fic: of almost everything (part 7/8)
Title: Of Almost Everything (7/8)
Rating: G
Characters/Pairings: Rory, River, Eleven, Amy (Rory/Amy, Rory + River, Amy + Eleven, Eleven/River)
Wordcount: ~2000
Disclaimer: I don’t own Doctor Who.
Summary: Rory has to pretend to be the Doctor.
Here are the previous parts. A prologue, of sorts, is here.
A/N: Yeah, I said this would be seven parts, but then I somehow added 2000 words, so it’s now eight parts. The eighth and actually final part will be up tomorrow.
“Move!” commanded Amy, reaching into a pocket and withdrawing a pair of hair clips. “I’ve got this.”
“It’s an electric lock.” The Doctor pointed to the tiny box next to the door. “And why are you carrying those in your pocket, they should be in your hair!”
“Did you leave the sonic with Rory? And can the electric lock kill me?”
“Sorry, what?”
“Can. It. Kill. Me?”
“Well, not in this century, on this planet. There are safety-”
With that, Amy reached toward the box, flipped its lid open, and stabbed at the colourful, wiry contents with the clips. There were sparks (going everywhere except toward Amy), and noise, and more sparks, and the Doctor hovering and tearing at his hair, and more noise… and the door promptly swung open, very nearly hitting the Doctor on the head.
A short time later, the door was ever-so-slightly ajar, the broken lock cleverly disguised through the use of the travel folders and a hastily chewed piece of gum, and Amy, Rory and the Doctor were hidden around the corner.
And then came the Judoon. They spotted the slightly ajar door and stopped, which was just what the Doctor wanted. They did not, however, proceed to yank it open and storm into the building. They simply stood still and looked around: this was not what the Doctor wanted.
A quick peek around the corner made this clear to the Doctor. He slunk back to his companions. ‘This is not what I wanted,’ he mouthed.
‘I know what to do,’ mouthed Rory. Then he nodded for emphasis.
The Doctor heaved a dead silent sigh, but spread his hands and leaned back against the dingy wall. Amy merely nodded.
So Rory smoothed out his waistcoat and rounded the corner, as if he’d intended to all along.
The three Judoon stared at him (well, probably; the helmets were very opaque).
“If you’re looking for the Doctor, he went in there.” He pointed to the door. “Um, you’ve read the note… I’ve been to your mothership and your boss said I was very honourable and I think she smiled at me? So, yeah, in there.”
The Judoon Leader motioned, and the two others moved to the door; yanked it open and stormed into the building. The Leader still stared at Rory.
“Yeah,” said Rory, and scratched at his neck.
The Leader thrust a voucher at Rory. “Compensation!”
Rory accepted the voucher, offered a shaky smile - and the Judoon Leader followed the others into the building.
The Doctor, using one of Rory’s shoulders for support, leaped forward and slammed the door shut. “There,” he said, once the door was blocked with some fairly substantial alley debris. “Hope they enjoy fairy lights... and that it takes them a while to find the front door. And, Rory, you really shouldn’t have lied to the Judoon.”
Rory shrugged. “It probably won’t matter.”
The Doctor narrowed his eyes. “Probably?” he asked, in a voice that could have been silky if he had bothered.
“Probably.” He handed Amy the voucher for compensation. “You’d better take this. I want the people here to have it.”
Amy turned it over. “What is it?”
The Doctor shrugged. “A bit of money, or… something. Rory’s right, we should get back to the bubble farm. There are a lot of shocked people to tend to.”
“I’d better not,” said Rory, looking uncomfortable. “River and… me… and an ambulance should be there already.”
“Oh, so we should say goodbye? Or, till we meet again?”
“How about I just leave? Might be less awkward.”
“Hey!” said Amy. “I want to know what’s happened between now and… you. I’m not sure you asked me before you got that haircut.”
“Amy…”
“Come here!” She grabbed his upper arm and held him firmly.
“You’re pinching me!”
“I know! Why did you get a haircut? It would have been less obvious if you hadn’t. And why did you show up like this, going ‘heeey I’m a different Rory’? You could have just knocked yourself out and taken his place and we would never have noticed!”
The Doctor made an affronted noise. “I would have noticed.”
“You would not!” Amy rolled her eyes at the Doctor, turned back to Rory. “Why did you not just knock on the TARDIS door and tell us? I’ve met myself, I get it.”
“It’s-” started Rory.
“Now you’re off wearing a bowtie and the Doctor is wearing this coat thing and really, is it better than the tweed, I mean look at it?”
The Doctor looked.
