Mood Swing
I really feel like I need to talk to my Dad about my depression lately.
It is severely hindering my normal sociality and it's starting to make me physically and emotionally sick.
Am I childish to get so depressed so easily for No apparetn reason?
I mean, one minute, I'm fine, havin' fun... and the next I want to vomit and cry.
It's really not like em at all.
I really do want a boyfriend but I don't understand why it's getting me so upset.
It's not like I've even made an effort to get one.
And furthermore, I know it will take a while for me to find someone I want to be with.
So, if I understand this hard to deal with but totally reasonable concept...
Why am I still feeling this way?
I have such and off time sleep cycle, I went to sleep at 4:30 and woke up at 2.
That is not acceptable, even to me.
There are so many Gay people in this county.
So many people who have the balls to put there face on a website, but not have an open relationship because they are afraid of the consequences.
I was afraid once.
Now I see why it got Brandon so jittery.
I want to say to some people I see in , say, Wal-Mart that I see online... Hey Your That Guy From Glimse or whatever....
but I have this stupid thing called a soul that kicks me in the nuts when I think about doing something evil.
yeah, that sucks.
And Ya know... with all the openly gay people online, you'd think I could find one who's cute nice who lies me and I could actually find.
And they wouldn't lie and they would be a GUY not a SHE-MAN and be cool and evrything I want and I'd be what they were looking for and we'd be really FUCKING HAPPY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
But no... I had to be born and raised in the MOST CONSERVATIVE, OLD-FOLK RIDDEN PEICE OF SHIT TOWN God COULD CONJURE UP.
No don't put me in San-Francisco
Don't put me in L.A.
PUT ME IN INVERNESS FLORIDA.
BECAUSE EVERY KID WANTS TO GROW UP HERE~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Why did everything in my life have to turn out this way... and why did it turn out what seems to be better for other people...
Why do I get the emotional problem that makes me puke?
And why can't I be motivated to better myself?
Man, I am really depressed... I want some Lexapro... or sex, whatev.
It is severely hindering my normal sociality and it's starting to make me physically and emotionally sick.
Am I childish to get so depressed so easily for No apparetn reason?
I mean, one minute, I'm fine, havin' fun... and the next I want to vomit and cry.
It's really not like em at all.
I really do want a boyfriend but I don't understand why it's getting me so upset.
It's not like I've even made an effort to get one.
And furthermore, I know it will take a while for me to find someone I want to be with.
So, if I understand this hard to deal with but totally reasonable concept...
Why am I still feeling this way?
I have such and off time sleep cycle, I went to sleep at 4:30 and woke up at 2.
That is not acceptable, even to me.
There are so many Gay people in this county.
So many people who have the balls to put there face on a website, but not have an open relationship because they are afraid of the consequences.
I was afraid once.
Now I see why it got Brandon so jittery.
I want to say to some people I see in , say, Wal-Mart that I see online... Hey Your That Guy From Glimse or whatever....
but I have this stupid thing called a soul that kicks me in the nuts when I think about doing something evil.
yeah, that sucks.
And Ya know... with all the openly gay people online, you'd think I could find one who's cute nice who lies me and I could actually find.
And they wouldn't lie and they would be a GUY not a SHE-MAN and be cool and evrything I want and I'd be what they were looking for and we'd be really FUCKING HAPPY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
But no... I had to be born and raised in the MOST CONSERVATIVE, OLD-FOLK RIDDEN PEICE OF SHIT TOWN God COULD CONJURE UP.
No don't put me in San-Francisco
Don't put me in L.A.
PUT ME IN INVERNESS FLORIDA.
BECAUSE EVERY KID WANTS TO GROW UP HERE~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Why did everything in my life have to turn out this way... and why did it turn out what seems to be better for other people...
Why do I get the emotional problem that makes me puke?
And why can't I be motivated to better myself?
Man, I am really depressed... I want some Lexapro... or sex, whatev.