(no subject)
I want to be destroyed
But not so much it kills me
I want to be loved
But not so much I depend on it
I want to be envied
But not so much that I feel fake
I want to be forgiven
But not so much I become flawless
I want to be forgotten
But not so much that I'm not there
I want to be set free
But not so much I have no boundaries
I want to be high
But not so much I crash and burn
I want to fly
But not so much my wings melt away
I want to breathe
But not so much I suffocate
I need to live
Just enough to get by
---------------
When flying feels like falling
And sleeping never comes
Just look up to the stars
And wish that you were one
To live your life bright
And be marveled in the end
Too bad society took away
Our ability to pretend
Look around your world
And realize we are all at fault
That the star that you wanted to be
Is weighted down by asphalt
You cannot fly without falling
Because buildings litter the sky
And you cannot sleep without locked doors
For fear that you will die
We have only one life to live
One star to protect
So shelter it with all you have
It is all that you have left
-------------------
love a walking corpse
A zombie I suppose
He only comes after death
His love tends to decompose
I love a walking corpse
A vampire I confess
He makes me bleed dry
His love leaves a mess
I love a walking corpse
A ghost you could say
He only comes at night
His love stays until the day
I loved a human boy
Before he was laid to rest
And found that boys without hearts
Are really for the best
--------------
I'm going to plant a flower
In a place where nothing grows
I will nurture it and love it
And hope that the water flows
I will plant a flower
In my backyard
A desolate garden
That is barren and scarred
I will plant a flower
Under a tree
And maybe the shade
Will leave the flower be
I will plant a flower
Over a tombstone that read
"I planted a flower in your heart,
The flower is now dead"
-----------------
I am the face in the mirror, Only Not
I am the voice in your ears, Only Not
I am the touch on your fingertips, Only Not
I am me
Only Not
------------
The most precious things in life
Are the most fragile things in life
And the most memorable times
Are the hardest to hold on to
And the softest words spoken
Make the loudest impact on society
And a little bit of love
Can change the world
--------------
I miss the light
the way it would catch your eyes
making them sparkle just for me
And fill me with such joy I thought I would implode
I miss the sun and
The warm breeze it would bring
untangling my thoughts and all of my doubts
I miss the color of your hair
And how it would shine just right when we sat alone
No worries in the world
Just us
I miss your touch
and the way it made me feel safe
the way It made me feel alive
I miss your laugh
How it could cheer me up
No matter if my world was crashing down
But most of all
I miss you
And everything we used to be
-------------
This has been building
Like a beast in waiting
Its torn itself out of me
This has been killing
Like a serial killer on the lose
And I don't know if his jealousy or my scars
are what contribute to destroying us the most.
And I dont know if I'm holding on
Or if I'm afraid of letting go
------------
This vengeance
This hate
I want to forget it
I want to see it grow inside of me
Everytime I see you
Im torn
These two sides of me
That only you can bring out
Beauty
Pain
I want it to be gone
I want it to stay
I dont want to be
the only one who can see
the beauty in this destruction.
--------------
And this disease that is me
has slowly taken its hold
I cant eat I cant sleep
Without feeling so alone
Distanced Isolated
From myself, from everyone around
I have no home
I have no hope
Life has become a routine
that I rarely follow anymore
I barely recognize the look in the mirror
The person I have become is never who I wanted to be
Cure this disease that is me
Give me a reason
To be clean
To love
To believe
To cherish all I am given
To live life
Once again
---------------
If I told you my heart beats for only you
Would you leave the world behind
That every second I see your face
It makes me feel complete inside
And all the times I see you with someone else
It completely kills me
That You make me a better person
make me want to change myself
If I told you I was willing to take
every ounce of heartache
For just a second of you
And me
If I said you were everything
Would you realize
I Always fix what you break.
