The ninjas then joined forces with the pirates and brought you this! [Aftermath + Omakes]
The Aftermath to this insanity is more or less found in this post, haha~ Along with some comedy relief at the end. For ... yeah, the total lulz. Once again written in collaboration with sock_panda.
--
Teenagers were indeed teenagers and no sooner had the party reached full swing did two of them sneak off together, the stuffy event being more than they could handle for hours on end. Hand in hand, Lambo led his date for the evening out into the bustling streets of Italy, laughing and smiling and having a fun time now that they weren’t cooped up for the evening. He held on to her and she held back, proving he wasn’t alone and wouldn’t have to be - not without due cause, and they both hoped that day was long in coming. For his part, Lambo still couldn’t get over how beautiful she looked in her oriental-styled clothing, bright but muted colors accenting her eyes and her face and her slim body that he had admired long before this night. A braided bun atop her head completed the look and she could have been a model straight from a magazine if it wasn’t for those fighting skills she had no trouble showing off when two men tried to harass them in an abandoned alley.
Hours later and they ended up on the weathered roof of an old, vacant hotel to watch the sun rise together, Lambo holding her tight to his body to keep her warm. And, in a way, reassure her that they were in this together - this being the world they had been raised in and the world they would continue to grow in. It was comforting to have someone to share the burden with at the end of the day and he was lucky his shoulder to lean on was stronger than his because if his resolve weakened she would be there to change that. She had his back, as much as he had hers. People may have called him weak, a pest, and unneeded. But he wasn’t the Vongola Thunder Guardian for no good reason. He would show them, if the occasion called for it, what a real Guardian could do. Nothing would stop that resolve, because he could tolerate - had tolerated for years, this pain, and this life, this everything. I-Pin had been the only one who had seen him change throughout the long years, though. He placed his trust in her; just like she did - without fail - in return.
~
"I'm so ... I'm so sorry, Squalo. Hold still, hold still! Let me see!" Dino fought with the swordsman for a few minutes until the man gave up and held out his hand for inspection. Four deep marks from the fork marred the skin of the only real hand Squalo possessed. Wincing in sympathy, he brought the hand to his lips and kissed the wounds, eyes fluttering shut as a tongue snaked out to clean away the blood just as he had done to the icing earlier. "I'm sorry," he said one last time, opening his eyes to show his apology was completely sincere and further tugging the Varia's Rain closer to him to place a light kiss to protesting lips. "Let me make it all better," he mumbled into the clumsy kiss, a change from the more experienced ones he had been giving. Squalo was pushing at his shoulders already, wishing to pin him down, but he smirked into the kiss as well this time and pushed back. "That just won't do. No, no, no." And with each 'no', he punctuated it with a feather-light press of lips to an exposed neck, already relishing in the control he was being giving once more, no matter how unwillingly.
“Vooooi, f-fucking brat,” was gritted out with a glare, Squalo clearly unused to the reversal of roles. “Don’t think I’d do this for just any fucking brat either,” he managed to say before lips once more silenced him, hands working to unbutton the dress shirt that had been hidden under the swordsman’s earlier coat. Gasping for breath a few seconds later, the job was half-way done when Dino realized cold steel was at his throat again, the blade threatening to sink deeper into his skin.
Pushing it away with nothing more than his index finger, Dino muttered out an annoyed, “You’re going to have to get rid of that thing. It’s going to get in the way.”
Surprisingly his request was answered as the sword was tossed aside from its once hold on the mechanical arm of the swordsman. His surprise wasn’t long-lived for that very same hand tightly gripped his jaw, metal holding no warmth for his skin at all and instead sapping what heat he gave off through its chilling presence. He shivered instinctively; he had never gotten use to that hand, never understand why Squalo had needed to cut it off in the first place. Their first fight had been over that hand and it would forever be a reminder of how far they had come, how many times they had fought and hated one another only to end up like this time and time again. It made no sense, yet neither of them wanted it to end, even if they were all too aware of what would happen if they continued on like this.
Frustrated, Dino knocked that hand away from him, wincing in the end since that had hurt a bit more than he had expected. A chuckle from the swordsman gave him pause for all of a moment before he took at his frustration out on an unsuspecting Squalo by slamming his forehead against the other’s much like his tutor would have done to a certain rival. “You’re so … so you,” he struggled to say, wanting badly to swear but knowing that wouldn’t have done any good either way he looked it. “Can’t you just … for once not be?”
“Vooooi, fucking brat,” Squalo repeated, propping himself up on his elbows as the blond continued to straddle his lap. “You know that wouldn’t work.” Reluctantly, Dino agreed. That intolerability that was purely one of Squalo’s engrained traits was one of the qualities that had first drawn the Cavallone heir in, wanting to get under the other’s skin and learn what really made the swordsman tick. He may not have liked what he saw, but that somehow had led to him wanting to change that person, even if he knew that same person didn’t want to be changed. “Now where were we, fucking brat,” lazily drawled Squalo, tugging at the back of Dino’s neck with a hand. “Don’t stop what you’ve started, shithead. I’ll kill you.”
Shaking his head to clear it, Dino gave him the expected grin before giving up on making sense of what Squalo was to him these days. One minute they were enemies fighting at one another’s throat and next they were more attached than two newlyweds on a honeymoon. It confused him endlessly, but …
Strangely he wouldn’t have it any other way.
~
Fwump.
A figure landed on the ground in a tangle of flailing arms and blankets, a loud groan following seconds after as Yamamoto Takeshi stuck his head out from the mess of limbs and fabric, blinking sleep out of his eyes.
“… What are you doing, waking up the prince so early?” came an irritated voice from above. Rubbing the back of his head in a style reminiscent of himself a few years back, the baseball player grinned up at the other person on the bed he was on moments ago.
“Ahahaha … Sorry, sorry,” he was quick to make amends as he extracted himself from the blankets and picked them up, dark eyes gleaming with amusement as he smiled at a rather disgruntled blonde genius. Belphegor’s usual grin was absent, a light frown decorating his features as he looked pointedly at the bundle of blankets in the other man’s arms. It was still early morning, and the frosty air from the previous night still lingered in the air so it was only natural for him to feel cold, even colder seeing as he was currently naked without anything clothing nearby to reach for. Thankfully, the blankets were soon deposited on the large bed and the prince, grateful for some warmth, stretched out his hands without looking to grab them. His hand didn’t touch fabric though, instead closing around the wrist of his startled lover, instinctively jerking the other man forwards to land face-first on the bed.
Slightly startled himself (though he’d probably never admit it), Bel stared at the messy black hair in front of him, “Ushishishi, aren’t we eager today? Waking me up this early,” his laughter rang through the calm silence, “Didn’t we get enough last night?”
Yamamoto’s laughter joined the blond’s as he sat up, looking happily at his companion before leaning down to place a light kiss on Bel’s nose.
“Well it has been three months; you can’t blame me for being eager.”
~
“Oya, oya, what have we got here, hm?”
That was the first thing Hibari heard as he was woken from his slumber. And there was obviously something wrong, seeing as it came from right beside him. A split second later, the skylark’s eyes shot open and he was instinctively reaching for his tonfas. Unfortunately for him, said tonfas did not seem to be in their usual place beside his bed, leaving his hands grasping at nothing but cold air.
“Kufufu. You’re not planning to attack me after … all we did last night, are you?” That definitely stopped him in his tracks. Since when did bitter rivals - even if they were fellow Guardians - end up in the same room, the same bed together? Fate seemed to really hate Hibari today, as he was suddenly assaulted by a pounding headache, courtesy of all the (unwilling) drinking he was forced into doing the previous night at the party. Refusing to turn around and meet the gaze of the person beside him - quite obviously Mukuro, of course - he focused on shutting out the pain and thinking back to how the hell something like that could have happened. Even more unfortunately for the Cloud, the pain between his legs also decided to flare up, further worsening his mood, if that were possible. Without warning, a pair of arms encircled his waist; pulling him flush against perhaps the person he hated the most in the world at the moment.
“… You’re dead,” was all Hibari could manage, still fighting to sort out his thoughts and fish up the previous night’s events. His memory also had decided to play up; coupled with the large hangover he had, destroying his already very short patience in one blow.
The other man’s laugh echoed mockingly through the empty room. “But wasn’t it so courteous of you, poor little Hibari, to collapse on my dear Chrome-chan last night? She even decided to bring you all the way back here and spare you spending a night all alone in the party room.” That triggered something in black-haired man’s brain and the events the occurred after slowly made their way out from the still groggy part of his mind. Collapsing against Chrome, somehow making it back to her room and the woman - also close to passing out from the effort - suddenly transforming to be replaced by … That man. Always being one to take advantage of a weakened opponent, Mukuro had of course, taken the chance of ... toying with Hibari while he was in his half-unconscious state.
