Once upon a list...
Several months ago a list was made for me...several months ago said list disappeared. Yes this list was made to keep me busy and Him happy then business fell into my lap. The salon took what felt like every waking moment of my time, when i wasn't doing marketing, hr, accounting and any other hat i could fit on my head i wanted to just hide. Nothing pleased me more than to have a huge arguement. To the point i found myself digging around for one. If He asked if i wanted a million dollars i would say "NO!" just to spite Him. If He wanted me at his feet He better as hell throw me down to them! Yes this whole time the thoughts of "what are you doing!!!!!" "don't say that!!" "now you did it!" rushed around my head but did i stop? HELL NO! It was the stress. The stress of knowing the salon we had jumped into was not the salon the seller said it was. The stress of knowing no matter how much we dumped into the salon it was too fucked up by that previous owner to do anything about. Yes nothing like knowing the salon that on paper was hugely a finacial sucess was not it in the least. Yes we found the financial papers had several 0's added to make it look better. Yes we are in the middle of a lawsuit with this former owner. AND yes she's is sooo screwed and that is all i will say about that situation. Bum deal + lawsuit= possible fraud charges. All this while trying to plan a wedding! So that was my life for the past several months. Fun huh?
When i feel overwelmed i act out. There is no stopping it. There is just the horrid task of reeling me back in. See trying to stop it by shocking me either makes me get really made and say horrible things or just makes me run off and cry. Neither are fun.
Warren has mastered the art of calming me down and keeping me calm. During this time period my anger was never what it could have been. Stress....He got me through it. Now i just have a wedding to deal with and only the small tasks at that. Music for DJ and for the Harpist. Yay!
So this list...yeah it's back. Since i'm home so much more now i think it's bigger. This morning His goodbye was a kiss followed by "I look forward to coming to every room in the house clean and dinner ready." and then came that damn smile! So He called 2 hours later to check on me. "What are you doing?" "nothing" "Did you clean up?" "No." (yes i ask for trouble) So instead of cleaning i hope online. A few emails to rakastajatar who was suppose to be working! Chatted with taea_dol, kayt_arminta, falcngrl and littleminx for a bit then i remember i should be cleaning! Got distratced but it's now almost done...shit i got distracted again. It's ok i have 2 hours left to finish and that's just to finish vacuuming and everything is ready for dinner. Ok i totally forgot what this post was about.
When i feel overwelmed i act out. There is no stopping it. There is just the horrid task of reeling me back in. See trying to stop it by shocking me either makes me get really made and say horrible things or just makes me run off and cry. Neither are fun.
Warren has mastered the art of calming me down and keeping me calm. During this time period my anger was never what it could have been. Stress....He got me through it. Now i just have a wedding to deal with and only the small tasks at that. Music for DJ and for the Harpist. Yay!
So this list...yeah it's back. Since i'm home so much more now i think it's bigger. This morning His goodbye was a kiss followed by "I look forward to coming to every room in the house clean and dinner ready." and then came that damn smile! So He called 2 hours later to check on me. "What are you doing?" "nothing" "Did you clean up?" "No." (yes i ask for trouble) So instead of cleaning i hope online. A few emails to rakastajatar who was suppose to be working! Chatted with taea_dol, kayt_arminta, falcngrl and littleminx for a bit then i remember i should be cleaning! Got distratced but it's now almost done...shit i got distracted again. It's ok i have 2 hours left to finish and that's just to finish vacuuming and everything is ready for dinner. Ok i totally forgot what this post was about.