Second verse, worse than the first
Today was one of those days that started out nice, then turned into shit cake.
I lurk fandomsecrets, like most of you probably do. Most of the time, they make me lol, the secrets. And then there's this. This is probably the first one that really ticked me off, because I've spent the last, two, three years trying to get away from weeaboo Japanese art and try and get better at a style that, quite frankly, looks better.
I bet it's a troll. But it still makes me want to kill someone
But the best (worst? YOU DECIDE) part was that I had to work. Again. I talked the other day about having to work almost forty hours even though I'm only part-time. Thing is, the Stonebriar Claire's has been short on people, so I agreed a couple of weeks ago to help them out today. Only thing is, last week Katey decided she wasn't going to show up for work anymore. This not only left me at the store for nine hours when I was supposed to only have four, but now we're extremely short-staffed. So I'm working so many days at our store, plus now this one. The only day off I have so far this week is tomorrow, and it's only because that's the day I have so many fucking classes I cannot work.
Anyways. Stonebriar. This was the clincher. Not only was I at a store that I am completely unfamiliar with, but whaddaya know! They have shiny new registers! So I have to have a crash course in how to use the thing (because, no, Hooz, your store can't has shiny new registers), and end up calling the girl who was working before me about ten times. Come closing, I've got a very short register and have been there much longer than I was supposed to be, and the automated deposit fucks up and doesn't read it. Of course, because our store doesn't deal with ATM deposits, we're sensible and drop it off at a bank, I have no idea what to do. So I freak the fuck out. Like, I'm hyperventilating in the freaking middle of the mall- There's nobody around because it's fucking ten at night, and I called Latesha and she told me it happens a lot, but still. It was added stress I did not need. This is the second time this week work has made me cry.
I started last night, and forgot I have a strict "No carbonation on the first day" rule because I have a history of bad bloating, and chugged a Coke with lunch. Needless to say I almost made myself sick.
I zoned out while driving and almost ran a red light.
I've got friends going through some shit and I don't know how to help. Or I've forgotten.
I have drawing homework that isn't done. I don't have time to draw any more, and drawing for myself save doodles in my notes is completely out of the question. This, of course, does not help my aspirations, as lack of practicing and drawing leads to less remembering how to do it well, which leads to more suckage. Which leads to total rejection and the crushing of any dreams, which leads to continuing the mediocre life that started the vicious cycle in the first place.
I can't stop feeling like I'm trapped. Like I'm not going anywhere with my life.
Maybe I should have stayed in Virginia.
Okay. Time to focus on the good things that happened today:
* I got a new trash can with a lid so Dodger can't go sniffing around and looting it while I sleep
* I took a half-an-hour nap that was fantastic
* A stroke of RPing genius. That usually happens when I play Watari
* This icon is so appropriate it makes me smile
I feel better. Sort of. But now I'm just tired.
I lurk fandomsecrets, like most of you probably do. Most of the time, they make me lol, the secrets. And then there's this. This is probably the first one that really ticked me off, because I've spent the last, two, three years trying to get away from weeaboo Japanese art and try and get better at a style that, quite frankly, looks better.
I bet it's a troll. But it still makes me want to kill someone
But the best (worst? YOU DECIDE) part was that I had to work. Again. I talked the other day about having to work almost forty hours even though I'm only part-time. Thing is, the Stonebriar Claire's has been short on people, so I agreed a couple of weeks ago to help them out today. Only thing is, last week Katey decided she wasn't going to show up for work anymore. This not only left me at the store for nine hours when I was supposed to only have four, but now we're extremely short-staffed. So I'm working so many days at our store, plus now this one. The only day off I have so far this week is tomorrow, and it's only because that's the day I have so many fucking classes I cannot work.
Anyways. Stonebriar. This was the clincher. Not only was I at a store that I am completely unfamiliar with, but whaddaya know! They have shiny new registers! So I have to have a crash course in how to use the thing (because, no, Hooz, your store can't has shiny new registers), and end up calling the girl who was working before me about ten times. Come closing, I've got a very short register and have been there much longer than I was supposed to be, and the automated deposit fucks up and doesn't read it. Of course, because our store doesn't deal with ATM deposits, we're sensible and drop it off at a bank, I have no idea what to do. So I freak the fuck out. Like, I'm hyperventilating in the freaking middle of the mall- There's nobody around because it's fucking ten at night, and I called Latesha and she told me it happens a lot, but still. It was added stress I did not need. This is the second time this week work has made me cry.
I started last night, and forgot I have a strict "No carbonation on the first day" rule because I have a history of bad bloating, and chugged a Coke with lunch. Needless to say I almost made myself sick.
I zoned out while driving and almost ran a red light.
I've got friends going through some shit and I don't know how to help. Or I've forgotten.
I have drawing homework that isn't done. I don't have time to draw any more, and drawing for myself save doodles in my notes is completely out of the question. This, of course, does not help my aspirations, as lack of practicing and drawing leads to less remembering how to do it well, which leads to more suckage. Which leads to total rejection and the crushing of any dreams, which leads to continuing the mediocre life that started the vicious cycle in the first place.
I can't stop feeling like I'm trapped. Like I'm not going anywhere with my life.
Maybe I should have stayed in Virginia.
Okay. Time to focus on the good things that happened today:
* I got a new trash can with a lid so Dodger can't go sniffing around and looting it while I sleep
* I took a half-an-hour nap that was fantastic
* A stroke of RPing genius. That usually happens when I play Watari
* This icon is so appropriate it makes me smile
I feel better. Sort of. But now I'm just tired.