And that’s where his thoughts returned to the current situation. The morning after the party, stuck in bed with the one, the only Rokudo Mukuro.
“Kufufu … Don’t be thinking I’ll let you go anytime soon, my little Kyoya-chan…”
~
The dining room seemed unusually empty that morning. Well, perhaps not that unusual seeing as it was the morning after a huge party. People were bound to be ... occupied on days like this. None of this really concerned Reborn though, as he strolled into the quiet room. It seemed that the only other person in the room was currently occupied with his breakfast, back turned, mouth working furiously on chewing. This person also happened to be Colonello. And this certain blond was certainly unaware of his so-called 'rival' that had just walked in. No, this morning was not going to be quiet at all.
This point was further proven as Colonello turned to see who had entered the kitchen as well, shoving a spoonful of cereal into his awaiting mouth. Around the cereal, he commented without any real vindication just yet, "You're up early, hey." He figured a stand-still in their earlier fight would be better suited for this earlier morning hour, but that smug little smirk from Reborn made him reconsider that - ready to take it back in an instant. "Oi, don't just stand there and watch, you bastard. Pull up a seat, hey!" He had long swallowed his cereal and took another spoonful, mostly to prevent his self from saying more. Also, it gave him something to do with his hands rather than grabbing for the machine gun always on his back - no matter what he was wearing, which happened to be nothing more than a light, camo-printed shirt and boxers due to not wanting to get dressed just yet.
The smirk only grew as the dark-haired man approached the table, "Didn't your parents teach you any respect, talking with your mouth full like that?" he replied, the words 'Good Morning' obviously non-existent in his vocabulary. This served to grate on Colonello's nerves, and with a few more well-placed taunts, the expert hitman had all but driven him crazy.
Cereal now forgotten, the blond slammed his foot down, almost jumping across the table, machine gun clutched tightly in his hands, "What the hell do you want, hey?"
"Nothing but to eat my breakfast in peace," came the smooth reply, as Reborn brought a cup of freshly ground coffee to his lips, "Without anyone breaking any tables, especially one belonging to our gracious host."
Before a single shot could be fired by the rowdy blond, Reborn had already placed his coffee back down onto the table and pressed a cocked gun to the Spartan's temple in an unforgiving manner. "Now, now. Learn some respect and I might take you seriously," drawled the hitman, finger calmly pressing against the trigger as if to really pull it and finally end this charade. Rolling his eyes when he noticed the sweat slowly starting to build on Colonello's brow, he eased up, clicking the safety back into place and quirking an amused eyebrow. "Do you think I'd kill my entertainment value?" As the blond went to retaliate with his own gun rather than words, Reborn firmly gripped the other's wrist to stop further movements. Then twisting the arm backwards, he pressed it into a tensed back and leaned his head down to taunt near an ear. "So slow. No wonder no one takes you seriously, hm?"
Dino, dressed only in a robe and yawning widely, stepped into the kitchen and took one quick look around before doing an abrupt about-face and marching right back out. "Whoops, don't mind me." Colonello's outrage was heard throughout the Manor without further ado.
-- OMAKES --
Xanxus stormed out of the room, glaring pure murder at anyone who even dared to get in his way.
"Xanxus suuuuure looks angry," a lazy voice drawled, the occupant of it leaning casually back against the wall and observing the Varia Boss with something akin to open-admiration if the man hadn't been so completely bored. "Leave him alone," another advised, fidgeting on the spot, "we don't want to start any trouble."
Fuming too much to listen too carefully to the passing comment, the dark-haired man stepped briskly into the brightly lit corridors, door swinging shut behind him, immediately cutting the amount of noise down. "Fucking trash," he muttered to himself, blindly turning the first corner he came to.
The man who had spoken before, though, the one who had been bypassed as if he wasn't even there, curiously followed after the furious leader - but mostly because he had noticed a certain beauty conveniently by the punch bowl near the doorway, pouring herself something to drink. Bianchi looked as striking as always and Shamal doubted he would pass up any chance to win her over. However, when he arrived, she was gone and he was left standing there with the still building curiosity to know what had annoyed that spoiled brat of a Varia Boss. Having nothing better to do, he followed Xanxus out into the hallway, keeping to the shadows before laughing and ruining the image of a perfect assassin by stepping out into plain sight behind the man. "Oi, kiddo, what's this tantrum all about?"
Whirling around instinctively, the 'kiddo' already had a gun out, pointing it directly at the doctor's face with a thunderous expression. "What the fuck do you think you're doing, following me?"
"Oho," the man held up his hands defensively with a smirk, "I just thought I'd see what's a matter with our dear Xanxus, no?"
The man's expression was stony, red eyes focused angrily on Shamal's own. "If you're just here for entertainment, fucking leave before I kill you."
"Nothing of the sort," amended the doctor who would have preferred, to be completely honest and all that, to be talking to a beautiful lady instead of a brat with more baggage with him than a tourist on holiday. "I'm being polite," he mentioned off-handedly, shoving his hands into the pockets of his slacks and shrugging with the usual indifference. "Don't mind me, go ahead and rampage away."
"Che," spat Xanxus disdainfully as he stepped closer to Shamal, gun still raised, "So you do have a death wish, don't you?" Seconds away from pulling the trigger, a sudden crashing noise was heard from a room, its door ajar mere steps away from the pair. Shamal managed to crane his neck back, surprised to see not a person, but rather a ... turtle?
Seeing the opportunity for what it was, an idea springing to mind, Shamal released a trident mosquito from hiding with well-timed precision and hid his grin by turning his head properly to see the creature - completely disregarding the gun as he commented lightly, "Seems we have a little friend who's lost." Enzio, on the floor and scuttling ever closer with slow movements, looked remarkably innocent considering his otherwise man-eating ways.
Caught slightly off guard (though he'd never admit it), Xanxus failed to notice the mosquito before it was too late. A light pinch on the side of his neck later, the Varia boss had a sudden dizzy spell, all while feeling a remarkable change happen inside himself.
Shamal, smug in his victory, sauntered away, but not before bending and patting the turtle happily on the back. "Good luck, little fellow.”
Xanxus didn't like this unusual feeling, he hated it. But all rage was washed away when he laid eyes on the clueless turtle that had waddled its way out into the corridor in front of him.
The turtle looked up at him and the only thing Xanxus could do was clasp his hands together - completely reluctant, mind you, but his body seemed to have a mind of its own - and, in a scary and remarkably similar voice to Lussuria, cooed out a small, "Aren't you just the cuteness thing?" He could have gagged.
The keyword being 'could.' Unfortunately for him, the strange behaviour did not stop there, and the next thing he knew he had picked up Enzio in a swish of dark fabric - similar to those dark and enigmatic superheroes - with a light blush dusting his usually stoic face.
Continuing on with his uniquely Xanxus-man - X-man for sort - poses, he made his way further down the hallway, whispering now again to the turtle in his arms, "I shall protect you, fair maiden!" All he was missing was the armour and a sword and he could have been Enzio's apparent 'knight in shining armour' right down to the glistening metal and dramatically wind-blown hair once the helmet was removed.
Turning a corner, Xanxus still whispered what he considered to be 'sweet nothings' in where he estimated Enzio's ears were.
SPLASH.
There seemed to be a leak in the plumbing somewhere. Amazing for such a well-kept estate like this one.
Enzio wiggled his way out the Varia leader's well-meaning arms and stumbled onto the floor, making a bee-line for the water in slow-motion like the turtle he was. He had almost made it - almost, but not quite - when Xanxus picked him back up, baby-talking him with a simply put, "Who's a bad boy? Huh? Who's a baaaaaaaad boy?" If Enzio had been human, he would have gagged for the both of them.
It seemed that whatever had changed Xanxus mentally also affected his co-ordination somewhat. The puddle of water soon managed to make him slip, squealing in a rather unmanly way and land flat on his face, now sopping wet. But all he cared about was his Enzio, Enzio, Enzio...
Enzio was nothing short of excited to escape to his watery retreat and basked in the cool, refreshing puddle for as long as he could. It didn't take long for his size to start expanding, for his aggression to turn more severe, nor did it take him long to turn on the new lovey-dovey Xanxus with bared jaws waiting to snap something in half.
All the Varia leader could do was watch, eyes widened in something akin to shoujo-style horror as his little companion grew until he was ... not so little anymore.
"E-Enzio-chan?"
