Head Trip
Random:
Because that's how I roll.
- My mother is a closet fooseball queen. No shit. She played solo against me AND my brother, and won.
- My grandmother arrives tomorrow and will undoubtably ask when I'm planning to procreate some great grand babies for her. She's a sweet women who has been through an absolutely horrendous year and has lost so much that I barely have the heart to tell her that I really don't want to do that kind of shit to myself any time soon. I kind of like my boobs where they are, you know?
- On that note - my uterus would like you to know that she's desperate to get pregnant and is currently taking applications. She is tempermental and horny and hormonal and wants babies bad enough that she considers kidnapping a viable option. She asks that you have the jaw of sparkly-vamp-boy and the brain and wobbly voice of REC. She bought frilly undies to seduce her husband, but he's downstairs playing fooseball a lot these days.
- (If you don't know who I am referring to by REC - you have no idea who I am at all. Shame on you.)
- I just hit the 700 page mark of some sort of novella that will never see the light of day. Strange how I justify my free-time these days.
- Went to church for the first time in easily fifteen years on Sunday. Awkward. Ben vetoed my first three outfits as such : too short / too low cut / too punk rock. The punk rock was my leather jacket, which must mean God is a vegan. Who knew?
Anyway --> I feel pretty damn dubious about the whole god/religion thing as it is, and I don't think the whole experiance helped me much. We went for our niece Evangeline's baptism and Ben took the pledge to help lead her along a 'godly christian path' or some such nonsense as her godfather. (We wont even begin the discussion about how funny I think it is that they picked him. It's sort of mean, but totally true. Especially considering we're trying pretty damn hard to NOT get preganant. Don't tell my uterus.) We then sat through the entire sermon and while it certainly wasn't hellfire and brimstone sort of stuff, it just made my head spin a little. So much sitting and standing and finding certain pages and singing certain verses of songs at certain times.... I started to get the feeling that it was something you got better at after a while, practice makes perfect and all. And then to watch my in-laws go through this ceremony that is really only meant to reassure them and has nothing to do with that particular person's (Eva's) wishes? I know she's only nine months old, but shit, it's not like she asked for this. There's even a part where the priest or pastor or whatever asks if the person desires to be baptized and apparently it's just fine for the parents to respond in the affirmative. And then the whole diatribe about how you are conceived and born sinful? W.T.F. I just can't jump on that bandwagon. Babies are sweet and new and not fucked up yet, the idea that they're automatically full of sin before they even take a breath just doesn't jive with me. Period. I refuse to push my child into something that I believe in, simply to alleviate my own fear when I tuck them in at night that I brought them into a kind of shitty world.
Gah.
Holy Rant.
-Listened to this song on repeat for almost an hour today. It still hasn't lost it's magic.
This shit is pure fucking heartache all mashed up with bliss and rolled in a fine dusting of lust.
Because that's how I roll.
- My mother is a closet fooseball queen. No shit. She played solo against me AND my brother, and won.
- My grandmother arrives tomorrow and will undoubtably ask when I'm planning to procreate some great grand babies for her. She's a sweet women who has been through an absolutely horrendous year and has lost so much that I barely have the heart to tell her that I really don't want to do that kind of shit to myself any time soon. I kind of like my boobs where they are, you know?
- On that note - my uterus would like you to know that she's desperate to get pregnant and is currently taking applications. She is tempermental and horny and hormonal and wants babies bad enough that she considers kidnapping a viable option. She asks that you have the jaw of sparkly-vamp-boy and the brain and wobbly voice of REC. She bought frilly undies to seduce her husband, but he's downstairs playing fooseball a lot these days.
- (If you don't know who I am referring to by REC - you have no idea who I am at all. Shame on you.)
- I just hit the 700 page mark of some sort of novella that will never see the light of day. Strange how I justify my free-time these days.
- Went to church for the first time in easily fifteen years on Sunday. Awkward. Ben vetoed my first three outfits as such : too short / too low cut / too punk rock. The punk rock was my leather jacket, which must mean God is a vegan. Who knew?
Anyway --> I feel pretty damn dubious about the whole god/religion thing as it is, and I don't think the whole experiance helped me much. We went for our niece Evangeline's baptism and Ben took the pledge to help lead her along a 'godly christian path' or some such nonsense as her godfather. (We wont even begin the discussion about how funny I think it is that they picked him. It's sort of mean, but totally true. Especially considering we're trying pretty damn hard to NOT get preganant. Don't tell my uterus.) We then sat through the entire sermon and while it certainly wasn't hellfire and brimstone sort of stuff, it just made my head spin a little. So much sitting and standing and finding certain pages and singing certain verses of songs at certain times.... I started to get the feeling that it was something you got better at after a while, practice makes perfect and all. And then to watch my in-laws go through this ceremony that is really only meant to reassure them and has nothing to do with that particular person's (Eva's) wishes? I know she's only nine months old, but shit, it's not like she asked for this. There's even a part where the priest or pastor or whatever asks if the person desires to be baptized and apparently it's just fine for the parents to respond in the affirmative. And then the whole diatribe about how you are conceived and born sinful? W.T.F. I just can't jump on that bandwagon. Babies are sweet and new and not fucked up yet, the idea that they're automatically full of sin before they even take a breath just doesn't jive with me. Period. I refuse to push my child into something that I believe in, simply to alleviate my own fear when I tuck them in at night that I brought them into a kind of shitty world.
Gah.
Holy Rant.
-Listened to this song on repeat for almost an hour today. It still hasn't lost it's magic.
This shit is pure fucking heartache all mashed up with bliss and rolled in a fine dusting of lust.
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