(no subject)
Today on tv:
If you didn't see it coming, you weren't paying attention
Some days, that is so true. We can be very blind to the obvious things. Or maybe we're underestimating whatever it is.
I saw my spiritual director today. She talks to me about God and my spirituality, and sometimes is able to put things into the right context for me. Now that I think about it, Marlena may have been able to do the same thing. The problem there was that because she didn't understand it, she wasn't able to guide me. I hope that she's able to separate the two, because I think she has it in her to connect with others better.
Now back to me!
I've been discouraged by the fact that when it comes to religion, I consider myself Jewish by heritage, by culture, by ancestry, but not by faith. When it comes to God, my conscious thought is of some force that kicked off the big bang, that the odds of everything coming together to make things the way they are, needed to come together. But that's the extent of it. I don't believe in miracles and I don't believe that God gives you want you want ... or what you need for that matter. I don't believe in getting angry with God when things are bad, or being grateful to God when things go well.
And then of course there are many nights that I feel like praying anyways. In general, I try to thank God for getting me through the day. I may ask for things I want or things I need. I may ask God to help people I know who are in some sort of distress. And that satisfies my feeling about wanting to pray. I don't do it with the sense that praying will actually make things happen. For me, praying is a way of trying to accept the things that I cannot control and to appreciate the good things from my life.
So while that dichotomy, that contradiction, makes me feel weird when I put those side by side, I am ok with it and I don't feel the need to try to understand why I am like that right now.
If you didn't see it coming, you weren't paying attention
Some days, that is so true. We can be very blind to the obvious things. Or maybe we're underestimating whatever it is.
I saw my spiritual director today. She talks to me about God and my spirituality, and sometimes is able to put things into the right context for me. Now that I think about it, Marlena may have been able to do the same thing. The problem there was that because she didn't understand it, she wasn't able to guide me. I hope that she's able to separate the two, because I think she has it in her to connect with others better.
Now back to me!
I've been discouraged by the fact that when it comes to religion, I consider myself Jewish by heritage, by culture, by ancestry, but not by faith. When it comes to God, my conscious thought is of some force that kicked off the big bang, that the odds of everything coming together to make things the way they are, needed to come together. But that's the extent of it. I don't believe in miracles and I don't believe that God gives you want you want ... or what you need for that matter. I don't believe in getting angry with God when things are bad, or being grateful to God when things go well.
And then of course there are many nights that I feel like praying anyways. In general, I try to thank God for getting me through the day. I may ask for things I want or things I need. I may ask God to help people I know who are in some sort of distress. And that satisfies my feeling about wanting to pray. I don't do it with the sense that praying will actually make things happen. For me, praying is a way of trying to accept the things that I cannot control and to appreciate the good things from my life.
So while that dichotomy, that contradiction, makes me feel weird when I put those side by side, I am ok with it and I don't feel the need to try to understand why I am like that right now.