Poignant Affairs; Chapter 03 - Not a Man of Many Words
Title: Poignant Affairs
Author: honeyiceblend
Length: 3/15
Genre: Romance, Slight Angst, Drama
Characters: Yunjae, Jaemin
Summary: Time cannot erase the pain. Neither can it wash memories away. Memories, so vital to one and the only thing you can hold on to. Maybe one day I will open up my palm to let the breeze blow the dandelions away. As if letting go of your soul…
Warning: Character's death
Previous Chapters: 1 | 2 |
The Present (2009)
My eyes traced the Mickey Mouse clock hung alone on the purple-painted wall. From its childish design of Mickey’s elongated hands to form the second and minute hands of the clock to the sentimental value behind it, I loved it. My nieces adored it too but they could never figure out the reason behind my fallen tears these days. Sometimes I wished I could be as innocent as a child, as they say, ignorance is bliss, and I wish I did not have to face the harsh reality of life, of separation, of the void emptiness where my love for him.
“Uncle…” Moonbin tugged on my oversized shirtsleeve. I glanced at him as he climbed gingerly onto the large bed I was lying comfortably on. Sungwoong, who was behind him, followed. I propped myself up into a sitting position as the twins clambered into my embrace, “Uncle, where’s Yunho hyung?”
The long torturous two weeks had dragged by without their companion and obviously they were affected by their Uncle’s gloomy longing which had manifested itself over the days. “I miss him, Uncle… Where Yunho hyung go?” Was it time to tell them? Would they be able to understand? I mused. Perhaps it’s only fair that they should know. I pondered on how I should phrase the hurtful truth.
Pointing at the empty space where the creaseless bed sheets lay beside me. I hugged the twins tighter. “Yunho hyung used to sleep here didn’t he?” I asked them gently.
They nodded, their big round eyes staring at me innocently, anticipating the ‘story’ I was about to unravel. “Now, he’s sleeping somewhere else… Somewhere where we can’t find him…”
Sungwoong let out a devastated cry, “Yunho hyung no coming no more?”
I shook my head, “No more, Sungwoong, no more…”
“Why? Where is he?”
I refused to bluff them with the far-away land rubbish, I had never believed in Heaven or Hell and do not want my nieces to indulge in their fantasizes at their hyung being his afterlife happily ever after in Heaven. But what else could I say to make a 3-year-old understand the cruel meaning of death? “Yunho… he had moved on…”
“Move on?” Moonbin gave a puzzled look, “Yunho Hyung moved on? Where?”
“Yunho had left us, and he won’t be returning… ” My voice cracked but I blinked my prickling tears away. “Yunho’s dead. Do you understand the meaning of dead?”
My beloved nieces both stared at me, their expressions wrought with despair. My heart ached at their reactions, not wanting them to feel sad, yet at the same time, feeling a selfish release after finally letting all the secrets kept from my nieces spill out. I was not sure if they understood my words but from their facial expressions, I knew the truth was tormenting them inside out, “Dead. Uncle? Yunho Hyung won’t come back?” Sungwoong seemed to be stating the fact forcibly, in disbelief. “But me want Yunho Hyung!”
I want Yunho too… I want him so much…
I could not answer Sungwoong, I did not know how to comfort him, how to make him feel better, when me myself could not deal with the facts alone. The twins began crying and I felt worse, their tears reminding me painfully of the shattered remains of my universe.
For the rest of the hour, the three of us cried in each other’s arms, seeking comfort in the love and beauty of family.
4 Years Ago
[Daejeon High School]
“I’m not a man of many words… I don’t know how to compose poems or sweet talk to make you happy but I do want you to be happy.”
I burst out laughing, throwing my head back as I slammed the table repeatedly with my palm. Oh my goodness. So hilarious! How can he even write something so side-splitting! My sides started aching as my mirthful laughter boomed across the classroom. Very soon, the class diverted their attention to me as I struggled to stop mocking Yunho. Even when that same Geography teacher who gave me detention stared enraged at me with his beady eyes, I could stifle my laughter.
I could just die laughing; well that was what I had thought, until Yunho slapped me painfully on the back with his “Super Smack”. “Oof.” I was pushed forward by the strong and powerful impact and the aching sting of the smack immediately put an end to my entertainment. “Stop laughing, you moron!” he hissed at me, his eyes darting uncomfortably back and forth from the teacher to me.
“Thank you Yunho, for bringing Mr Jaejoong back into the real world,” Stupid Yunho was beaming at the boring old teacher’s praising remark! Gross! I don’t ever think anybody will admire him although he is admittedly quite dashing, yet his rotten attitude sucks and his ego is as big as a water buffalo! If any normal boy like me in Daejeon has no intention of going out with someone like Yunho. He, then he shouldn’t even dream about Bae SeulGi, obviously the school belle.
Don’t ask me how I came to know his secretive crush on SeulGi; in fact it should not even be a secret! He apparently doodles SeulGi’s enormous name every lesson he is uninterested in, which basically defines, every class. Well he did that until he stupidly realized that I could see his SeulGi-filled notes at a wonderful angle from my table since evidently I sat right smack beside him. he did attempt to cover up for his embarrassing antic yet his incredible crush for SeulGi has been revealed to me and from then on, I could blackmail him with it. Yunho is such a dork isn’t he? Who in the world writes their crush’s name so openly on their notes every single day like he could not live a single second with her? Well maybe girls do that, but they had the unspoken permission to.
Boring-old Geography teacher was beginning to lecture me and soon I realized what Yunho’s foolish love letter had made me miss. He was droning on about a certain Geography Disgust was scribbled clearly over all Yunho’s sharp features as well. Okay, wait a minute; was I so difficult to work with that he has to give that fearsome-slash-disgusted grimace?
“Well, idiot looks like I’m stuck on you. This assignment is to be handed in on Wednesday… which is apparently two days from now, so do you mind coming over to my house to get it done once and for all?” wow I could not believe how surprisingly polite and well-mannered I sounded. Quite shockingly, he returned my temporary amiability, “Okay, moron, I’ll oblige and go to your house for the first and last time.”
Never did I guess at that point of time that his was Yunho’s first time visiting my house yet not the final.