With a roar and another snap of its jaws, the turtle launched his rather large body at the unsuspecting - all right, maybe he had expected the attack - Xanxus who took an instinctive step backwards, out of the way.
Falling ever-so-ungracefully on his backside, he desperately tried to reason with his new object of affection. "P-Please, Enzio-chan!"
Then the second pinch came, and once again the strange sensation assaulted him and it seemed that Xanxus was suddenly back to normal again.
"That was a close one, wasn't it, kiddo?" remarked Shamal with half-lidded eyes directed at the 'kiddo' on the floor and an all too smug grin directed at the same person. "Next time be more careful who you point a gun at." Then, without further ado, he was off down the hall before either Enzio or Xanxus could rip him a new one.
"... That's. It," came the deadly voice from behind him, "Fucking trash, you're going to die." And with that, all hell broke loose, bullets flying everywhere.
~
Watching his precious Tenth leave, arm in arm with Kyoko, Gokudera could only sigh as he watched everyone else in the room leave. It seemed that tonight everyone was leaving in someone's arms.
He felt lonely like this, unwanted and clearly destined to be alone forever more. Everyone was departing so quickly and with company already planned out for the evening, and yet he had no one. "Oho, what's a matter, little Gokudera-chan?" That voice, Gokudera glanced towards it with a scowl and then hung his head, muttering out an annoyed, "Nothing."
Wait a minute - Gokuedera-chan? Before he even laid eyes on the owner of the voice, he knew who it belonged to. Wincing inwardly, he put all his willpower into not pulling out any dynamite - just out of annoyance.
His fingers still twitched in want, though, a want to badly pull out a stick of dynamite, especially after Lussuria more or less cooed, "Aww, don't be like that Gokudera-chan. I'm your shoulder to cry on!" The Varia Sun made a great show of pointing out the leaving couples and then to his own lonely side. "Alas, I have no one either, you poor thing."
The silver-haired man stared at the other like he was insane, "Wh-What the hell are you talking about?" The stutter wasn't meant to be there, but unfortunately it still came out, disbelief colouring his voice.
The flamboyant man before Gokudera simply shrugged with a telling grin before leaning forward and invading the youth's space. "How about I show little Gokudera-chan instead?"
Opening his mouth to decline, the Storm Guardian paused. But if everyone else had someone … Why couldn't he? As soon as the thought crossed his mind, he openly gaped, amazed that he had even thought of something like that.
"What's going on in that mind of yours?" teased Lussuria, tapping the side of the younger man's head before instantly retracting his hand with a small pout since a slap had answered him instead of the agreeable 'sure' he had wanted. A growl accompanied the anger as well and he realized this was going to take some work. "My, my, no need to be mean."
Gokudera growled, even more annoyed at the fact that the room was close to empty and he was left standing stupidly, smack in the middle of it. Even that baseball idiot had gone off with someone, and that small internal battle that had been happening for the past few minutes was eventually won. "F-Fine..."
Happy beyond words, Lussuria looped an arm around slim shoulders and hugged the boy tightly to his chest. "Your type is all right as well! Hmmm, not as well suited for me as Ryohei-chan, but I don't mind such a lithe, scrawny build once in a while," he continued to drawl with shaded eyes scoping out the Storm Guardian rather shamelessly since they were well-hidden from view.
"H-Hey! Don't fucking push it!" he exclaimed into a mouthful of fabric and a rather ... feminine smell of some sort? Unwilling as he seemed, he was soon dragged out of the room - with someone, contrary to what he had first thought would happen.
This left - unfortunately - Haru, who had seemed to been forgotten by everyone. Left standing by herself in the now empty room, all she could manage was a clueless, "Hahi?”
~
"Hibari ... you actually came, did you?" remarked the blond with an ill-concealed moment of surprise.
Perhaps that wasn’t the best thing to say, as less than a split second later, a cold and unforgiving tonfa smashed into the birthday boy’s face, blows raining down relentlessly until Dino was - quite literally - a bloodied mass on the floor. This even happened so quickly and quietly in the secluded corner, no-one else realized what was going on until it was too late.
“Rest in peace, herbivore,” came the disdainful remark, before Hibari melted back into the shadows.
~
Yamamoto Takeshi took a moment to sip lightly at his wine, stifling a yawn as the time grew later, but then he heard a chime in the air and looked over to where the 'birthday boy' was clinking a knife against a crystal glass. "I'd like to thank everyone for coming," the Boss smoothly began, smiling for everyone. "And now, I'd love to open these great presents I've been given, so ..." He trailed off and leaned back against the present table with a barely noticeable flush. "We'll begin, shall we?"
Everybody visibly sat up straighter at this announcement, eyes gleaming in anticipation as one by one, a line of Dino's men carried in boxes and packages of varying sizes to the head of the table where the recipient was located. Takeshi couldn't help his jaw dropping a little, as the line just grew and grew to massive proportions, subordinates now crowding by the door for some space.
"Patience, teddy bear," came the drawl from beside him as an equally as bored-looking Belphegor looked on.
"Hm?" Takeshi closed his slightly parted mouth with a small grin taking shape. "I'm being patient, of course I am." Wrapping an arm around his lover's waist, he curled his fingers into the jacket and tugged lightly to bring the smaller body closer to his. "Dino-san sure is popular, though." The awe from seeing all those presents had yet to wear off.
The presents did not have to wait long as one by one they were opened, bright wrapping paper discarded on the floor as Dino - expression resembling one of a small child - slowly pulled the contents out, marveling at the wonders revealed to the rest of the room. All while this was happening, two men staggered inside, barely managing to squeeze perhaps the largest present into the room, the crest of the Vongola proudly stamped on one corner of the box.
"Ah, looks like ours is next," Takeshi excitedly exclaimed, leaning forward as if to better see the stage of the present-opening act. "Wait until you see!" Belphegor laughed his unmistakable laugh and watched what his 'teddy bear' was so eager about as it was slowly and methodically opened. The large box that looked as if it could have housed a small elephant revealed not an elephant, no, but rather an energetic dog that nearly bowled Dino over with its enthusiasm to be free, licking at its new master's face.
Everyone could hear Dino's laughter, punctuated by loud panting from his new pet as he toppled backwards off his chair in a rather comical fashion with a loud crash. The room erupted into laughter and applause, as if everyone had been waiting for this moment all night, and Tsuna weaved his way to the front of the room, bending down with a wide grin on his face while offering a hand out to the floored blond.
"Happy Birthday from all of us, Dino-san!"
~
"Anyway, I forgot to give you that extreme present of yours, Cavallone! Wait up!" Calling after him, though, would do no use because Dino hadn't moved yet.
"What is it, Ryohei?" When they had started to use first names, he couldn't recall, but it didn't feel as awkward as it once had - and no one seemed to object to it. The Vongola Sun Guardian smiled brightly and Dino offered an unsure one back, wondering what exactly this present was going to turn out to be. If it was as extreme as he thought, he was positive the end result wouldn't be anything too pretty.
"A toast for the extreme birthday boy!" The blond host twitched minutely at the reference to being a little boy again, but nodded and allowed the Guardian to sling an arm around his shoulders and drag him off. Not, of course, without dragging the elusive Cloud Guardian along with them. "Two Screaming Orgasms, barkeep," was ordered and Dino couldn't help but mutter out about how he didn't like drinks like that - and here he was expecting something more extreme. "Start you out extremely slow to work up the good stuff!" Ryohei corrected his thoughts before he had a chance to finish them. "And for me," Vongola's Sun declared, "I'll have a Bloody Mary!" Now why can't I have that? bemoaned the Cavallone in his mind.
Unable to refuse the drink that was pushed in front of him seconds later, Dino focused on downing it out of courtesy, throwing a slightly nervous look towards Hibari who - naturally - looked as if he wanted to murder someone. The skylark glared with pure hatred at Ryohei, who was completely oblivious and happily drinking his own alcohol perhaps a bit too fast.
This rather unseemly combination of three people drew some curious stares from the crowd as a few individuals extracted themselves from said crowd to circle and stand around them. Perhaps it wasn't the best thing to do, as Hibari obviously hated crowding. But to the surprise of everyone, all the dark haired man did was reach for his drink and start sipping.
Finishing off the alcohol by tipping back the glass and downing the rest, Hibari ordered himself a real drink if he was resigned to conversing with these pesky people. "Give me a Hit and Run," was the cool demand, already waiting impatiently for his drink that would make this night somewhat bearable if not completely. There were stronger drinks he could have ordered, but he settled for not getting shit-faced drunk at the very least. Just enough to take off the edge from the crowd that still gathered around them. Feeling the need to take revenge on the host that had brought him into this mess - yes, he was blaming Dino - he ordered before the blond could and insisted, "Give the herbivore a Hand job, will you?"