Amy glared at the coat. “It is not.”
Rory shrugged. “I know this is a bit, well, weird, but it’s not weirder than some of the other stuff, is it?”
“If that’s what you need to tell yourself.”
“It was you who said it, actually.”
The Doctor leaned rather close to Rory’s ear, and said, “Anything you can tell us.”
“Well, I’m not sure. I know that you don’t actually have to do anything, not until later.”
“Ah, and when is later?”
“I can’t tell you… Or, I can, apparently, but not much.”
“It’s fine, Rory. Start from the beginning, if that is the right place to start, of course, otherwise you can start wherever you feel is a good place to start. I’m not picky.”
“Shut up, Doctor,” said Amy; she had gone a bit pale.
Rory sighed. “Well, it started when I was alone in the TARDIS. You were all off doing… something, I was the only one there, and then there was a call for help, a signal… and the TARDIS just took off. We ended up here, and I’d never been here before, obviously, and I just did my best, because they really needed help.”
“What were we off doing?” asked the Doctor.
“Um, Doctor… you were busy with… There was this thing; a bit of a rewriting time feud thing between you and… I shouldn’t say that. You know, it was all time and science and… shenanigans.”
The Doctor narrowed his eyes, urged Rory to continue with a terse sort of gesture.
“So, your opponent…opponents… tried to unwrite this planet, because of my involvement - I really can’t tell you about that. The Doctor created this paradox because I asked him to. You shouldn’t have been here now, but we had to send you here and, yeah. Thought it’d work.” Rory blushed a little and looked down at his trainers. “Didn’t count on the Judoon, really.”
“And Amy? Where was she?”
Rory met Amy’s gaze, smiled slightly. “She and River were busy in a pocket of alternate dimension that sprung up from the coordinates they’d entered into some kind of transporter. Long story. ”
“What kind of transporter?” asked the Doctor.
“Some ancient technology, it was disguised as a gambling table, which was a bit... It’s sort of our trump card.”
“Oh!” said the Doctor. “That transporter. Thought I’d lost that!”
“What?” said Amy, very loudly, putting her hands on her hips. “Repeat, Rory, now!”
“Um, gambling table?”
“That table? That old thing? And the TARDIS was like ‘River, Amy, write on this!’”
Rory flinched. “Oh! Didn’t think you’d know about that yet.”
Amy slapped the Doctor on the arm. “Why is your time machine spitting out tables that lead to other dimensions?”
The Doctor didn’t react; he was busy looking thoughtful while fingering his chin. “Pocket dimension, Amy, whole different matter, shush. Continue, Rory.”
Rory spread his arms. “What? I can’t say any more.”
“Tell me about the paradox.”
“Um…”
“If I’m going to create it, you need to tell me about it. It’s fine.”
Rory pursed his lips. “Well, I suggested the clothes thing. Sorry, Doctor. And to bring you here, the Doctor somehow - I don’t know, sorry - sent the wanted notice and gave these coordinates. I thought I could pass myself off as you, but then the system you used to send the notice automatically generated a stock picture of actual you - you - and a scanner sphere thing was sent to the coordinates, because you’re you, I assume. The Doctor had to come here and spy on it and keep it from trouble and he’s here somewhere right now, keeping other me from running into… this me. I have the worst headache.”
“Wait!” Amy looked weary. “Why would you send the Doctor after something that is out to find him?”
“I’m very good at avoiding scanners,” said the Doctor.
Rory nodded. “And he was the only one who could go. And he’s dressed as me.”
At this, Amy presented a mischievous grin.
The Doctor eyed Rory and presented distaste.
Rory frowned. “It seemed like a good idea at the time.”
Amy said, “So there are two Doctors here? And two Rorys? And two TARDIS…es?”
The Doctor waved the question away. “Who sent the Judoon after you? They are a part of the paradox.”
Rory rubbed a temple. “River. Future River. This River - the one who’s with other me - only knows what I - this me - told her.”
“And you told her to install that tracker… leading us here.”
“So because we’ve met you, the Doctor has to do all that?” Amy paused, groaned. “And the bowtie… it’s actually useful for once?”
Rory nodded. “Time travel, huh?”
“Why dress up as the Doctor at all? It’s not exactly hard to tell the difference between your faces! Or did you just have to do it because you’ve already been here dressed as the Doctor?”
“I’m not really sure. At least I got to practice being the Doctor. Again.”
A sort-of-but-not-really-amiable silence fell between them, during which Amy stared at Rory and Rory stared at Amy and the Doctor ran his tongue over all of his teeth.
