(no subject)
Last night I felt scared because, sitting alone on the couch in a house I won't share with my dad and lynn much longer, my life seemed like a weird dream. Did I really go on those trips? Are there people who know me in Halifax, and what on earth do I think I'm doing, going to Portland Michigan to find part-time work as a receptionist in a physical therapist's office?
It's totally nonlinear, and full of little recurrences and coincidences that I perhaps put too much stock in, looking for fatelines in my secret semi-superstitious way. The beautiful 2nd floor flat in Portland with its enormous sugar maple in the backyard, and the many-colored possibilities of the eastside "Artist House" near downtown Lansing seemed so different, it was impossibly frustrating to comprehend that they both could be fine places to live. But that's the only conclusion I can come to, having seen and felt the warmth of both, and having talked to the people who live there. 300 Hayford reminds me of Arbor Vitae and the sort of calm, coolly earnest happiness I felt there on the pizza-and-music nights last january. 518 James is, well, almost exactly what I pictured for my first apartment...AND I could have a cat. Now all I have to do is live until I know if there's room for me on Hayford, and then I'll make my plans and select what stuff comes with me. Either way, I'll be riding my bike down leafy neighborhood streets this spring!
It's totally nonlinear, and full of little recurrences and coincidences that I perhaps put too much stock in, looking for fatelines in my secret semi-superstitious way. The beautiful 2nd floor flat in Portland with its enormous sugar maple in the backyard, and the many-colored possibilities of the eastside "Artist House" near downtown Lansing seemed so different, it was impossibly frustrating to comprehend that they both could be fine places to live. But that's the only conclusion I can come to, having seen and felt the warmth of both, and having talked to the people who live there. 300 Hayford reminds me of Arbor Vitae and the sort of calm, coolly earnest happiness I felt there on the pizza-and-music nights last january. 518 James is, well, almost exactly what I pictured for my first apartment...AND I could have a cat. Now all I have to do is live until I know if there's room for me on Hayford, and then I'll make my plans and select what stuff comes with me. Either way, I'll be riding my bike down leafy neighborhood streets this spring!