"Thanks to the extreme, Hibari," Ryohei said as he lean forwards on the counter and placed his own drink order now that his glass was empty as well. The answering scoff was only to be expected, but Ryohei didn't stop grinning as he sipped - a bit slower this time - at his new drink.
"What is this?" a soft voice came from behind the men seated at the mini-bar, a bit huskier than a normal woman's but still seductive and nonchalant as it usually always was with this woman. "Hmm, drinking this imitation crap, are we?" Dino winced as his drink was dumped onto on the floor, staining the hardwood. "No, we can't have that for the birthday boy." He had almost forgotten the Poison Scorpion was present and gulped slightly as she produced a bottle of home-brewed ale from out of no where, proceeding to pour him a glass. "Drink up."
The smile that was just beginning to creep upon Dino's face froze as soon as the bottle was produced. Perhaps it was the ... unusually purple colouring it had, or maybe just the fact that the blond had had some very bad (and unforgettable) experiences with this certain woman's cooking that made him cringe inwardly as the glass was set down in front of him. The absolutely foul smell that was coming from it only served to intensify his fear and nervousness and many people in the newly gathered crowd whispered among themselves.
"Is he actually going to drink that?"
"Oh my, I can smell it even from here!"
"D-Dino-san wouldn't actually do it, will he?"
Luckily for the poor blond, Bianchi had already turned her attention elsewhere, proceeding to pour another glass of the horrid concoction for Ryohei.
In response to the crowd and his own gag reflex, Dino dumped the drink into the nearest plant and watched - in horror, pure horror - as the petals wilted and the flower died on the spot. That poor plant had suffered a worse fate than he would have, but he still didn't think a stomachache of any sort would be pleasurable on his birthday.
"Did you enjoy it?" Bianchi was back to looking at him with unforgiving eyes, challenging him as if knowing exactly what he had just done - but not calling him on it to spare him with a hidden mercy no one knew she had. Meekly nodding his head, the assassin before him seemed momentarily appeased nonetheless and turned her attention to giving Hibari a drink as well - who had no problem with throwing it onto the floor much like the woman had done to Dino's first drink. Wincing once more in sympathy for his floor, he noticed out of the corner of his eye that Ryohei was about to take a sip of the foul liquid. Turning at once, eyes wide, he went to stop the younger man from committing suicide but ended up not having to worry because Lussuria had stepped out of the crowd, right up to his beloved 'Ryohei-chan', and had downed the ale instead. A coy lick of the lips was ruined as the Varia's Sun collapsed onto the ground, twitching and groaning and clutching uselessly at his stomach.
Hibari, meanwhile, continued to drink proper drinks until the crowd had more or less died down, finally collapsing against the only person who remained. Hooded eyes observed the person for a moment before closing - and then promptly darting open as he hastily sat up straight and willed the haze from his mind away. "You're that girl with ties to that man, are you not?"
Chrome's visible eye widened slightly at the mention of Mukuro, especially by a man like Hibari Kyoya. Mind working furiously, she struggled to come up with a reply, suddenly spared of doing just that as the other man groaned and collapsed against herself, causing her to stagger and almost fall off the small stool she had occupied for a majority of the night.
Mukuro-sama, she called mentally, slightly at loss for what to do. Mukuro-sama, do you ... need him?
A quiet 'Kufufu' was all the woman needed before heaving one of Hibari's arms over her small shoulders and then proceed to make her way out of the room.
~
Eyes clouded with sleep, Squalo managed to struggle up into a sitting position, hiding his small wince of pain by turning away. The action was unneeded, as the only other person currently in the room was Dino, who was still fast asleep.
A few ripped out hairs and bruises later, that was quickly changed as a protesting blond was unkindly kicked off his own bed by an irate swordsman.
“Che, not as co-ordinated as you were last night, are you, midget?” came Squalo’s loud voice. As soon as he voiced his thought, another one quickly popped up in his head, “Wait…” Eyes narrowed as the silver-haired man stared down at the Cavallone, still lying on the floor.
“If you were so co-ordinated last night … And none of your subordinates were around …”
--
“You ok there, Romario?” came Dino’s slightly worried voice after Squalo had stormed out, seemingly lost in thought. The first thing the blond had done when the other man left was stick his head under the bed, strangely enough. This curious action was quickly explained, as moments later, Romario removed himself from underneath the bed, hastily tidying his clothing, rumpled from what seemed like an entire night spent lying under it.
“Anything for you, boss. Anything for you.”
~
A heavy sigh resounded in the quiet room, the infirmary empty besides the single patient curled up in the blankets with a book resting in his lap. The nurse had by now retired for the evening in her office and Lussuria was bored beyond a measure of a doubt. “If only Ryohei-chan were here,” the Varia member lamented to pale walls and lifeless plants. “I’m so terribly bored~”
“Ask and you shall receive. To the extreme!” The door to the infirmary banged open without heed to the patients - or sole patient, in this case - and the Vongola Sun Guardian raced inside. “I heard you were extremely ill so I tried to get here as fast as I could! But the extreme party … was hard to get away from.” Even knowing full well that it was more a good fight Ryohei was after, a worthy opponent like no other, that didn’t stop Lussuria from seeing it in a different light.
“My, my, so Ryohei-chan was worried about me, then?” He clasped his hands together in front of his chest, feigning a love-struck pose before laughing and waving the younger man off. “No need to worry, you silly little boy, I’m just fine. That sly Poison Scorpion just happened to get the better of me this time. But I am glad it wasn’t you that was hurt, dearest Ryohei-chan~” A rough hand settled on his shoulder and Lussuria felt himself sink a tad lower in the bed due to the force behind it. It didn’t bother him, though, and he didn’t brush off the well-meaning hand.
“Still! That was extremely supposed to be me, Lussuria-san!” The Vongola’s Sun had always been so clueless and naïve - and the Varia member was not above using that against the youth for his own personal gain. Deciding to indeed use this to his advantage, he was about to suggest a way Ryohei could make things ‘even’ between them, but the door that was still wide-open emitted another guest to the infirmary and he paused mid-sentence with the invitation.
Both Sun Guardians regarded the boy in the door with two very different expressions. One annoyed and the other clearly happy to see a fellow Family member. “Ah, if it isn’t Fuuta-chan.” Lussuria’s annoyance slipped away, though, as another idea replaced it. “Oho, would Fuuta-chan be interested in playing a fun little game with me and Ryohei-chan?”
The boy, that was really a young man in the making, wheezed out a ‘hold on’ as he panted to catch his breath. When he had finally found it, he straightened from his hands-on-knees position and modestly blushed as he saw the look the Varia member was giving him. “U-Um, Lussuria-nii means …”
“Yes, that’s right. Fuuta-chan is so smart,” praised the flamboyant man to the youth. “Why is Fuuta-chan here, though, I wonder~”
It was an open-ended question that was more of a statement, but Fuuta answered anyway, blush dying down as he realized this was just Lussuria’s way of teasing - his own brand of special humor. “Tsuna-nii asked me to make sure you were okay.”
“As you can see,” purred the Varia’s Sun, “I’m just fine now. But if Fuuta-chan wants …” It was trailed off with a slowly spreading grin that spoke for what words could not.
Fuuta’s previous blush flared back into life and the boy hastily left to report back to Tsuna while Ryohei, off to the side and having been remarkably quiet, wondered aloud, “What was that about to the extreme, Lussuria-san?” Lussuria offered to explain with actions rather than those ever unneeded words.
~
“Mooooommy, daaaaaaddy!” A little blond boy bounced on the spot, eager eyes glued onto the kitchen door. “Is it cake time, isitisitisit?” He tripped over his own two feet, but his father’s hand steadied him on the spot before he could fall face-first to the floor.
“It sure is, son,” remarked the Cavallone Don, motioning for his wife to alert the chef that it was time. He would be six today, Dino Cavallone, and he was bursting with joy at the prospect of getting a real cake this year - a real one. The little boy was sadly disappointed when the chef instead brought out a small cupcake - the usual traditional, because apparently the Cavallone thought it was inappropriate to throw grand parties until the double digits. The only part he could even consider remotely acceptable about this was there was a cowboy on it and the chef, being the kind woman she was, had placed a hat of the same making on his head.
Needless to say, Dino went around pretending to be a cowboy for the rest of the afternoon. Just to spite his parents, really, but it was fun nevertheless.
--REVIEW TIMEZ--
Let's go over what we learned today, shall we?
1.) Xanxus is a super-man in disguise.
2.) Prince and I are unbelievably selfish. AND HAVE DEATH WISHES.