When the Doctor had done that for a long while, he stopped and tapped Rory on the shoulder. “You’re clever.”
“Thank you?”
The Doctor grinned, leisurely. “I know what’s happening now.”
Rory smiled. “I’m sorry you had to lose the bowtie.”
The Doctor frowned, looked down at his grey coat, tugged at it. “Oh, it’s not your fault. Besides, I rather like this jacket - it’s great for shinnying up drainpipes in. It’s cool. I’m cool!”
“You’re very weird,” said Amy, affectionately, and patted him on the arm.
“He’s not really that bothered, you know,” said Rory, still smiling. He looked like he’d quite like to pat Amy’s arm, but didn’t.
“What!” exclaimed the Doctor. “I am really bothered! Really. My bowtie.”
Rory smiled. “You told me you’d say that.”
“Maybe I lied when I told you I’d say that.”
“Maybe you’re not actually four years old, Doctor,” said Amy.
“I’m exactly as childish as I appear to be,” the Doctor said, with a very un-childish glare.
“I should go,” said Rory.
He and Amy both shuffled uncertainly, until she took a step forward and threw her arms around him. Whispered something. Pulled back.
When she was done, the Doctor did the same thing, sans whisper. “You’re wonderful!” he shouted in Rory’s ear.
Rory swallowed. “I’m just sorry the people who live here were involved. Apologise from me, please! And make sure that compensation thing goes to the city.”
The Doctor grinned. “We’ll sort it, won’t we, Pond?”
Amy carefully slipped the voucher into a pocket.
There was a muffled roar and a great deal of thumping from the Judoon side of the door. The alley debris was substantial enough, thankfully; the door did not move.
Rory disentangled himself from the Doctor. “Yeah, leaving. Let’s see if I can get this thing to work, this time.” He rolled up a sleeve, revealing a vortex manipulator strapped to the wrist.
The Doctor raised his brows.
Rory eyed the Doctor. Eyed Amy. Eyed the Doctor again. He turned his back on them while programming it.
The Doctor huffed.
Rory faced them again. “Well, bye, I guess.”
“Say hi to future me!” said Amy. “And the pocket dimension!”
“Stay out of trouble,” said the Doctor.
Rory raised a hand. “See you soon!”
Amy and the Doctor waved, and Rory disappeared in a flash of light.
Part 8.
Rating: G
Characters/Pairings: Rory, River, Eleven, Amy (Rory/Amy, Rory + River, Amy + Eleven, Eleven/River)
Wordcount: ~2000
Disclaimer: I don’t own Doctor Who.
Summary: Rory has to pretend to be the Doctor.
Here are the previous parts. A prologue, of sorts, is here.
A/N: Yeah, I said this would be seven parts, but then I somehow added 2000 words, so it’s now eight parts. The eighth and actually final part will be up tomorrow.
“Move!” commanded Amy, reaching into a pocket and withdrawing a pair of hair clips. “I’ve got this.”
“It’s an electric lock.” The Doctor pointed to the tiny box next to the door. “And why are you carrying those in your pocket, they should be in your hair!”
“Did you leave the sonic with Rory? And can the electric lock kill me?”
“Sorry, what?”
“Can. It. Kill. Me?”
“Well, not in this century, on this planet. There are safety-”
With that, Amy reached toward the box, flipped its lid open, and stabbed at the colourful, wiry contents with the clips. There were sparks (going everywhere except toward Amy), and noise, and more sparks, and the Doctor hovering and tearing at his hair, and more noise… and the door promptly swung open, very nearly hitting the Doctor on the head.
A short time later, the door was ever-so-slightly ajar, the broken lock cleverly disguised through the use of the travel folders and a hastily chewed piece of gum, and Amy, Rory and the Doctor were hidden around the corner.
And then came the Judoon. They spotted the slightly ajar door and stopped, which was just what the Doctor wanted. They did not, however, proceed to yank it open and storm into the building. They simply stood still and looked around: this was not what the Doctor wanted.
A quick peek around the corner made this clear to the Doctor. He slunk back to his companions. ‘This is not what I wanted,’ he mouthed.
‘I know what to do,’ mouthed Rory. Then he nodded for emphasis.
The Doctor heaved a dead silent sigh, but spread his hands and leaned back against the dingy wall. Amy merely nodded.
So Rory smoothed out his waistcoat and rounded the corner, as if he’d intended to all along.
The three Judoon stared at him (well, probably; the helmets were very opaque).
