(no subject)
Things are going pretty well for me.
At the end of the day what I can say is that my spirits are pretty high. I'm currently in California. I've been in this suburb hellhole for 1.5 weeks so far, and I'll have to be here another 2-3 weeks. I wake up everyday at 4:30-5:00 AM and work anywhere from 10-16 hours. I literally don't remember my last day off.
In the evenings the hours creep on and I always have a severe aversion to sleep. Every night I stay up too late. I think I have a psychological block that keeps me from just laying down and going to sleep. I never sleep without crashing - without physically not being able to stay awake. It's a pretty decently sized problem for me. What bothers me most is that for some reason I'm not able to convince myself that it's acceptable to go to sleep.
I feel very fortunate with my career. I'm currently making 2.5 times as much as I was 1.5 years ago, and this is satisfying. My boss wants me to run the engineering department at the office. This is a pretty big deal to me.
I'm pretty sure I have an addiction to moving forward. Stagnation is death. Unless I am actively progressing in some part of my life I fall into depression. Despite how good my job is, if I felt like I wasn't moving forward for too long I'd probably quit - for anything else.
One of my coworkers got fired today. It's challenging for me to say that he needed to be fired. He was paid too much and he screwed up too often. Sometimes it worries me that I've become too mechanical when it comes to dealing with people, but at the end of the day it's fact that it's impractical for a company to lose money because of a bad employee.
I really don't know if anybody reads this thing anymore. I think it's a nonissue.
I'm very conflicted about having a female in my life. I desire a relationship, yet the simplicity in my life is so refreshing. This is the first time I've been single since I was 16. That is nearly 5 years. That is approximately 1/4th of my life. :|
Because this a public forum I feel like I have to state this: Now I'm just rambling. I should stop writing before I write something I don't mean, or that will embarrass myself.
At the end of the day what I can say is that my spirits are pretty high. I'm currently in California. I've been in this suburb hellhole for 1.5 weeks so far, and I'll have to be here another 2-3 weeks. I wake up everyday at 4:30-5:00 AM and work anywhere from 10-16 hours. I literally don't remember my last day off.
In the evenings the hours creep on and I always have a severe aversion to sleep. Every night I stay up too late. I think I have a psychological block that keeps me from just laying down and going to sleep. I never sleep without crashing - without physically not being able to stay awake. It's a pretty decently sized problem for me. What bothers me most is that for some reason I'm not able to convince myself that it's acceptable to go to sleep.
I feel very fortunate with my career. I'm currently making 2.5 times as much as I was 1.5 years ago, and this is satisfying. My boss wants me to run the engineering department at the office. This is a pretty big deal to me.
I'm pretty sure I have an addiction to moving forward. Stagnation is death. Unless I am actively progressing in some part of my life I fall into depression. Despite how good my job is, if I felt like I wasn't moving forward for too long I'd probably quit - for anything else.
One of my coworkers got fired today. It's challenging for me to say that he needed to be fired. He was paid too much and he screwed up too often. Sometimes it worries me that I've become too mechanical when it comes to dealing with people, but at the end of the day it's fact that it's impractical for a company to lose money because of a bad employee.
I really don't know if anybody reads this thing anymore. I think it's a nonissue.
I'm very conflicted about having a female in my life. I desire a relationship, yet the simplicity in my life is so refreshing. This is the first time I've been single since I was 16. That is nearly 5 years. That is approximately 1/4th of my life. :|
Because this a public forum I feel like I have to state this: Now I'm just rambling. I should stop writing before I write something I don't mean, or that will embarrass myself.