3.) I wonder, though, did a certain someone catch the use of 'Kiri'? Clue: anagram.
--
Teenagers were indeed teenagers and no sooner had the party reached full swing did two of them sneak off together, the stuffy event being more than they could handle for hours on end. Hand in hand, Lambo led his date for the evening out into the bustling streets of Italy, laughing and smiling and having a fun time now that they weren’t cooped up for the evening. He held on to her and she held back, proving he wasn’t alone and wouldn’t have to be - not without due cause, and they both hoped that day was long in coming. For his part, Lambo still couldn’t get over how beautiful she looked in her oriental-styled clothing, bright but muted colors accenting her eyes and her face and her slim body that he had admired long before this night. A braided bun atop her head completed the look and she could have been a model straight from a magazine if it wasn’t for those fighting skills she had no trouble showing off when two men tried to harass them in an abandoned alley.
Hours later and they ended up on the weathered roof of an old, vacant hotel to watch the sun rise together, Lambo holding her tight to his body to keep her warm. And, in a way, reassure her that they were in this together - this being the world they had been raised in and the world they would continue to grow in. It was comforting to have someone to share the burden with at the end of the day and he was lucky his shoulder to lean on was stronger than his because if his resolve weakened she would be there to change that. She had his back, as much as he had hers. People may have called him weak, a pest, and unneeded. But he wasn’t the Vongola Thunder Guardian for no good reason. He would show them, if the occasion called for it, what a real Guardian could do. Nothing would stop that resolve, because he could tolerate - had tolerated for years, this pain, and this life, this everything. I-Pin had been the only one who had seen him change throughout the long years, though. He placed his trust in her; just like she did - without fail - in return.
~
"I'm so ... I'm so sorry, Squalo. Hold still, hold still! Let me see!" Dino fought with the swordsman for a few minutes until the man gave up and held out his hand for inspection. Four deep marks from the fork marred the skin of the only real hand Squalo possessed. Wincing in sympathy, he brought the hand to his lips and kissed the wounds, eyes fluttering shut as a tongue snaked out to clean away the blood just as he had done to the icing earlier. "I'm sorry," he said one last time, opening his eyes to show his apology was completely sincere and further tugging the Varia's Rain closer to him to place a light kiss to protesting lips. "Let me make it all better," he mumbled into the clumsy kiss, a change from the more experienced ones he had been giving. Squalo was pushing at his shoulders already, wishing to pin him down, but he smirked into the kiss as well this time and pushed back. "That just won't do. No, no, no." And with each 'no', he punctuated it with a feather-light press of lips to an exposed neck, already relishing in the control he was being giving once more, no matter how unwillingly.
“Vooooi, f-fucking brat,” was gritted out with a glare, Squalo clearly unused to the reversal of roles. “Don’t think I’d do this for just any fucking brat either,” he managed to say before lips once more silenced him, hands working to unbutton the dress shirt that had been hidden under the swordsman’s earlier coat. Gasping for breath a few seconds later, the job was half-way done when Dino realized cold steel was at his throat again, the blade threatening to sink deeper into his skin.
Pushing it away with nothing more than his index finger, Dino muttered out an annoyed, “You’re going to have to get rid of that thing. It’s going to get in the way.”
Surprisingly his request was answered as the sword was tossed aside from its once hold on the mechanical arm of the swordsman. His surprise wasn’t long-lived for that very same hand tightly gripped his jaw, metal holding no warmth for his skin at all and instead sapping what heat he gave off through its chilling presence. He shivered instinctively; he had never gotten use to that hand, never understand why Squalo had needed to cut it off in the first place. Their first fight had been over that hand and it would forever be a reminder of how far they had come, how many times they had fought and hated one another only to end up like this time and time again. It made no sense, yet neither of them wanted it to end, even if they were all too aware of what would happen if they continued on like this.
Frustrated, Dino knocked that hand away from him, wincing in the end since that had hurt a bit more than he had expected. A chuckle from the swordsman gave him pause for all of a moment before he took at his frustration out on an unsuspecting Squalo by slamming his forehead against the other’s much like his tutor would have done to a certain rival. “You’re so … so you,” he struggled to say, wanting badly to swear but knowing that wouldn’t have done any good either way he looked it. “Can’t you just … for once not be?”
“Vooooi, fucking brat,” Squalo repeated, propping himself up on his elbows as the blond continued to straddle his lap. “You know that wouldn’t work.” Reluctantly, Dino agreed. That intolerability that was purely one of Squalo’s engrained traits was one of the qualities that had first drawn the Cavallone heir in, wanting to get under the other’s skin and learn what really made the swordsman tick. He may not have liked what he saw, but that somehow had led to him wanting to change that person, even if he knew that same person didn’t want to be changed. “Now where were we, fucking brat,” lazily drawled Squalo, tugging at the back of Dino’s neck with a hand. “Don’t stop what you’ve started, shithead. I’ll kill you.”
Shaking his head to clear it, Dino gave him the expected grin before giving up on making sense of what Squalo was to him these days. One minute they were enemies fighting at one another’s throat and next they were more attached than two newlyweds on a honeymoon. It confused him endlessly, but …
Strangely he wouldn’t have it any other way.
~
Fwump.
A figure landed on the ground in a tangle of flailing arms and blankets, a loud groan following seconds after as Yamamoto Takeshi stuck his head out from the mess of limbs and fabric, blinking sleep out of his eyes.
“… What are you doing, waking up the prince so early?” came an irritated voice from above. Rubbing the back of his head in a style reminiscent of himself a few years back, the baseball player grinned up at the other person on the bed he was on moments ago.
“Ahahaha … Sorry, sorry,” he was quick to make amends as he extracted himself from the blankets and picked them up, dark eyes gleaming with amusement as he smiled at a rather disgruntled blonde genius. Belphegor’s usual grin was absent, a light frown decorating his features as he looked pointedly at the bundle of blankets in the other man’s arms. It was still early morning, and the frosty air from the previous night still lingered in the air so it was only natural for him to feel cold, even colder seeing as he was currently naked without anything clothing nearby to reach for. Thankfully, the blankets were soon deposited on the large bed and the prince, grateful for some warmth, stretched out his hands without looking to grab them. His hand didn’t touch fabric though, instead closing around the wrist of his startled lover, instinctively jerking the other man forwards to land face-first on the bed.
Slightly startled himself (though he’d probably never admit it), Bel stared at the messy black hair in front of him, “Ushishishi, aren’t we eager today? Waking me up this early,” his laughter rang through the calm silence, “Didn’t we get enough last night?”
Yamamoto’s laughter joined the blond’s as he sat up, looking happily at his companion before leaning down to place a light kiss on Bel’s nose.
“Well it has been three months; you can’t blame me for being eager.”
~
“Oya, oya, what have we got here, hm?”
That was the first thing Hibari heard as he was woken from his slumber. And there was obviously something wrong, seeing as it came from right beside him. A split second later, the skylark’s eyes shot open and he was instinctively reaching for his tonfas. Unfortunately for him, said tonfas did not seem to be in their usual place beside his bed, leaving his hands grasping at nothing but cold air.
“Kufufu. You’re not planning to attack me after … all we did last night, are you?” That definitely stopped him in his tracks. Since when did bitter rivals - even if they were fellow Guardians - end up in the same room, the same bed together? Fate seemed to really hate Hibari today, as he was suddenly assaulted by a pounding headache, courtesy of all the (unwilling) drinking he was forced into doing the previous night at the party. Refusing to turn around and meet the gaze of the person beside him - quite obviously Mukuro, of course - he focused on shutting out the pain and thinking back to how the hell something like that could have happened. Even more unfortunately for the Cloud, the pain between his legs also decided to flare up, further worsening his mood, if that were possible. Without warning, a pair of arms encircled his waist; pulling him flush against perhaps the person he hated the most in the world at the moment.
“… You’re dead,” was all Hibari could manage, still fighting to sort out his thoughts and fish up the previous night’s events. His memory also had decided to play up; coupled with the large hangover he had, destroying his already very short patience in one blow.
The other man’s laugh echoed mockingly through the empty room. “But wasn’t it so courteous of you, poor little Hibari, to collapse on my dear Chrome-chan last night? She even decided to bring you all the way back here and spare you spending a night all alone in the party room.” That triggered something in black-haired man’s brain and the events the occurred after slowly made their way out from the still groggy part of his mind. Collapsing against Chrome, somehow making it back to her room and the woman - also close to passing out from the effort - suddenly transforming to be replaced by … That man. Always being one to take advantage of a weakened opponent, Mukuro had of course, taken the chance of ... toying with Hibari while he was in his half-unconscious state.
