(no subject)
By God, chocolate cake and scads of coffee at 4AM work miracles for the mind; I have finally realized what I would do if I were to win the lottery or, God willing, some rich ol' baron were to die and mysteriously name me his sole successor. Up until now, the best answer I could come up with was the standard little kid fantasy fare:
I'd buy a buncha cars and an airplane and lotsa video games and I'd store them all in a subterranean gymnasium that I would have built underneath my parents' house so that no one would know I was a bjillionaire.
Well, dumplings, the kid gloves are off because I'll be goddamned if I haven't come up with something infinitely better and far more rewarding. First, I'd set aside enough money for the essentials: finishing house payments, graduate school, a few expensive toys for my parents, and just enough to make sure I could live comfortably but not above the means that I do now. The remainder, however, would be left to appreciate in long term accounts or sure-fire stocks or something similar. I'm no stockbroker. I'd hire someone who knew what the hell that they were doing to make sure things go off without a hitch. Anyway, point is that money would make more money.
Now, all of these fabulous sums would go to one end and one end alone. Being the charitable soul that I am, I would set up a scholarship fund that would guarantee full tuition to a certain number of students per year, regardless of the price of the institution, provided that they don't take advantage and become professional scholars or any such nonsense. The number of applications accepted would be adjusted according to the sum of scholarships currently being paid to ensure that the funds never decrease.
The only qualifications that the potential candidates have to meet are 1) that they are students of promise whose past achievements and interests demonstrate both a willingness to try and make the most of whatever opportunities they have and that they are not pursuing a degree merely for the sake of appending a few letters after their names, and 2) that, in any given time in the future, for every degree acquired with my money I am entitled to ask of them one favor which they are obligated to fulfill to the extent of their abilities.
The average prospective physician graduates over $100,000 in debt (http://www.ama-assn.org/ama/pub/category/13528.html) and it's damn near impossible to avoid the fact that tuition in general is constantly increasing (http://www.aascu.org/student_charges06/fig1.htm). How much trouble should I have finding brilliant yet tragically underfunding young achievers willing to take the gamble in exchange for the realization of their dreams? Even considering those who fail to rise to my expectations after graduation, it should be little time before I have an army of affluent, educated people in positions of influence who owe me big.
Oh, and of course there will be the inevitable penalties for dropping out which, not limited to repossession of all their worldly goods, which should further indebt them to me. Hired muscle, anyone? And it goes without saying that, should I die prematurely, all favors, goods, accounts, loyalties, and obligations would be transfered to my next of kin. Given a little patience and a touch of politcal acumen, it shouldn't be too long before my descendants are running their own country.
Legacy: secured.
I'd buy a buncha cars and an airplane and lotsa video games and I'd store them all in a subterranean gymnasium that I would have built underneath my parents' house so that no one would know I was a bjillionaire.
Well, dumplings, the kid gloves are off because I'll be goddamned if I haven't come up with something infinitely better and far more rewarding. First, I'd set aside enough money for the essentials: finishing house payments, graduate school, a few expensive toys for my parents, and just enough to make sure I could live comfortably but not above the means that I do now. The remainder, however, would be left to appreciate in long term accounts or sure-fire stocks or something similar. I'm no stockbroker. I'd hire someone who knew what the hell that they were doing to make sure things go off without a hitch. Anyway, point is that money would make more money.
Now, all of these fabulous sums would go to one end and one end alone. Being the charitable soul that I am, I would set up a scholarship fund that would guarantee full tuition to a certain number of students per year, regardless of the price of the institution, provided that they don't take advantage and become professional scholars or any such nonsense. The number of applications accepted would be adjusted according to the sum of scholarships currently being paid to ensure that the funds never decrease.
The only qualifications that the potential candidates have to meet are 1) that they are students of promise whose past achievements and interests demonstrate both a willingness to try and make the most of whatever opportunities they have and that they are not pursuing a degree merely for the sake of appending a few letters after their names, and 2) that, in any given time in the future, for every degree acquired with my money I am entitled to ask of them one favor which they are obligated to fulfill to the extent of their abilities.
The average prospective physician graduates over $100,000 in debt (http://www.ama-assn.org/ama/pub/category/13528.html) and it's damn near impossible to avoid the fact that tuition in general is constantly increasing (http://www.aascu.org/student_charges06/fig1.htm). How much trouble should I have finding brilliant yet tragically underfunding young achievers willing to take the gamble in exchange for the realization of their dreams? Even considering those who fail to rise to my expectations after graduation, it should be little time before I have an army of affluent, educated people in positions of influence who owe me big.
Oh, and of course there will be the inevitable penalties for dropping out which, not limited to repossession of all their worldly goods, which should further indebt them to me. Hired muscle, anyone? And it goes without saying that, should I die prematurely, all favors, goods, accounts, loyalties, and obligations would be transfered to my next of kin. Given a little patience and a touch of politcal acumen, it shouldn't be too long before my descendants are running their own country.
Legacy: secured.