I really need help with this one.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Okay, so I only seem to post on this site when I'm just really pissed off, and totally skrewed up. So bear with me.
So, Tony and I broke up, for good this time, and it sucks. 'Cause I'm really letting go this time, letting go of something that's been there for as long as it could be. But I think I'm good now. I've realized that I don't need a significant other. I'm good by myself. I don't want to be by myself, but I don't need anyone. I'm not going to go chasing either, they have to show me their worth it.
I'm fighting with my friend Jill. She's the first good female friend I've had since Tahirih moved to Germany. She's freakin' awesome, and more insane than all of ya'll put together. Through her I've met people who actually call me and ask me if I want to come hang out, THEN come and pick me up and drop me off back at home.
Problem? She is the biggest player since...actually...I think she's the original player. She plays with guys like their dolls, then drops 'em. Hard. She does things to mislead them into thinking that she likes 'em, or even worse, that they're her one and only. She was engaged AND had three other boyfriends, a guy who was moving from north Texas to live near her, and a train of 'minions' long enough to reach the moon and back again. And it's their fault that they react the way they do, and it's not her fault. She seduces them, then can't figure out why she has so many border-line stalkers. She has driven at least one of them to burning himself. I sat there and watched him heat up a lighter, put it out, then try and press it up against his arm. I put my hand between the lighter and his skin and asked him what he was doing. We talked for a while, and i made him promise me that he wasn't going to do it again, and if he felt like doing it to call me. No matter what time it was. (BTW, that goes for all of you too. I don't care if it's 4 in the morning. Call me)
Other than that character flaw, she's awesome. But we had a falling out about it yesterday night and if we can't deal with it then all of that's gone. She is the kind that if she really doesn't like you then none of her friends are allowed to like you. And it's not a concious dicsion(sp?), but if someone picked me over her she would take it as them being a traitor. She lives and breathes loyalty. When you swear your allegiance to her (I'm not kidding here, she literally has them swear their allegiance. She does it as a joke, but she's serious) she considers you hers. If someone else wants you then they must "barter for their freedom. And frankly Jayda, you don't have anything to barter with". There is no option of leaving.
My problem with it is that it hurts the ones being dangled, who are also my friends. Jill is a better friend, but those guys are still my friends, and what she's doing is manipulative and wrong. I'm not going to get involved any more than I already have, but what do I do when it comes down to stand by Jill (thereby giving silent agreement to all of it) or do I try and stand up for the ones being hurt and lose the friendship with Jill? I know what to do, but damn it, I really am going ot have a hard time when push comes to shove.
Growing up !*@%&#$ sucks @$$.
Okay, so I only seem to post on this site when I'm just really pissed off, and totally skrewed up. So bear with me.
So, Tony and I broke up, for good this time, and it sucks. 'Cause I'm really letting go this time, letting go of something that's been there for as long as it could be. But I think I'm good now. I've realized that I don't need a significant other. I'm good by myself. I don't want to be by myself, but I don't need anyone. I'm not going to go chasing either, they have to show me their worth it.
I'm fighting with my friend Jill. She's the first good female friend I've had since Tahirih moved to Germany. She's freakin' awesome, and more insane than all of ya'll put together. Through her I've met people who actually call me and ask me if I want to come hang out, THEN come and pick me up and drop me off back at home.
Problem? She is the biggest player since...actually...I think she's the original player. She plays with guys like their dolls, then drops 'em. Hard. She does things to mislead them into thinking that she likes 'em, or even worse, that they're her one and only. She was engaged AND had three other boyfriends, a guy who was moving from north Texas to live near her, and a train of 'minions' long enough to reach the moon and back again. And it's their fault that they react the way they do, and it's not her fault. She seduces them, then can't figure out why she has so many border-line stalkers. She has driven at least one of them to burning himself. I sat there and watched him heat up a lighter, put it out, then try and press it up against his arm. I put my hand between the lighter and his skin and asked him what he was doing. We talked for a while, and i made him promise me that he wasn't going to do it again, and if he felt like doing it to call me. No matter what time it was. (BTW, that goes for all of you too. I don't care if it's 4 in the morning. Call me)
Other than that character flaw, she's awesome. But we had a falling out about it yesterday night and if we can't deal with it then all of that's gone. She is the kind that if she really doesn't like you then none of her friends are allowed to like you. And it's not a concious dicsion(sp?), but if someone picked me over her she would take it as them being a traitor. She lives and breathes loyalty. When you swear your allegiance to her (I'm not kidding here, she literally has them swear their allegiance. She does it as a joke, but she's serious) she considers you hers. If someone else wants you then they must "barter for their freedom. And frankly Jayda, you don't have anything to barter with". There is no option of leaving.
My problem with it is that it hurts the ones being dangled, who are also my friends. Jill is a better friend, but those guys are still my friends, and what she's doing is manipulative and wrong. I'm not going to get involved any more than I already have, but what do I do when it comes down to stand by Jill (thereby giving silent agreement to all of it) or do I try and stand up for the ones being hurt and lose the friendship with Jill? I know what to do, but damn it, I really am going ot have a hard time when push comes to shove.
Growing up !*@%&#$ sucks @$$.