And here's me bitching about Brian Urlacher.
I'm gonna say it right now; I'm a Jay Cutler fan. A big one. A really big one. As big as Brian Urlacher's ego. Actually, no, nevermind. Only Jupiter is larger, and that's debatable.
Speaking of which (see how I seamlessly transitioned into that?), have you heard about Urlacher calling Jay a pussy on a nationally syndicated radio show?
I present a theory: Brian misses Jay topping him. Jay broke up with him because Brian's too clingy and dependent, and now Brian is upset and will do everything he can to make Jay miserable. But he fails, because WE ALL KNOW YOU'RE GAY, BRIAN. ALL OF US. Even the staunchest rural Illinois cattle hands are like, "Urlacher? Yeah, he's so deep in the closet, he's in Narnia. He's in Narnia having buttsex with Mr. Tumnus."
Speaking of which (see how I seamlessly transitioned into that?), have you heard about Urlacher calling Jay a pussy on a nationally syndicated radio show?
I present a theory: Brian misses Jay topping him. Jay broke up with him because Brian's too clingy and dependent, and now Brian is upset and will do everything he can to make Jay miserable. But he fails, because WE ALL KNOW YOU'RE GAY, BRIAN. ALL OF US. Even the staunchest rural Illinois cattle hands are like, "Urlacher? Yeah, he's so deep in the closet, he's in Narnia. He's in Narnia having buttsex with Mr. Tumnus."