(no subject)
rant begins part1]guess where I am ? that's right . work . so this work thing , I loved it at first but now I have a boss that just is sitting on my neck & you know this people that will always , always show they are better then you & act like b*t*h***... to move up on your account ? you know it , that's my new boss . it's not that I care . I already got bored with this work , I'm a person that needs a lot of changes in order to stay interested & now I'm just not into my work as I was ...I need me a new excitement. [ends part1]
[start part2] I went to a vacation with this guy I dated. now He's nice & all but I really don't know how on earth I always get insecure . I know I'm good for this guy , condescending as it may sound but He got good ( even though girls lure themselves over him ...*rolleyes* ) , & I felt at first He loves me . for reals . but then It starts. the scared old me that I'm not pretty enough or "smart" enough ..& it's not smart-smart cause that I know I am , but if you ask me how to seduce a guy , I come nothing to the next bimbo in line ... she would eat me alive . I hate that about me cause I want to be able to have this street wise girls have , but I'm just me . same old too smart-for my own good, goody tissue . & I can't believe I write this even . maybe that's the problem , I can't accept that this world is based on such superficial, shallow values I fall short in . I am used to always ask of myself to be the best , always 100% & I can't be at this because there are others who will always be more beautiful , smart or happy . I need to just accept myself . I want that to myself. that would be my gift this year to myself. [end rant] .
[start part2] I went to a vacation with this guy I dated. now He's nice & all but I really don't know how on earth I always get insecure . I know I'm good for this guy , condescending as it may sound but He got good ( even though girls lure themselves over him ...*rolleyes* ) , & I felt at first He loves me . for reals . but then It starts. the scared old me that I'm not pretty enough or "smart" enough ..& it's not smart-smart cause that I know I am , but if you ask me how to seduce a guy , I come nothing to the next bimbo in line ... she would eat me alive . I hate that about me cause I want to be able to have this street wise girls have , but I'm just me . same old too smart-for my own good, goody tissue . & I can't believe I write this even . maybe that's the problem , I can't accept that this world is based on such superficial, shallow values I fall short in . I am used to always ask of myself to be the best , always 100% & I can't be at this because there are others who will always be more beautiful , smart or happy . I need to just accept myself . I want that to myself. that would be my gift this year to myself. [end rant] .