at me) yesterday i hung out w/ mele and she's awesome we have a lot in common and we had a lot of fun. we felt like such dorks but we all went and saw princess diaries 2 haha.
with my random thinking and b/c of some movies i've seen lately i've FINALLY come to the realization that: I DON'T NEED A GUY TO MAKE ME HAPPY! and that the girl doesn't have to end up with the guy to still have a happy ending. if i wanna be happy it's totally up to me and i can't depend on other ppl to make me happy. so i'm happy for now (DON'T RUIN IT)
also i've been thinkin about how if a guy doesn't want to date a girl or he rejects her in some way she overanalyzes herself and tears herself apart thinking "what did I do wrong? what's wrong w/ ME?" guys on the other hand usually are just like "she doesn't want me... what a bitch i can do better" so yea one of the big differences between girls and guys. Just thought i'd let some of you guys know what you do to us...
and i've also had to realize who my true friends really are... and who i can trust and who i can't but at least i've found all of it out now rather than get hurt more later on...and sometimes i wish i could be more trusting in people and have a little more faith in them... then something happens and i'm so grateful that i didn't trust them.
yea... so much for "Best Friends"
Well I can't regret,
can't you just forget it?
I started something I couldn't finish
And if we go down,
we go down together
best friends means,
well best friends means
And I've got a twenty-dollar bill
that says you're up late night starting
fist fights versus fences in your backyard
Wearing your black eye like a badge of honor
Soaking in sympathy
from friends who never loved you
nearly half as much as me
Best friends means I pulled the trigger
Best friends means you get what you deserve
I gave up on you a long time ago
How can you blame me?
You've been there for me one time in my life
But it didn't matter
You came and went so fast all my hope
And faith in you shattered
And now here I sit alone in this room
No one to confide in
You watched all my dreams come apart at the seams
some random lyrics about stuff on my mind:
guess it’s luck, but it’s the same Hard luck, you’ve been trying to tame Maybe it’s love, but it’s like you said “Love is like a role that we play.” But, I believe in you so much I could die for the words that you say But, you’re chasin’ the ghost of a good thing Haunting yourself as the real thing It’s getting away from you again While you’re chasin’ ghosts
I CANT BELIVE I BELIEVED EVERYTHING WE HAD WOULD LAST SO YOUNG AND NAIVE FOR ME TO THINK SILLY OF ME TO DREAM OF ONE DAY HAVING YOUR KIDS LOVE IS SO BLIND IT FEELS RIGHT WHEN ITS WRONG I CANT BELIEVE I FELL FOR YOUR SCHEMES I'M SMARTER THAN THAT SO DUMB AND NAIVE TO BELIEVE THAT WITH ME YOU'RE A CHANGED MAN IT TOOK ME SOME TIME BUT NOW I'VE MOVED ON, BECAUSE I REALIZED I GOT… ME, MYSELF AND I THAT'S ALL I GOT IN THE END THAT'S WHAT I FOUND OUT AND IT AINT NO NEED TO CRY I TOOK A VOW THAT FROM NOW ON I'M GONNA BE MY OWN BEST FRIEND EVEN YOUR VERY BEST FRIEND TRIED TO WARN ME ON THE LOW IT TOOK ME SOME TIME BUT NOW I AM STRONG, BECAUSE I REALIED I’VE GOT…… I GOT ME, MYSELF AND I I KNOW THAT I WILL NEVER DISAPOINT MYSELF My eyes HAVE CRIED A THOUSAND TIMES I CAN'T REGRET TIME SPENT WITH YOU YEAH YOU HURT ME BUT I LEARNED A LOT ALONG THE WAY IT’S HOW I LEARNED TO MAKE IT THROUGH AFTER ALL THE RAIN YOU SEE THE SUN COME OUT AGAIN I CAN SEE THE SUN SHINE I’VE GOT ME, MYSELF AND I
I plea insanity Cause I can't leave but I can't stay You say, won't you come find me and yes is what I say You don't bring me anything but down You don't bring me anything but down Everything is crashing to the ground Maybe I'm not your perfect kind Maybe I'm not what you had in mind Maybe we're just killing time You with your silky words And your eyes of green and blue You with your steel beliefs That don't match anything you do No more playing seek and hide No more long and wasted nights Can't you make it easy on yourself I know you wish you were strong You wish you were never wrong Well, I got some wishes of my own
you lay down with angels To feel yourself again you've got everything you need Under your thick skin I know where you're going I know where you've been When it comes to playin games you will always win C'mon c'mon c'mon Break my heart again For old times sake you can't see your shadow Reaching for the sky Lay your head down on my bed Please don't ask me why Why am I leaving Why don't I know Something deep inside me Is forcing me to go you say you need me But you can't tell me no When I ask you to stop me baby you just let me go you took the best of me & threw it away Too bad the rest of me Still wants you to stay
I feel like cherry wine Like Valentines Like a Spring is coming & everything is all right I've got a love that's new I hear you're happy too That's the way it should be But lately I feel like crying I wanna get over you But you're everywhere & I just can't get away I gotta get over you Cuz it's just not fair That I still see your face I heard your name today I walked away Cuz everyone's still talking I don't need that in my life Got better things to do Than worry about you I'm gonna keep on walking But sometimes I don't know why Well we had a good time But time goes on You didn't really want me until I was gone I wanna get over you Before you get over me Over me
go on, your cruel intentions won't solve your problems, everyone's gotta get bottomed out in the long run and those are the times you need love
