(no subject)

[horselover101]

So I had a "discussion" with his parents and him last night, and apparently it's all my fault that I don't feel welcome in their home, and I'm so disrespectful of them. They want me to work on being involved in the family more, and that it's my fault because wen I go over there I just go down stairs (which is not true, I'm happy to talk to his mom, she just never seems to want to talk to me unless it's to criticize Peter) and she's very offended because I'm not making more of an effort to be personable to them. It's all my fault that we don't have a better relationship. I'm too demanding of them because I think everything has to go the way I want it to. I was a guest in their home and apparently attacked them.... see where this is going? yeah, everything I said was turned against me. I started crying when they wouldn't listen and turned everything into my fault. "we had a good relationship with our parents and our in law's, I just can't believe that you wouldn't want that too" and I do, but not if they're going to constantly criticize me and Peter every time I go over there. There's a reason I don't feel welcome, and it's because everything I say gets turned into something it's not. We try to have a conversation just him and I, and they butt in like it's thier business. Yes, they raised some valid points, and yes, Peter and I need to sit down and talk about things, but now that it's been decided to take some action, move on. They kept going over the same thing again and again and I asked them if we could move on and they got all offended because I asked them if it would be ok if we discussed it between the two of us and then asked them if we needed help. I think that's how it should be, isn't it? talk about things amongst yourselves and then when you need help or advice, ask for it???? or do I as his mother said "have a distorted psychotic view of how things are"? That's right, they called me psychotic because I wanted to work these things out before we discussed them further in front of his parents, and because I got "over dramatic and emotional" after they went after me. I am trying to understand them, enlightenment please? I want to get along with them I really do. I've never had these kind of problems with my own parents, so any suggestions on how to deal with them would be greatly appreciated.

Sorry it's so long, I can't figure out the stupid cut thing