Because I love you
--------------
Im a machine
rusted and broken down
you cant fix me
my parts are just laying around
Im a machine
Forgetten and alone
destroy me
you have no use for me now
Im a machine
I have no feelings at all
Im just a heartless machine
So let me fall
---------
We say this is over
Before its barely begun
And I keep finding reasons
In the barrel of this gun
They say friends are forever
Forever ended yesterday
Though its hard to move on
I know you wont stay
I find disappointment
In knowing you didnt choose me
But I wont ever give in
This is not my apology
Keep your friends close
Your enemies closer
You should know
You were always closest to me
-----------
Would it really hurt that much to let me in
Let me lose myself in your eyes
those eyes that only shine for her
And for once hold me as if I will break
Hold me forever
Because sometimes I wake up
and all that gets me going is you
These dreams I make up
show me what I'll never have
I wish this game of cat and mouse
would end right now
Because its never alright
to sleep alone
dreaming of sleeping
next to you
Its never alright that the whole world stops
For five minutes of forced smiles and awkward hugs
Just to run away when she turns the corner
Its never alright to make me choose
between waking up to hate you
or falling asleep in love
and spending each day wanting what I can never have
-------------
But not so much it kills me
I want to be loved
But not so much I depend on it
I want to be envied
But not so much that I feel fake
I want to be forgiven
But not so much I become flawless
I want to be forgotten
But not so much that I'm not there
I want to be set free
But not so much I have no boundaries
I want to be high
But not so much I crash and burn
I want to fly
But not so much my wings melt away
I want to breathe
But not so much I suffocate
I need to live
Just enough to get by
---------------
When flying feels like falling
And sleeping never comes
Just look up to the stars
And wish that you were one
To live your life bright
And be marveled in the end
Too bad society took away
Our ability to pretend
Look around your world
And realize we are all at fault
That the star that you wanted to be
Is weighted down by asphalt
You cannot fly without falling
Because buildings litter the sky
And you cannot sleep without locked doors
For fear that you will die
We have only one life to live
One star to protect
So shelter it with all you have
It is all that you have left
-------------------
love a walking corpse
A zombie I suppose
He only comes after death
His love tends to decompose
I love a walking corpse
A vampire I confess
He makes me bleed dry
His love leaves a mess
I love a walking corpse
A ghost you could say
He only comes at night
His love stays until the day
I loved a human boy
Before he was laid to rest
And found that boys without hearts
Are really for the best
--------------
I'm going to plant a flower
In a place where nothing grows
I will nurture it and love it
And hope that the water flows
I will plant a flower
In my backyard
A desolate garden
That is barren and scarred
I will plant a flower
Under a tree
And maybe the shade
Will leave the flower be
I will plant a flower
Over a tombstone that read
"I planted a flower in your heart,
The flower is now dead"
-----------------
I am the face in the mirror, Only Not
I am the voice in your ears, Only Not
I am the touch on your fingertips, Only Not
I am me
Only Not
------------
The most precious things in life
Are the most fragile things in life
And the most memorable times
Are the hardest to hold on to
And the softest words spoken
Make the loudest impact on society
And a little bit of love
Can change the world
--------------
I miss the light
the way it would catch your eyes
making them sparkle just for me
And fill me with such joy I thought I would implode
I miss the sun and
The warm breeze it would bring
untangling my thoughts and all of my doubts
I miss the color of your hair
And how it would shine just right when we sat alone
No worries in the world
Just us
I miss your touch
and the way it made me feel safe
the way It made me feel alive
I miss your laugh
How it could cheer me up
No matter if my world was crashing down
But most of all
I miss you
And everything we used to be
-------------
This has been building
Like a beast in waiting
Its torn itself out of me
This has been killing
Like a serial killer on the lose
And I don't know if his jealousy or my scars
are what contribute to destroying us the most.
And I dont know if I'm holding on
Or if I'm afraid of letting go
------------
This vengeance
This hate
I want to forget it
I want to see it grow inside of me
Everytime I see you
Im torn
These two sides of me
That only you can bring out
Beauty
Pain
I want it to be gone
I want it to stay
I dont want to be
the only one who can see
the beauty in this destruction.
--------------
And this disease that is me
has slowly taken its hold
I cant eat I cant sleep
Without feeling so alone
Distanced Isolated
From myself, from everyone around
I have no home
I have no hope
Life has become a routine
that I rarely follow anymore
I barely recognize the look in the mirror
The person I have become is never who I wanted to be
Cure this disease that is me
Give me a reason
To be clean
To love
To believe
To cherish all I am given
To live life
Once again
---------------
If I told you my heart beats for only you
Would you leave the world behind
That every second I see your face
It makes me feel complete inside
And all the times I see you with someone else
It completely kills me
That You make me a better person
make me want to change myself
If I told you I was willing to take
every ounce of heartache
For just a second of you
And me
If I said you were everything
Would you realize
I Always fix what you break.
Because I love you
--------------
Im a machine
rusted and broken down
you cant fix me
my parts are just laying around
Im a machine
Forgetten and alone
destroy me
you have no use for me now
Im a machine
I have no feelings at all
Im just a heartless machine
So let me fall
---------
We say this is over
Before its barely begun
And I keep finding reasons
In the barrel of this gun
They say friends are forever
Forever ended yesterday
Though its hard to move on
I know you wont stay
I find disappointment
In knowing you didnt choose me
But I wont ever give in
This is not my apology
Keep your friends close
Your enemies closer
You should know
You were always closest to me
-----------
Would it really hurt that much to let me in
Let me lose myself in your eyes
those eyes that only shine for her
And for once hold me as if I will break
Hold me forever
Because sometimes I wake up
and all that gets me going is you
These dreams I make up
show me what I'll never have
I wish this game of cat and mouse
would end right now
Because its never alright
to sleep alone
dreaming of sleeping
next to you
Its never alright that the whole world stops
For five minutes of forced smiles and awkward hugs
Just to run away when she turns the corner
Its never alright to make me choose
between waking up to hate you
or falling asleep in love
and spending each day wanting what I can never have
-------------