desperado why dont you come to your senses you been out ridin fences for so long now oh you're a hard one i know that you got your reasons these things that are pleasin you can hurt you somehow dont you draw the queen of diamonds boy she'll beat you if shes able you know the queen of hearts is always your best bet now it seems to me some fine things have been laid upon your table but you only want the ones that you cant get desperado you aint gettin any younger your pain & your hunger they're drivin you home & freedom well thats just some people talkin your prison is walkin through this world all alone you're loosin all your highs & lows aint it funny how the feeling goes away desperado why dont you come to your senses come down from your fences open the gate it may be rainin but theres a rainbow above you you better let somebody love you before its too late
this might just be a waste of time but there's no one i'd rather waste my time with than all of my best friends so start the car up, we'll all take turns but not for the worst we're all "hasbeens" and "never-were's" and we're all in the back singing "Roxanne" just watching life pass us by pass us by as if we cared, enough to try and catch up enough to make up for lost time we've been down,we've been out, we've been hanging 'round tip our glasses to having no direction start the van, get me out of this one horse town, waste this night
u can tell me the world is round and 'll prove to u its square u can keep ur feet on the ground but Ill be walking on air ur pretty good at waiting While I go running around Well thats just the way it is u know I got a hole in my pocket u give me love & I drop it I guess I threw it away We stick together with every day that passes by But Im just like the weather I keep on changing my mind Well u can hardly believe it Every time I turn & say well Good morning Im leaving & Ill be back in a few days But thats just the way it is u know I got a four leaf clover Ill throw it over my shoulder im gonna need it someday i try to be where u are i try to be on time but i lose my way
Bat your eyes girl Be otherworldly Count your blessings Seduce a stranger What's so wrong with being happy Kudos to those who see through sickness I suggest we learn to love ourselves before it's made illegal Those left standing will make millions Writing books on the way it should have been When she woke in the morning She knew that her life had passed her by And she called out a warning Don't ever let life pass you by
I guess its all how you look at it You might see more than the side that your seeing Turn it upside down and shake it up a bit It could be a good thing Its all how you look at it You've got your opinions and I've got mine Can we agree to agree at some of the time? A glass half empty is a glass half full And thats what makes life beautiful I guess Its all how you look at it You might see more than the side that your seeing Turn it upside down and shake it up a bit It could be a good thing Its all how you look at it
I'm not looking for a warm embrace I'm not looking For a friendly face I've got Everything I need Im not worried If you're coming back Im in a hurry Cuz I just found out I've got Everything I need So even if you wanted to you cant save me you cant fail me Im back up on my feet baby In the way down Is when I found out That I got everything I need Im not looking for a hand to hold Im not waiting for someone to show I never found a wall I couldnt climb I never seen a well As deep as mine It doesnt matter If Im qualified Or if I ever learnTo blow your mind Ive got Everything I need Im not looking for a place to shine I wake up & Im satisfied Ive got Everything I need
I've been waiting all my life To finally find you Just so i can push you away And when youre crawlin on broken glass to get to me That's when i'll let you stay
If I could tell the world just one thing It would be that we're all OK & not to worry 'cause worry is wasteful & useless in times like these I won't be made useless I won't be idle with despair I will gather myself around my faith For light does the darkness most fear & I am never broken & heartache came to visit me But I knew it wasn't ever after We'll fight, not out of spite For someone must stand up for what's right In the end only kindness matters
Look at me my depth perception must be off again Cuz this hurts deeper than I thought it did It has not healed with time it just shot down my spine reminds me how you laid us down & gently smiled before you destroyed my life Would you find it in your heart To make this go away And let me rest in p i e c e s Would you find it in your heart? To make this go away And let me rest in p i e c e s Look at me my depth perception must be off again You got much closer than I thought you did I am in your reach You held me in your hands would you find it in your heart to make this go away & let me rest in p i e c e s
sick & tired of this world theres no more air trippin over myself goin nowhere waiting, suffocating no direction & i took a dive & on the way down i saw you & you saved me from myself & i won't forget the way you loved me on the way down almost fell right through but i held onto you i was so afraid of goin under but now the weight of the world feels like nothing waiting to breathe its alright sunlight on my face i wake up & yea i'm alive & i won't forget the way you loved me
things are gonna be really different next year... can't WAIT i need a change!
<3
leave me some love...