(no subject)
It has been a year now, seems like yesterday. Today is just as hard as a year ago today. Why did this ever happen. Why when I got that bad feeling Up North when I noticed he was so tired did I not push it farther, maybe he could have had more time. I can;t believe he won't see my kids grow, he won't see us graduate, he won't be at my brothers wedding or meet his kids. It's not fair. Life just frickin sucks. I just want him to call me, to be here, anything. I am a wreck. And of course my first patient of the day had to be a man with cancer. Cancer is bullshit. How dare it take my dad. How dare it take 2 of my grandpas. Fuck Cancer.