Thoughts.
Sometimes I just want to give up everything. It happens when I feel so frustratingly upset and angry. Maybe when my feelings and/or fears of abandonment resurface. But that's not all the time. By giving up everything, I don't mean suicide or anything like that. I just want to forfeit everything... maybe begin my life anew elsewhere. But of course, there's no way to absolutely begin life anew anywhere else. You always bring your own past or whatever with you wherever you go. But you know? It gets quite overwhelming sometimes.
Maybe my doubt is just always in my mind, sometimes hiding in the back, sometimes it's just there. I can't concentrate on anything now. My mind is still muddled. Maybe this entry is a mistake. Maybe everything is a mistake. My whole life was a mistake. That might be an insult to my dead mother but that's just how I feel. I can't take it anymore.
The tears threaten to fall but I don't want them to. What's the point of crying? I can't even clear my head. Everything is moot.
Maybe my doubt is just always in my mind, sometimes hiding in the back, sometimes it's just there. I can't concentrate on anything now. My mind is still muddled. Maybe this entry is a mistake. Maybe everything is a mistake. My whole life was a mistake. That might be an insult to my dead mother but that's just how I feel. I can't take it anymore.
The tears threaten to fall but I don't want them to. What's the point of crying? I can't even clear my head. Everything is moot.