Being observed, spring break plans, BSG...
Today I was supposed to be observed. I hate being observed. I hate the idea of someone coming in my classroom and mucking things up with a foreign presence. And then there's always the issue of observation for me. It makes me nervous to know someone's evaluating me based on rules I'm not familiar with. I get paranoid: "What if this school isn't like the other school, University X, that liked this method of explaining A? What if University Y prefers the B explanation? And what if University Y is like that other University Z whose administrator told me I didn't dress appropriately and should wear suits to command authority in the classroom?" And so on and so on ad nauseum until it becomes clear I'm going to have to pack a supply of Imodium in my school bag just in case my jitters start performing on my intestines.
I start preparing the day before, going over the lesson I want to teach in my head over and over again to be sure I've got it down. I think about the many different ways I could reach my goal. Usually instead of planning my lesson to the letter, I make "goals" for myself to reach by the end of the class period. So I have a starting point, and ending point, and a pretty clear idea how I'm going to get there, but I like to give myself some wiggle room, you know, in case students have questions or I think of something useful while I'm talking or conversing. So I did all of this mental work on Tuesday in my head to prepare for teaching class on Wednesday.
I teach my 9:00 class and everything goes well. I have to pee about 86 times afterwards, and I walk into my 11:00 class expecting to meet a foreign body, but no one shows up. My lesson went very, very well, which is a small consolation. Afterwards I trek to the English department building and explain no one observed my class today: "Well that's weird. I wonder what happened. Let's schedule you for another day."
Great.
Wash.
Rinse.
Repeat.
I'm hoping that thinking about my next observation day won't leave me feeling so anxious. Maybe I'll be just a tiny bit "over it" and I won't stress out so much. But in between then and now is spring break, visiting Ellen's parents' beach house on Little Gasparilla island, and dissertation work.
I need to act more like Starbuck and not worry so much about pleasing authority figures. Starbuck kicks ass. Oh, and that dumb song that goes, "Don't you wish your girlfriend was hot like me?" The lyrics have changed, so take note: "Don't you wish your girlfriend watched BSG?"
I start preparing the day before, going over the lesson I want to teach in my head over and over again to be sure I've got it down. I think about the many different ways I could reach my goal. Usually instead of planning my lesson to the letter, I make "goals" for myself to reach by the end of the class period. So I have a starting point, and ending point, and a pretty clear idea how I'm going to get there, but I like to give myself some wiggle room, you know, in case students have questions or I think of something useful while I'm talking or conversing. So I did all of this mental work on Tuesday in my head to prepare for teaching class on Wednesday.
I teach my 9:00 class and everything goes well. I have to pee about 86 times afterwards, and I walk into my 11:00 class expecting to meet a foreign body, but no one shows up. My lesson went very, very well, which is a small consolation. Afterwards I trek to the English department building and explain no one observed my class today: "Well that's weird. I wonder what happened. Let's schedule you for another day."
Great.
Wash.
Rinse.
Repeat.
I'm hoping that thinking about my next observation day won't leave me feeling so anxious. Maybe I'll be just a tiny bit "over it" and I won't stress out so much. But in between then and now is spring break, visiting Ellen's parents' beach house on Little Gasparilla island, and dissertation work.
I need to act more like Starbuck and not worry so much about pleasing authority figures. Starbuck kicks ass. Oh, and that dumb song that goes, "Don't you wish your girlfriend was hot like me?" The lyrics have changed, so take note: "Don't you wish your girlfriend watched BSG?"