And that’s where his thoughts returned to the current situation. The morning after the party, stuck in bed with the one, the only Rokudo Mukuro.
“Kufufu … Don’t be thinking I’ll let you go anytime soon, my little Kyoya-chan…”
~
The dining room seemed unusually empty that morning. Well, perhaps not that unusual seeing as it was the morning after a huge party. People were bound to be ... occupied on days like this. None of this really concerned Reborn though, as he strolled into the quiet room. It seemed that the only other person in the room was currently occupied with his breakfast, back turned, mouth working furiously on chewing. This person also happened to be Colonello. And this certain blond was certainly unaware of his so-called 'rival' that had just walked in. No, this morning was not going to be quiet at all.
This point was further proven as Colonello turned to see who had entered the kitchen as well, shoving a spoonful of cereal into his awaiting mouth. Around the cereal, he commented without any real vindication just yet, "You're up early, hey." He figured a stand-still in their earlier fight would be better suited for this earlier morning hour, but that smug little smirk from Reborn made him reconsider that - ready to take it back in an instant. "Oi, don't just stand there and watch, you bastard. Pull up a seat, hey!" He had long swallowed his cereal and took another spoonful, mostly to prevent his self from saying more. Also, it gave him something to do with his hands rather than grabbing for the machine gun always on his back - no matter what he was wearing, which happened to be nothing more than a light, camo-printed shirt and boxers due to not wanting to get dressed just yet.
The smirk only grew as the dark-haired man approached the table, "Didn't your parents teach you any respect, talking with your mouth full like that?" he replied, the words 'Good Morning' obviously non-existent in his vocabulary. This served to grate on Colonello's nerves, and with a few more well-placed taunts, the expert hitman had all but driven him crazy.
Cereal now forgotten, the blond slammed his foot down, almost jumping across the table, machine gun clutched tightly in his hands, "What the hell do you want, hey?"
"Nothing but to eat my breakfast in peace," came the smooth reply, as Reborn brought a cup of freshly ground coffee to his lips, "Without anyone breaking any tables, especially one belonging to our gracious host."
Before a single shot could be fired by the rowdy blond, Reborn had already placed his coffee back down onto the table and pressed a cocked gun to the Spartan's temple in an unforgiving manner. "Now, now. Learn some respect and I might take you seriously," drawled the hitman, finger calmly pressing against the trigger as if to really pull it and finally end this charade. Rolling his eyes when he noticed the sweat slowly starting to build on Colonello's brow, he eased up, clicking the safety back into place and quirking an amused eyebrow. "Do you think I'd kill my entertainment value?" As the blond went to retaliate with his own gun rather than words, Reborn firmly gripped the other's wrist to stop further movements. Then twisting the arm backwards, he pressed it into a tensed back and leaned his head down to taunt near an ear. "So slow. No wonder no one takes you seriously, hm?"
Dino, dressed only in a robe and yawning widely, stepped into the kitchen and took one quick look around before doing an abrupt about-face and marching right back out. "Whoops, don't mind me." Colonello's outrage was heard throughout the Manor without further ado.
-- OMAKES --
Xanxus stormed out of the room, glaring pure murder at anyone who even dared to get in his way.
"Xanxus suuuuure looks angry," a lazy voice drawled, the occupant of it leaning casually back against the wall and observing the Varia Boss with something akin to open-admiration if the man hadn't been so completely bored. "Leave him alone," another advised, fidgeting on the spot, "we don't want to start any trouble."
Fuming too much to listen too carefully to the passing comment, the dark-haired man stepped briskly into the brightly lit corridors, door swinging shut behind him, immediately cutting the amount of noise down. "Fucking trash," he muttered to himself, blindly turning the first corner he came to.
The man who had spoken before, though, the one who had been bypassed as if he wasn't even there, curiously followed after the furious leader - but mostly because he had noticed a certain beauty conveniently by the punch bowl near the doorway, pouring herself something to drink. Bianchi looked as striking as always and Shamal doubted he would pass up any chance to win her over. However, when he arrived, she was gone and he was left standing there with the still building curiosity to know what had annoyed that spoiled brat of a Varia Boss. Having nothing better to do, he followed Xanxus out into the hallway, keeping to the shadows before laughing and ruining the image of a perfect assassin by stepping out into plain sight behind the man. "Oi, kiddo, what's this tantrum all about?"
Whirling around instinctively, the 'kiddo' already had a gun out, pointing it directly at the doctor's face with a thunderous expression. "What the fuck do you think you're doing, following me?"
"Oho," the man held up his hands defensively with a smirk, "I just thought I'd see what's a matter with our dear Xanxus, no?"
The man's expression was stony, red eyes focused angrily on Shamal's own. "If you're just here for entertainment, fucking leave before I kill you."
"Nothing of the sort," amended the doctor who would have preferred, to be completely honest and all that, to be talking to a beautiful lady instead of a brat with more baggage with him than a tourist on holiday. "I'm being polite," he mentioned off-handedly, shoving his hands into the pockets of his slacks and shrugging with the usual indifference. "Don't mind me, go ahead and rampage away."
"Che," spat Xanxus disdainfully as he stepped closer to Shamal, gun still raised, "So you do have a death wish, don't you?" Seconds away from pulling the trigger, a sudden crashing noise was heard from a room, its door ajar mere steps away from the pair. Shamal managed to crane his neck back, surprised to see not a person, but rather a ... turtle?
Seeing the opportunity for what it was, an idea springing to mind, Shamal released a trident mosquito from hiding with well-timed precision and hid his grin by turning his head properly to see the creature - completely disregarding the gun as he commented lightly, "Seems we have a little friend who's lost." Enzio, on the floor and scuttling ever closer with slow movements, looked remarkably innocent considering his otherwise man-eating ways.
Caught slightly off guard (though he'd never admit it), Xanxus failed to notice the mosquito before it was too late. A light pinch on the side of his neck later, the Varia boss had a sudden dizzy spell, all while feeling a remarkable change happen inside himself.
Shamal, smug in his victory, sauntered away, but not before bending and patting the turtle happily on the back. "Good luck, little fellow.”
Xanxus didn't like this unusual feeling, he hated it. But all rage was washed away when he laid eyes on the clueless turtle that had waddled its way out into the corridor in front of him.
The turtle looked up at him and the only thing Xanxus could do was clasp his hands together - completely reluctant, mind you, but his body seemed to have a mind of its own - and, in a scary and remarkably similar voice to Lussuria, cooed out a small, "Aren't you just the cuteness thing?" He could have gagged.
The keyword being 'could.' Unfortunately for him, the strange behaviour did not stop there, and the next thing he knew he had picked up Enzio in a swish of dark fabric - similar to those dark and enigmatic superheroes - with a light blush dusting his usually stoic face.
Continuing on with his uniquely Xanxus-man - X-man for sort - poses, he made his way further down the hallway, whispering now again to the turtle in his arms, "I shall protect you, fair maiden!" All he was missing was the armour and a sword and he could have been Enzio's apparent 'knight in shining armour' right down to the glistening metal and dramatically wind-blown hair once the helmet was removed.
Turning a corner, Xanxus still whispered what he considered to be 'sweet nothings' in where he estimated Enzio's ears were.
SPLASH.
There seemed to be a leak in the plumbing somewhere. Amazing for such a well-kept estate like this one.
Enzio wiggled his way out the Varia leader's well-meaning arms and stumbled onto the floor, making a bee-line for the water in slow-motion like the turtle he was. He had almost made it - almost, but not quite - when Xanxus picked him back up, baby-talking him with a simply put, "Who's a bad boy? Huh? Who's a baaaaaaaad boy?" If Enzio had been human, he would have gagged for the both of them.
It seemed that whatever had changed Xanxus mentally also affected his co-ordination somewhat. The puddle of water soon managed to make him slip, squealing in a rather unmanly way and land flat on his face, now sopping wet. But all he cared about was his Enzio, Enzio, Enzio...
Enzio was nothing short of excited to escape to his watery retreat and basked in the cool, refreshing puddle for as long as he could. It didn't take long for his size to start expanding, for his aggression to turn more severe, nor did it take him long to turn on the new lovey-dovey Xanxus with bared jaws waiting to snap something in half.
All the Varia leader could do was watch, eyes widened in something akin to shoujo-style horror as his little companion grew until he was ... not so little anymore.
"E-Enzio-chan?"
With a roar and another snap of its jaws, the turtle launched his rather large body at the unsuspecting - all right, maybe he had expected the attack - Xanxus who took an instinctive step backwards, out of the way.
