The Good and the Bad...this is the bad
This will be a two part entry. This one will be LJ friends only and the other will be public because there is some stuff that I don’t want the whole world to know. And I know it’s weird because I will talk about anything but as of last night I will know longer do that nor will I be anybodies plaything thing or time killer anymore. WOOT WOOT it happened again.
It has become very clear to me that I was just a time killer with Jeff. Things were going really well and then all of a sudden he dumps me and still to this day I have no idea why. Must be nice to just treat someone like shit and then not have to see how you made them feel. I tried to tell him but he won’t listen. It really sucks when you let yourself care for someone and end up just getting used abused and put back wet. Let’s see there were Matt, Eric, and Jeff.
So I decided that I would give it one more shot…what have I god to lose other than my self respect and my dignity. Yeah so I just made an ass of myself. I told this guy Kevin that I really liked him and it didn’t go so well. He said that he knew and didn’t feel the same and I can understand that it’s good that I know. And I really don’t mind. What really pissed me off is that he asked to go to this club with him last night because he friend Cory and her date was going and he didn’t want to be third wheel so I said OK why not. Well that was a big mistake. He ended up running into his 28 year old ex there an I got totally ditched; thank god for my best friend Kevin came or I would have been there doing nothing. I haven‘t told him that but that was really shady to do.
So I have also come to the conclusion that I am going to go back to the way that I used to be and just be what ever body thinks of me. There are jokes all the time about me being a slut and a whore so why not give them a reason to think that. I was happier then and I got what I wanted and never had to get attached. It was much easier. Although my other problem is that I always care about what other people want and not what I want and it’s really getting old and I hate it.
Ok now for the good part…leave me some love
It has become very clear to me that I was just a time killer with Jeff. Things were going really well and then all of a sudden he dumps me and still to this day I have no idea why. Must be nice to just treat someone like shit and then not have to see how you made them feel. I tried to tell him but he won’t listen. It really sucks when you let yourself care for someone and end up just getting used abused and put back wet. Let’s see there were Matt, Eric, and Jeff.
So I decided that I would give it one more shot…what have I god to lose other than my self respect and my dignity. Yeah so I just made an ass of myself. I told this guy Kevin that I really liked him and it didn’t go so well. He said that he knew and didn’t feel the same and I can understand that it’s good that I know. And I really don’t mind. What really pissed me off is that he asked to go to this club with him last night because he friend Cory and her date was going and he didn’t want to be third wheel so I said OK why not. Well that was a big mistake. He ended up running into his 28 year old ex there an I got totally ditched; thank god for my best friend Kevin came or I would have been there doing nothing. I haven‘t told him that but that was really shady to do.
So I have also come to the conclusion that I am going to go back to the way that I used to be and just be what ever body thinks of me. There are jokes all the time about me being a slut and a whore so why not give them a reason to think that. I was happier then and I got what I wanted and never had to get attached. It was much easier. Although my other problem is that I always care about what other people want and not what I want and it’s really getting old and I hate it.
Ok now for the good part…leave me some love