(no subject)
I am trying this time with Jason. Things seem to be better. We are spending more time together and that was one thing we really needed. However, everytime I take one step forward I take what seems to be 1-2 steps back. It's Jeff. I want him, always have and probably always will. How am I ever going to get past the past? My Codependency Group is ending and I am going back into individual counsiling bc I really feel I need to work on the issues that hold me back from moving forward. Period.
I enjoy my time with Jason. So why is that not enough to let go of the past? If I want a happy, normal relationship and a future with someone I need to let go of Jeff. It is so hard bc this is not the way it is suppose to be. Jeff said the same thing. He told me the other day that he wishes we could work things out and be together. I just want to cry. I don't know what to do. I know he is seeing someone who lives across the freakin street from me! Of all places she has to live in Braddock Apartments. Fuck. Everytime he is there I will have to drive by and see. It has been since March, maybe even Feburary that I had to deal with him being with someone else. I have got used to him being around again, persuing me. Why can I not hold onto the hate to get past it all? The entire thing just sucks.
One thing I do know is that if I plan to go anywhere in this relationship with Jason then I need to let go of Jeff! I think that had a lot to do with why Jason and I didn't work to begin with.
Anyways, i need to get to work. I had a flat tire this morning and came in late. i need to get some work done now that I am here.
Lisa
I enjoy my time with Jason. So why is that not enough to let go of the past? If I want a happy, normal relationship and a future with someone I need to let go of Jeff. It is so hard bc this is not the way it is suppose to be. Jeff said the same thing. He told me the other day that he wishes we could work things out and be together. I just want to cry. I don't know what to do. I know he is seeing someone who lives across the freakin street from me! Of all places she has to live in Braddock Apartments. Fuck. Everytime he is there I will have to drive by and see. It has been since March, maybe even Feburary that I had to deal with him being with someone else. I have got used to him being around again, persuing me. Why can I not hold onto the hate to get past it all? The entire thing just sucks.
One thing I do know is that if I plan to go anywhere in this relationship with Jason then I need to let go of Jeff! I think that had a lot to do with why Jason and I didn't work to begin with.
Anyways, i need to get to work. I had a flat tire this morning and came in late. i need to get some work done now that I am here.
Lisa