wow
I preface tonight's entry with a phrase that of the people who understand, only Kate Contel will read:
"I never thought I'd do it, but I did!"
At the time I was talking about smoking pot, but also drinking alcohol...
I never thought I'd drink alcohol.
BUT I DID!
For those of you that know me this is a BIG DEAL, for I had previously sworn it off as a bad thing since it changes the way you think and act. Blah blah blah my cousin is an alcoholic blah blah blah no one cares, but in truth I had sworn it off for the majority of my natural life.
But then I realized, it is absolutely silly to remain in anger.
I can't continue to blame Jamie for Robin's death. I want to, OH God do I want to, but I cannot. I must learn to release my anger.
And therefore, I have learned to accept alcohol with a large smattering of responsibility.
And then I just fucken let loose.
One beer and five shots of Vodka probably doesn't sound like much to you guys, but to me it's huge.
And I am a happy silly drunk!!! Finding out I'm not an angry or depressed drunk really made my night. But I am also extremely easy to coerce into saying things I may later regret. Oh well, the truth comes out when you're drunk, so better late than never.
I love you all and I love the Faux Paz more than anything else I've ever dreamed to love. Well, not more than Meredith or Maegan or Addie or Laura or Beth or my family, or life in general, but a whole heck full of love, I swear it!
PS: my head is swooshy
"I never thought I'd do it, but I did!"
At the time I was talking about smoking pot, but also drinking alcohol...
I never thought I'd drink alcohol.
BUT I DID!
For those of you that know me this is a BIG DEAL, for I had previously sworn it off as a bad thing since it changes the way you think and act. Blah blah blah my cousin is an alcoholic blah blah blah no one cares, but in truth I had sworn it off for the majority of my natural life.
But then I realized, it is absolutely silly to remain in anger.
I can't continue to blame Jamie for Robin's death. I want to, OH God do I want to, but I cannot. I must learn to release my anger.
And therefore, I have learned to accept alcohol with a large smattering of responsibility.
And then I just fucken let loose.
One beer and five shots of Vodka probably doesn't sound like much to you guys, but to me it's huge.
And I am a happy silly drunk!!! Finding out I'm not an angry or depressed drunk really made my night. But I am also extremely easy to coerce into saying things I may later regret. Oh well, the truth comes out when you're drunk, so better late than never.
I love you all and I love the Faux Paz more than anything else I've ever dreamed to love. Well, not more than Meredith or Maegan or Addie or Laura or Beth or my family, or life in general, but a whole heck full of love, I swear it!
PS: my head is swooshy