“If you’re looking for the Doctor, he went in there.” He pointed to the door. “Um, you’ve read the note… I’ve been to your mothership and your boss said I was very honourable and I think she smiled at me? So, yeah, in there.”
The Judoon Leader motioned, and the two others moved to the door; yanked it open and stormed into the building. The Leader still stared at Rory.
“Yeah,” said Rory, and scratched at his neck.
The Leader thrust a voucher at Rory. “Compensation!”
Rory accepted the voucher, offered a shaky smile - and the Judoon Leader followed the others into the building.
The Doctor, using one of Rory’s shoulders for support, leaped forward and slammed the door shut. “There,” he said, once the door was blocked with some fairly substantial alley debris. “Hope they enjoy fairy lights... and that it takes them a while to find the front door. And, Rory, you really shouldn’t have lied to the Judoon.”
Rory shrugged. “It probably won’t matter.”
The Doctor narrowed his eyes. “Probably?” he asked, in a voice that could have been silky if he had bothered.
“Probably.” He handed Amy the voucher for compensation. “You’d better take this. I want the people here to have it.”
Amy turned it over. “What is it?”
The Doctor shrugged. “A bit of money, or… something. Rory’s right, we should get back to the bubble farm. There are a lot of shocked people to tend to.”
“I’d better not,” said Rory, looking uncomfortable. “River and… me… and an ambulance should be there already.”
“Oh, so we should say goodbye? Or, till we meet again?”
“How about I just leave? Might be less awkward.”
“Hey!” said Amy. “I want to know what’s happened between now and… you. I’m not sure you asked me before you got that haircut.”
“Amy…”
“Come here!” She grabbed his upper arm and held him firmly.
“You’re pinching me!”
“I know! Why did you get a haircut? It would have been less obvious if you hadn’t. And why did you show up like this, going ‘heeey I’m a different Rory’? You could have just knocked yourself out and taken his place and we would never have noticed!”
The Doctor made an affronted noise. “I would have noticed.”
“You would not!” Amy rolled her eyes at the Doctor, turned back to Rory. “Why did you not just knock on the TARDIS door and tell us? I’ve met myself, I get it.”
“It’s-” started Rory.
“Now you’re off wearing a bowtie and the Doctor is wearing this coat thing and really, is it better than the tweed, I mean look at it?”
The Doctor looked.
Amy glared at the coat. “It is not.”
Rory shrugged. “I know this is a bit, well, weird, but it’s not weirder than some of the other stuff, is it?”
“If that’s what you need to tell yourself.”
“It was you who said it, actually.”
The Doctor leaned rather close to Rory’s ear, and said, “Anything you can tell us.”
“Well, I’m not sure. I know that you don’t actually have to do anything, not until later.”
“Ah, and when is later?”
“I can’t tell you… Or, I can, apparently, but not much.”
“It’s fine, Rory. Start from the beginning, if that is the right place to start, of course, otherwise you can start wherever you feel is a good place to start. I’m not picky.”
“Shut up, Doctor,” said Amy; she had gone a bit pale.
Rory sighed. “Well, it started when I was alone in the TARDIS. You were all off doing… something, I was the only one there, and then there was a call for help, a signal… and the TARDIS just took off. We ended up here, and I’d never been here before, obviously, and I just did my best, because they really needed help.”
“What were we off doing?” asked the Doctor.
“Um, Doctor… you were busy with… There was this thing; a bit of a rewriting time feud thing between you and… I shouldn’t say that. You know, it was all time and science and… shenanigans.”
The Doctor narrowed his eyes, urged Rory to continue with a terse sort of gesture.
“So, your opponent…opponents… tried to unwrite this planet, because of my involvement - I really can’t tell you about that. The Doctor created this paradox because I asked him to. You shouldn’t have been here now, but we had to send you here and, yeah. Thought it’d work.” Rory blushed a little and looked down at his trainers. “Didn’t count on the Judoon, really.”
“And Amy? Where was she?”
Rory met Amy’s gaze, smiled slightly. “She and River were busy in a pocket of alternate dimension that sprung up from the coordinates they’d entered into some kind of transporter. Long story. ”
“What kind of transporter?” asked the Doctor.
“Some ancient technology, it was disguised as a gambling table, which was a bit... It’s sort of our trump card.”
“Oh!” said the Doctor. “That transporter. Thought I’d lost that!”
“What?” said Amy, very loudly, putting her hands on her hips. “Repeat, Rory, now!”
“Um, gambling table?”
“That table? That old thing? And the TARDIS was like ‘River, Amy, write on this!’”
Rory flinched. “Oh! Didn’t think you’d know about that yet.”