Falling ever-so-ungracefully on his backside, he desperately tried to reason with his new object of affection. "P-Please, Enzio-chan!"
Then the second pinch came, and once again the strange sensation assaulted him and it seemed that Xanxus was suddenly back to normal again.
"That was a close one, wasn't it, kiddo?" remarked Shamal with half-lidded eyes directed at the 'kiddo' on the floor and an all too smug grin directed at the same person. "Next time be more careful who you point a gun at." Then, without further ado, he was off down the hall before either Enzio or Xanxus could rip him a new one.
"... That's. It," came the deadly voice from behind him, "Fucking trash, you're going to die." And with that, all hell broke loose, bullets flying everywhere.
~
Watching his precious Tenth leave, arm in arm with Kyoko, Gokudera could only sigh as he watched everyone else in the room leave. It seemed that tonight everyone was leaving in someone's arms.
He felt lonely like this, unwanted and clearly destined to be alone forever more. Everyone was departing so quickly and with company already planned out for the evening, and yet he had no one. "Oho, what's a matter, little Gokudera-chan?" That voice, Gokudera glanced towards it with a scowl and then hung his head, muttering out an annoyed, "Nothing."
Wait a minute - Gokuedera-chan? Before he even laid eyes on the owner of the voice, he knew who it belonged to. Wincing inwardly, he put all his willpower into not pulling out any dynamite - just out of annoyance.
His fingers still twitched in want, though, a want to badly pull out a stick of dynamite, especially after Lussuria more or less cooed, "Aww, don't be like that Gokudera-chan. I'm your shoulder to cry on!" The Varia Sun made a great show of pointing out the leaving couples and then to his own lonely side. "Alas, I have no one either, you poor thing."
The silver-haired man stared at the other like he was insane, "Wh-What the hell are you talking about?" The stutter wasn't meant to be there, but unfortunately it still came out, disbelief colouring his voice.
The flamboyant man before Gokudera simply shrugged with a telling grin before leaning forward and invading the youth's space. "How about I show little Gokudera-chan instead?"
Opening his mouth to decline, the Storm Guardian paused. But if everyone else had someone … Why couldn't he? As soon as the thought crossed his mind, he openly gaped, amazed that he had even thought of something like that.
"What's going on in that mind of yours?" teased Lussuria, tapping the side of the younger man's head before instantly retracting his hand with a small pout since a slap had answered him instead of the agreeable 'sure' he had wanted. A growl accompanied the anger as well and he realized this was going to take some work. "My, my, no need to be mean."
Gokudera growled, even more annoyed at the fact that the room was close to empty and he was left standing stupidly, smack in the middle of it. Even that baseball idiot had gone off with someone, and that small internal battle that had been happening for the past few minutes was eventually won. "F-Fine..."
Happy beyond words, Lussuria looped an arm around slim shoulders and hugged the boy tightly to his chest. "Your type is all right as well! Hmmm, not as well suited for me as Ryohei-chan, but I don't mind such a lithe, scrawny build once in a while," he continued to drawl with shaded eyes scoping out the Storm Guardian rather shamelessly since they were well-hidden from view.
"H-Hey! Don't fucking push it!" he exclaimed into a mouthful of fabric and a rather ... feminine smell of some sort? Unwilling as he seemed, he was soon dragged out of the room - with someone, contrary to what he had first thought would happen.
This left - unfortunately - Haru, who had seemed to been forgotten by everyone. Left standing by herself in the now empty room, all she could manage was a clueless, "Hahi?”
~
"Hibari ... you actually came, did you?" remarked the blond with an ill-concealed moment of surprise.
Perhaps that wasn’t the best thing to say, as less than a split second later, a cold and unforgiving tonfa smashed into the birthday boy’s face, blows raining down relentlessly until Dino was - quite literally - a bloodied mass on the floor. This even happened so quickly and quietly in the secluded corner, no-one else realized what was going on until it was too late.
“Rest in peace, herbivore,” came the disdainful remark, before Hibari melted back into the shadows.
~
Yamamoto Takeshi took a moment to sip lightly at his wine, stifling a yawn as the time grew later, but then he heard a chime in the air and looked over to where the 'birthday boy' was clinking a knife against a crystal glass. "I'd like to thank everyone for coming," the Boss smoothly began, smiling for everyone. "And now, I'd love to open these great presents I've been given, so ..." He trailed off and leaned back against the present table with a barely noticeable flush. "We'll begin, shall we?"
Everybody visibly sat up straighter at this announcement, eyes gleaming in anticipation as one by one, a line of Dino's men carried in boxes and packages of varying sizes to the head of the table where the recipient was located. Takeshi couldn't help his jaw dropping a little, as the line just grew and grew to massive proportions, subordinates now crowding by the door for some space.
"Patience, teddy bear," came the drawl from beside him as an equally as bored-looking Belphegor looked on.
"Hm?" Takeshi closed his slightly parted mouth with a small grin taking shape. "I'm being patient, of course I am." Wrapping an arm around his lover's waist, he curled his fingers into the jacket and tugged lightly to bring the smaller body closer to his. "Dino-san sure is popular, though." The awe from seeing all those presents had yet to wear off.
The presents did not have to wait long as one by one they were opened, bright wrapping paper discarded on the floor as Dino - expression resembling one of a small child - slowly pulled the contents out, marveling at the wonders revealed to the rest of the room. All while this was happening, two men staggered inside, barely managing to squeeze perhaps the largest present into the room, the crest of the Vongola proudly stamped on one corner of the box.
"Ah, looks like ours is next," Takeshi excitedly exclaimed, leaning forward as if to better see the stage of the present-opening act. "Wait until you see!" Belphegor laughed his unmistakable laugh and watched what his 'teddy bear' was so eager about as it was slowly and methodically opened. The large box that looked as if it could have housed a small elephant revealed not an elephant, no, but rather an energetic dog that nearly bowled Dino over with its enthusiasm to be free, licking at its new master's face.
Everyone could hear Dino's laughter, punctuated by loud panting from his new pet as he toppled backwards off his chair in a rather comical fashion with a loud crash. The room erupted into laughter and applause, as if everyone had been waiting for this moment all night, and Tsuna weaved his way to the front of the room, bending down with a wide grin on his face while offering a hand out to the floored blond.
"Happy Birthday from all of us, Dino-san!"
~
"Anyway, I forgot to give you that extreme present of yours, Cavallone! Wait up!" Calling after him, though, would do no use because Dino hadn't moved yet.
"What is it, Ryohei?" When they had started to use first names, he couldn't recall, but it didn't feel as awkward as it once had - and no one seemed to object to it. The Vongola Sun Guardian smiled brightly and Dino offered an unsure one back, wondering what exactly this present was going to turn out to be. If it was as extreme as he thought, he was positive the end result wouldn't be anything too pretty.
"A toast for the extreme birthday boy!" The blond host twitched minutely at the reference to being a little boy again, but nodded and allowed the Guardian to sling an arm around his shoulders and drag him off. Not, of course, without dragging the elusive Cloud Guardian along with them. "Two Screaming Orgasms, barkeep," was ordered and Dino couldn't help but mutter out about how he didn't like drinks like that - and here he was expecting something more extreme. "Start you out extremely slow to work up the good stuff!" Ryohei corrected his thoughts before he had a chance to finish them. "And for me," Vongola's Sun declared, "I'll have a Bloody Mary!" Now why can't I have that? bemoaned the Cavallone in his mind.
Unable to refuse the drink that was pushed in front of him seconds later, Dino focused on downing it out of courtesy, throwing a slightly nervous look towards Hibari who - naturally - looked as if he wanted to murder someone. The skylark glared with pure hatred at Ryohei, who was completely oblivious and happily drinking his own alcohol perhaps a bit too fast.
This rather unseemly combination of three people drew some curious stares from the crowd as a few individuals extracted themselves from said crowd to circle and stand around them. Perhaps it wasn't the best thing to do, as Hibari obviously hated crowding. But to the surprise of everyone, all the dark haired man did was reach for his drink and start sipping.
Finishing off the alcohol by tipping back the glass and downing the rest, Hibari ordered himself a real drink if he was resigned to conversing with these pesky people. "Give me a Hit and Run," was the cool demand, already waiting impatiently for his drink that would make this night somewhat bearable if not completely. There were stronger drinks he could have ordered, but he settled for not getting shit-faced drunk at the very least. Just enough to take off the edge from the crowd that still gathered around them. Feeling the need to take revenge on the host that had brought him into this mess - yes, he was blaming Dino - he ordered before the blond could and insisted, "Give the herbivore a Hand job, will you?"
