BOOBIES!

[hoosierbitch]

Good news: I took my notebook with me to dinner, and got some writing done!
Bad news: when I got home, I dropped my bag (and v. pointy notebook) on my toe.

Ow.

Comments

[lionessvalenti]

Dude, I love any conversation about boobs. No complaints here. :D

I used to give a lot of concrit. I was good at it. I always flanked the criticisms with compliments, so it wasn't just "here's the issues", but "here's the issues, and here's the stuff I liked too". Just piling on the criticisms never worked for me (except once when a story was really bad on many levels and really pissed me off, but that was an extreme circumstance and will probably never happen again). To take the time to leave a thoughtful comment, I wasn't going to do it for any story, I had to really think the author was good to point out the issues. I wanted to believe that the advice may actually be put into consideration. I stopped giving it, though, after dealing with situations where people I know who say they can take concrit, but really can't and take it personally and it's a big issue. So I just stopped altogether. It's hard for me to receive concrit sometimes, because it can make me just feel dumb (AS YOU NOW KNOW), but I know it's for the betterment of the story, or the future of my writing. If I receive a comment on something, especially if it makes me really feel something, I'm going to remember it. I always remember the moments when I feel stupid, so I'm going to try to avoid that again. And, dear god, I'd never take out those feelings and make it an issue with the person who pointed it out. Everyone has issues in their writing and/or makes mistakes.

Um. Huh, that got long. But anyway, now if I have an issue with a story, I usually just ignore or it don't leave a comment at all. Fanfic isn't worth friendship rifts, and anymore, I don't want to assume someone is okay with it, even if they say they are.

[hoosierbitch]

Boobies are the best! OO <--mah boobs

See, I used to be one of those people who say that they're good at taking concrit - I used to end my posts with "feedback and concrit are welcome," or something like that - but then my insecurity kicked in when I GOT some concrit, and I realized that no, actually, concrit makes me feel quite terrible. Unless it's delivered with a lot of compliments and handholding. And I don't want to, like, put THAT at the bottom of a post!

So I'm pretty hands-off about leaving anything remotely concrit-ish in comments (although I will say what I think if someone flat-out asks me, and I beta once in a blue moon for writers that I love and trust, LIKE YOU).

And - well. I don't know. Sharing my writing with anyone makes me really anxious - so I kind of like that if I post something online and it SUCKS, the worst that'll happen is that people won't say anything at all, not that they'll say: OMG LOOKIT HOW YOU SUCK! Because I think I'm still sort of fragile enough as a writer that if I got a lot of concrit on everything I posted, I'd stop posting. I know that's kind of stupid, though, because I won't get better if I don't get feedback. So I'm trying to think of relatively painless ways to GET that kind of feedback, so that I can improve as a writer, without crushing my self-esteem.

Erm. Apparently I really felt like rambling about my issues at you. ♥?

[lionessvalenti]

My boobs are more like o___o They are average-ish and wideset. I wear push-ups for the illusion of cleavage.

I think, the fact is, as writers, we're all fragile no matter how well we say we can take it. It's what we do with the concrit. I see people talking themselves out of the criticisms they receive, telling themselves the person is wrong. And that's not really helpful to yourself. It was funny, last night I saw Hart Hanson tweeting about how he was writing and it was crappy, and Jeff Eastin replied that what he was writing was crappier. It made me think, last year I went to a Doctor Who con and I was talking with Rob Shearman, a writer, (both of us were SO DRUNK at this point) and he said that the feeling that your writing sucks never goes away. Even if you're a professional, getting paid for it, you will always think your writing is terrible.

That actually made me feel better. Well, except that realization that the feeling that my writing is horrible will never go away, but that I'm not alone in it. People who are paid to write feel the same way about their work.

♥! I've kind of always been one of those people that people find they can talk to about anything. I'm accustomed to it at this point. :)