Amy slapped the Doctor on the arm. “Why is your time machine spitting out tables that lead to other dimensions?”
The Doctor didn’t react; he was busy looking thoughtful while fingering his chin. “Pocket dimension, Amy, whole different matter, shush. Continue, Rory.”
Rory spread his arms. “What? I can’t say any more.”
“Tell me about the paradox.”
“Um…”
“If I’m going to create it, you need to tell me about it. It’s fine.”
Rory pursed his lips. “Well, I suggested the clothes thing. Sorry, Doctor. And to bring you here, the Doctor somehow - I don’t know, sorry - sent the wanted notice and gave these coordinates. I thought I could pass myself off as you, but then the system you used to send the notice automatically generated a stock picture of actual you - you - and a scanner sphere thing was sent to the coordinates, because you’re you, I assume. The Doctor had to come here and spy on it and keep it from trouble and he’s here somewhere right now, keeping other me from running into… this me. I have the worst headache.”
“Wait!” Amy looked weary. “Why would you send the Doctor after something that is out to find him?”
“I’m very good at avoiding scanners,” said the Doctor.
Rory nodded. “And he was the only one who could go. And he’s dressed as me.”
At this, Amy presented a mischievous grin.
The Doctor eyed Rory and presented distaste.
Rory frowned. “It seemed like a good idea at the time.”
Amy said, “So there are two Doctors here? And two Rorys? And two TARDIS…es?”
The Doctor waved the question away. “Who sent the Judoon after you? They are a part of the paradox.”
Rory rubbed a temple. “River. Future River. This River - the one who’s with other me - only knows what I - this me - told her.”
“And you told her to install that tracker… leading us here.”
“So because we’ve met you, the Doctor has to do all that?” Amy paused, groaned. “And the bowtie… it’s actually useful for once?”
Rory nodded. “Time travel, huh?”
“Why dress up as the Doctor at all? It’s not exactly hard to tell the difference between your faces! Or did you just have to do it because you’ve already been here dressed as the Doctor?”
“I’m not really sure. At least I got to practice being the Doctor. Again.”
A sort-of-but-not-really-amiable silence fell between them, during which Amy stared at Rory and Rory stared at Amy and the Doctor ran his tongue over all of his teeth.
When the Doctor had done that for a long while, he stopped and tapped Rory on the shoulder. “You’re clever.”
“Thank you?”
The Doctor grinned, leisurely. “I know what’s happening now.”
Rory smiled. “I’m sorry you had to lose the bowtie.”
The Doctor frowned, looked down at his grey coat, tugged at it. “Oh, it’s not your fault. Besides, I rather like this jacket - it’s great for shinnying up drainpipes in. It’s cool. I’m cool!”
“You’re very weird,” said Amy, affectionately, and patted him on the arm.
“He’s not really that bothered, you know,” said Rory, still smiling. He looked like he’d quite like to pat Amy’s arm, but didn’t.
“What!” exclaimed the Doctor. “I am really bothered! Really. My bowtie.”
Rory smiled. “You told me you’d say that.”
“Maybe I lied when I told you I’d say that.”
“Maybe you’re not actually four years old, Doctor,” said Amy.
“I’m exactly as childish as I appear to be,” the Doctor said, with a very un-childish glare.
“I should go,” said Rory.
He and Amy both shuffled uncertainly, until she took a step forward and threw her arms around him. Whispered something. Pulled back.
When she was done, the Doctor did the same thing, sans whisper. “You’re wonderful!” he shouted in Rory’s ear.
Rory swallowed. “I’m just sorry the people who live here were involved. Apologise from me, please! And make sure that compensation thing goes to the city.”
The Doctor grinned. “We’ll sort it, won’t we, Pond?”
Amy carefully slipped the voucher into a pocket.
There was a muffled roar and a great deal of thumping from the Judoon side of the door. The alley debris was substantial enough, thankfully; the door did not move.
Rory disentangled himself from the Doctor. “Yeah, leaving. Let’s see if I can get this thing to work, this time.” He rolled up a sleeve, revealing a vortex manipulator strapped to the wrist.
The Doctor raised his brows.
Rory eyed the Doctor. Eyed Amy. Eyed the Doctor again. He turned his back on them while programming it.
The Doctor huffed.
Rory faced them again. “Well, bye, I guess.”
“Say hi to future me!” said Amy. “And the pocket dimension!”
“Stay out of trouble,” said the Doctor.
Rory raised a hand. “See you soon!”
Amy and the Doctor waved, and Rory disappeared in a flash of light.
Part 8.