"Thanks to the extreme, Hibari," Ryohei said as he lean forwards on the counter and placed his own drink order now that his glass was empty as well. The answering scoff was only to be expected, but Ryohei didn't stop grinning as he sipped - a bit slower this time - at his new drink.
"What is this?" a soft voice came from behind the men seated at the mini-bar, a bit huskier than a normal woman's but still seductive and nonchalant as it usually always was with this woman. "Hmm, drinking this imitation crap, are we?" Dino winced as his drink was dumped onto on the floor, staining the hardwood. "No, we can't have that for the birthday boy." He had almost forgotten the Poison Scorpion was present and gulped slightly as she produced a bottle of home-brewed ale from out of no where, proceeding to pour him a glass. "Drink up."
The smile that was just beginning to creep upon Dino's face froze as soon as the bottle was produced. Perhaps it was the ... unusually purple colouring it had, or maybe just the fact that the blond had had some very bad (and unforgettable) experiences with this certain woman's cooking that made him cringe inwardly as the glass was set down in front of him. The absolutely foul smell that was coming from it only served to intensify his fear and nervousness and many people in the newly gathered crowd whispered among themselves.
"Is he actually going to drink that?"
"Oh my, I can smell it even from here!"
"D-Dino-san wouldn't actually do it, will he?"
Luckily for the poor blond, Bianchi had already turned her attention elsewhere, proceeding to pour another glass of the horrid concoction for Ryohei.
In response to the crowd and his own gag reflex, Dino dumped the drink into the nearest plant and watched - in horror, pure horror - as the petals wilted and the flower died on the spot. That poor plant had suffered a worse fate than he would have, but he still didn't think a stomachache of any sort would be pleasurable on his birthday.
"Did you enjoy it?" Bianchi was back to looking at him with unforgiving eyes, challenging him as if knowing exactly what he had just done - but not calling him on it to spare him with a hidden mercy no one knew she had. Meekly nodding his head, the assassin before him seemed momentarily appeased nonetheless and turned her attention to giving Hibari a drink as well - who had no problem with throwing it onto the floor much like the woman had done to Dino's first drink. Wincing once more in sympathy for his floor, he noticed out of the corner of his eye that Ryohei was about to take a sip of the foul liquid. Turning at once, eyes wide, he went to stop the younger man from committing suicide but ended up not having to worry because Lussuria had stepped out of the crowd, right up to his beloved 'Ryohei-chan', and had downed the ale instead. A coy lick of the lips was ruined as the Varia's Sun collapsed onto the ground, twitching and groaning and clutching uselessly at his stomach.
Hibari, meanwhile, continued to drink proper drinks until the crowd had more or less died down, finally collapsing against the only person who remained. Hooded eyes observed the person for a moment before closing - and then promptly darting open as he hastily sat up straight and willed the haze from his mind away. "You're that girl with ties to that man, are you not?"
Chrome's visible eye widened slightly at the mention of Mukuro, especially by a man like Hibari Kyoya. Mind working furiously, she struggled to come up with a reply, suddenly spared of doing just that as the other man groaned and collapsed against herself, causing her to stagger and almost fall off the small stool she had occupied for a majority of the night.
Mukuro-sama, she called mentally, slightly at loss for what to do. Mukuro-sama, do you ... need him?
A quiet 'Kufufu' was all the woman needed before heaving one of Hibari's arms over her small shoulders and then proceed to make her way out of the room.
~
Eyes clouded with sleep, Squalo managed to struggle up into a sitting position, hiding his small wince of pain by turning away. The action was unneeded, as the only other person currently in the room was Dino, who was still fast asleep.
A few ripped out hairs and bruises later, that was quickly changed as a protesting blond was unkindly kicked off his own bed by an irate swordsman.
“Che, not as co-ordinated as you were last night, are you, midget?” came Squalo’s loud voice. As soon as he voiced his thought, another one quickly popped up in his head, “Wait…” Eyes narrowed as the silver-haired man stared down at the Cavallone, still lying on the floor.
“If you were so co-ordinated last night … And none of your subordinates were around …”
--
“You ok there, Romario?” came Dino’s slightly worried voice after Squalo had stormed out, seemingly lost in thought. The first thing the blond had done when the other man left was stick his head under the bed, strangely enough. This curious action was quickly explained, as moments later, Romario removed himself from underneath the bed, hastily tidying his clothing, rumpled from what seemed like an entire night spent lying under it.
“Anything for you, boss. Anything for you.”
~
A heavy sigh resounded in the quiet room, the infirmary empty besides the single patient curled up in the blankets with a book resting in his lap. The nurse had by now retired for the evening in her office and Lussuria was bored beyond a measure of a doubt. “If only Ryohei-chan were here,” the Varia member lamented to pale walls and lifeless plants. “I’m so terribly bored~”
“Ask and you shall receive. To the extreme!” The door to the infirmary banged open without heed to the patients - or sole patient, in this case - and the Vongola Sun Guardian raced inside. “I heard you were extremely ill so I tried to get here as fast as I could! But the extreme party … was hard to get away from.” Even knowing full well that it was more a good fight Ryohei was after, a worthy opponent like no other, that didn’t stop Lussuria from seeing it in a different light.
“My, my, so Ryohei-chan was worried about me, then?” He clasped his hands together in front of his chest, feigning a love-struck pose before laughing and waving the younger man off. “No need to worry, you silly little boy, I’m just fine. That sly Poison Scorpion just happened to get the better of me this time. But I am glad it wasn’t you that was hurt, dearest Ryohei-chan~” A rough hand settled on his shoulder and Lussuria felt himself sink a tad lower in the bed due to the force behind it. It didn’t bother him, though, and he didn’t brush off the well-meaning hand.
“Still! That was extremely supposed to be me, Lussuria-san!” The Vongola’s Sun had always been so clueless and naïve - and the Varia member was not above using that against the youth for his own personal gain. Deciding to indeed use this to his advantage, he was about to suggest a way Ryohei could make things ‘even’ between them, but the door that was still wide-open emitted another guest to the infirmary and he paused mid-sentence with the invitation.
Both Sun Guardians regarded the boy in the door with two very different expressions. One annoyed and the other clearly happy to see a fellow Family member. “Ah, if it isn’t Fuuta-chan.” Lussuria’s annoyance slipped away, though, as another idea replaced it. “Oho, would Fuuta-chan be interested in playing a fun little game with me and Ryohei-chan?”
The boy, that was really a young man in the making, wheezed out a ‘hold on’ as he panted to catch his breath. When he had finally found it, he straightened from his hands-on-knees position and modestly blushed as he saw the look the Varia member was giving him. “U-Um, Lussuria-nii means …”
“Yes, that’s right. Fuuta-chan is so smart,” praised the flamboyant man to the youth. “Why is Fuuta-chan here, though, I wonder~”
It was an open-ended question that was more of a statement, but Fuuta answered anyway, blush dying down as he realized this was just Lussuria’s way of teasing - his own brand of special humor. “Tsuna-nii asked me to make sure you were okay.”
“As you can see,” purred the Varia’s Sun, “I’m just fine now. But if Fuuta-chan wants …” It was trailed off with a slowly spreading grin that spoke for what words could not.
Fuuta’s previous blush flared back into life and the boy hastily left to report back to Tsuna while Ryohei, off to the side and having been remarkably quiet, wondered aloud, “What was that about to the extreme, Lussuria-san?” Lussuria offered to explain with actions rather than those ever unneeded words.
~
“Mooooommy, daaaaaaddy!” A little blond boy bounced on the spot, eager eyes glued onto the kitchen door. “Is it cake time, isitisitisit?” He tripped over his own two feet, but his father’s hand steadied him on the spot before he could fall face-first to the floor.
“It sure is, son,” remarked the Cavallone Don, motioning for his wife to alert the chef that it was time. He would be six today, Dino Cavallone, and he was bursting with joy at the prospect of getting a real cake this year - a real one. The little boy was sadly disappointed when the chef instead brought out a small cupcake - the usual traditional, because apparently the Cavallone thought it was inappropriate to throw grand parties until the double digits. The only part he could even consider remotely acceptable about this was there was a cowboy on it and the chef, being the kind woman she was, had placed a hat of the same making on his head.
Needless to say, Dino went around pretending to be a cowboy for the rest of the afternoon. Just to spite his parents, really, but it was fun nevertheless.
--REVIEW TIMEZ--
Let's go over what we learned today, shall we?
1.) Xanxus is a super-man in disguise.
2.) Prince and I are unbelievably selfish. AND HAVE DEATH WISHES.
3.) I wonder, though, did a certain someone catch the use of 'Kiri'? Clue: anagram.