(no subject)
the battle's over...
why do i have such problem with confrontation. why is it so hard for me to just tell people how i feel to their face. behind the computer screen and the telephone you don't come face to face, you can't see their reaction, you can't see the hurt, or the tears, or the anger, or the fear. why is it so hard for us as people to look at those faces. it's saying we can hurt people, just without seeing the reaction. and why is it only with bad news. i mean, no one is afraid to throw a surprise party, the best part is seeing the look of surprise, no one throws a surprise party online. it would just be a bunch of people in a chatroom all typing really big, SURPRISE. what's the fun in that?
why am i so afraid to type the person's name i'm angry with. why am i so afraid to show my anger, my frustration. why do i put on a happy face and act like everything's ok between us. why can't i just say
"YOU ARE SO SELF-ABSORBED, EVERY CONVERSATION WE HAVE TURNS INTO SOMETHING WITH YOU NO MATTER WHAT IT IS. WHY CAN'T YOU SHUT UP FOR A FRICKIN MINUTE TO LISTEN TO WHAT SOMEONE ELSE IS DEALING WITH? IS IT TOO MUCH TO HANDLE? WELL I CAN'T HANDLE THIS ANYMORE. YOU ARE A SELFISH JERK WHO NEEDS TO GET OVER YOURSELF AND FIND MORE FRIENDS BECAUSE YOU JUST LOST THIS ONE"
how good does it feel to just write something.
why can't i find the courage in me to at least say whom i am speaking of, why can't i just say it and get it all there?
because i'm a coward.
...............my heart moves on
why do i have such problem with confrontation. why is it so hard for me to just tell people how i feel to their face. behind the computer screen and the telephone you don't come face to face, you can't see their reaction, you can't see the hurt, or the tears, or the anger, or the fear. why is it so hard for us as people to look at those faces. it's saying we can hurt people, just without seeing the reaction. and why is it only with bad news. i mean, no one is afraid to throw a surprise party, the best part is seeing the look of surprise, no one throws a surprise party online. it would just be a bunch of people in a chatroom all typing really big, SURPRISE. what's the fun in that?
why am i so afraid to type the person's name i'm angry with. why am i so afraid to show my anger, my frustration. why do i put on a happy face and act like everything's ok between us. why can't i just say
"YOU ARE SO SELF-ABSORBED, EVERY CONVERSATION WE HAVE TURNS INTO SOMETHING WITH YOU NO MATTER WHAT IT IS. WHY CAN'T YOU SHUT UP FOR A FRICKIN MINUTE TO LISTEN TO WHAT SOMEONE ELSE IS DEALING WITH? IS IT TOO MUCH TO HANDLE? WELL I CAN'T HANDLE THIS ANYMORE. YOU ARE A SELFISH JERK WHO NEEDS TO GET OVER YOURSELF AND FIND MORE FRIENDS BECAUSE YOU JUST LOST THIS ONE"
how good does it feel to just write something.
why can't i find the courage in me to at least say whom i am speaking of, why can't i just say it and get it all there?
because i'm a coward.
...............my heart moves on