Augh, Family
(Background: I have an older half sister, Cindy, whom I don't talk about much because she is a fuckup, to put it nicely. She's had two kids out of wedlock with two guys who are complete assholes. She married the second one but subsequently divorced him after only a few short years because he's a drug addict. She has a job but often doesn't go to work because she "doesn't feel like working." She's had to move more times than I can count in the past few years, including spending time at a women's shelter. The family has helped her along the way -- paying rent, buying her a car, helping her move, taking care of her daughter for months, letting her and her daughters live with us countless times -- but nothing has ever been enough for her, and nothing has ever convinced her to change her ways in the slightest. The second we refuse to bend to her whims, she complains about how we never help her. I'm a fairly patient person and I tend to believe in giving people second -- or third, or fourth -- chances, but I am pretty fed up with her. That said...)
Just after noon on Saturday, Cindy called me. She said that Reuben, her ex-husband and father of her second daughter Cecilia who is supposed to have her on weekends or every other weekend, "didn't want Cecilia any more." She said she really needed a break and could I please watch her? My immediate reaction was "GOD NO," but I thought quickly and just said that I was sorry but I was really busy and I had to help Mom and Dad out on Sunday and I just didn't have the time to watch Cecilia. All lies; I had absolutely nothing to do that weekend, but that didn't mean I wanted to spend it doing a favour for an ungrateful sister! I really wanted to tell her she should have thought of this before having kids with losers, but I thought that would be mean and not constructive, so I held my tongue. She asked if I was sure, I said yes, and we hung up.
Four hours later, I got this text:
"Catie r u busy now could u watch her either from now til 6 pm and i am lookin for someone to watch her from 6 to am sometime 0please Keep movin:>"
So now just a few hours later, she thinks my plans for the rest of the weekend have magically changed to accommodate her desires. And now she's looking for someone to take her Cecelia all weekend, because whatever time she gives usually means 10+ hours later. So Sunday am really meant Sunday pm, and probably would have stretched to Monday am with a request that I drop her daughter off at her school on the other side of the valley, regardless of the fact that I have work at 8 am. And all that with nothing given in return but a "thank you," if I'm lucky. Yeah, no thanks.
I didn't respond to her text; I'd already given her my answer. She ended up calling Matthew and begging him to take her. He grudgingly agreed when she stated she would drop Cecelia off at 10 pm and pick her up at 10 am, but Cindy never actually materialized with her daughter. She then went on to ask if she could drop her off at 11 am for the rest of the day. After NOT SHOWING UP WHEN SHE SAID SHE WOULD and not alerting Matthew in any way that plans had changed. Really, no surprise there. Matthew made up a story that he had to ref some soccer games so he couldn't do it.
I learned later that Cindy had originally asked Mom -- Mom said no but volunteered me as a possible alternative. Thanks, Mom!
Maybe this seems cold or cruel or heartless to some of you, but you really don't know my sister. She is the worst kind of user. Nothing you ever do for her is good enough. She will use you and use you and use you and the second you dare to say no, you are a horrible person who has never done anything to help her. I've seen her do it time and again with my parents, and I won't be her next target.
Just after noon on Saturday, Cindy called me. She said that Reuben, her ex-husband and father of her second daughter Cecilia who is supposed to have her on weekends or every other weekend, "didn't want Cecilia any more." She said she really needed a break and could I please watch her? My immediate reaction was "GOD NO," but I thought quickly and just said that I was sorry but I was really busy and I had to help Mom and Dad out on Sunday and I just didn't have the time to watch Cecilia. All lies; I had absolutely nothing to do that weekend, but that didn't mean I wanted to spend it doing a favour for an ungrateful sister! I really wanted to tell her she should have thought of this before having kids with losers, but I thought that would be mean and not constructive, so I held my tongue. She asked if I was sure, I said yes, and we hung up.
Four hours later, I got this text:
"Catie r u busy now could u watch her either from now til 6 pm and i am lookin for someone to watch her from 6 to am sometime 0please Keep movin:>"
So now just a few hours later, she thinks my plans for the rest of the weekend have magically changed to accommodate her desires. And now she's looking for someone to take her Cecelia all weekend, because whatever time she gives usually means 10+ hours later. So Sunday am really meant Sunday pm, and probably would have stretched to Monday am with a request that I drop her daughter off at her school on the other side of the valley, regardless of the fact that I have work at 8 am. And all that with nothing given in return but a "thank you," if I'm lucky. Yeah, no thanks.
I didn't respond to her text; I'd already given her my answer. She ended up calling Matthew and begging him to take her. He grudgingly agreed when she stated she would drop Cecelia off at 10 pm and pick her up at 10 am, but Cindy never actually materialized with her daughter. She then went on to ask if she could drop her off at 11 am for the rest of the day. After NOT SHOWING UP WHEN SHE SAID SHE WOULD and not alerting Matthew in any way that plans had changed. Really, no surprise there. Matthew made up a story that he had to ref some soccer games so he couldn't do it.
I learned later that Cindy had originally asked Mom -- Mom said no but volunteered me as a possible alternative. Thanks, Mom!
Maybe this seems cold or cruel or heartless to some of you, but you really don't know my sister. She is the worst kind of user. Nothing you ever do for her is good enough. She will use you and use you and use you and the second you dare to say no, you are a horrible person who has never done anything to help her. I've seen her do it time and again with my parents, and I won't be her next target.