the filter we were all born with, and so many dont use
well this weekend was exactly what the doctor orderd, thursday, cider point, thursday night, senior party, fri-sunday, 60 miles of trail riding on some of the nicest, most difficult trails i have ever ridden. i came home feeling like a new man, but i came home to a cold welcome, the person i figured would be most likely to want to talk to me had nothing more to say than yes's and no's, and a 20 minute silence ending with well ill see you tommrow at school. it blows my mind that someone can act as if they would like nothing more than to spend time with you, date you, then the next minute ignore you like your a ghost. i usualy love playing games, untile it comes to this and now im done, im sick of beeing played.
and now ive let my big ass head get in the way again, screewing up one of the best friendships ive ever had. and please dont be upset, i am truly sorry for this. like the subject says, so many do not use that filter between their brain and their mouth, and i am the worst offender.
the people i turn to for advice only give me answers like dont talk to the past, and only look to the future. this blows my mind that people can be so narrow minded, and tell me to throw away friendships because of previous involvments.
im left feeling alone, i dont know where to turn and its a scary thought, the people i once felt comftorable around, now i feel alianated, the odd man out, and the people i try to move onto only make the alianation worse.
the next few months will be filled with this termoil, leaving old friends who in reality are incredibly new, only to try for newwer friends in a strange place just like before. it leaves me with the question of wether i will truley ever be settled and in a place i know.
and now ive let my big ass head get in the way again, screewing up one of the best friendships ive ever had. and please dont be upset, i am truly sorry for this. like the subject says, so many do not use that filter between their brain and their mouth, and i am the worst offender.
the people i turn to for advice only give me answers like dont talk to the past, and only look to the future. this blows my mind that people can be so narrow minded, and tell me to throw away friendships because of previous involvments.
im left feeling alone, i dont know where to turn and its a scary thought, the people i once felt comftorable around, now i feel alianated, the odd man out, and the people i try to move onto only make the alianation worse.
the next few months will be filled with this termoil, leaving old friends who in reality are incredibly new, only to try for newwer friends in a strange place just like before. it leaves me with the question of wether i will truley ever be settled and in a place i know.