Like sitting on a cloud. Cheerful.
Dear LiveJournal,
Its been about 2 weeks after me and Amelia started to see each other. Its not serious, nor is it something not worth chasing. She sends me to the most ADORABLE text messages in the world. lol. Leaving work at 1am, dead tired, and I dont even go home. I travel the 10 miles across downtown to see her, and it feels good to do so. Then I drive back home dozing off on the road, and I dont mind it, cuz seeing her in her PJs was worthwhile. xD She isnt afraid to let me know what she feels inside of her. Nor am I. And that just makes the big difference in this. We are not afraid to speak what the mind and heart have to say. Of course, letting it all just sit inside can be murderous. Or so I have experianced. So maybe I have hit the bigtime here, and not having to go through the stupid bullshit of having to trust with a stretch of 5000 miles between one another. I miss her lips on mine, already. What prolly makes me the happiest is that I would figure the guy goes to the girl to give her the first hug of the day. Nope. She gives it to me. And it makes me fly. Up high. In the sky. Its no lie. No more rhymes. Ive met her mother, very cool woman. Met her friends, who are equally as psychotic as Amelia herself. lol. Great people. Havent been surrounded with so much friendliness in such a long while.
Aside from meeting her, it seems my life has turned itself upside down once again. Enough to say thst I am now back to normal. Back to the way things used to be. I was happy with life, work, money, God giving me everything to live for, and being there for me 24/7. I have no complaints. A few gripes. Shyt I cannot handle, though. Theyll come and go. So Id like to welcome myself back to the normal world once again. Nice to meet you, everyone. Feels good to be back. I love you all. =]
[fresh air...]
Dear Claire,
For the record, I dont need to seek revenge on you, I already have. Without doing anything. You wouldnt understand unless you start to see life outside the box. All I can do now is just enjoy the ride. =]
And dont you worry. I still have lots to say. Big difference between you and me, I have no remorse to say it still, regardless whats going on around me. God knows that all of this is not going to stay inside my mind forever, so little by little its going to leak out. It can last for years. But you know what? It doesnt matter, at least to me, cuz I dont care. And I never will. At least, from this point on.
Your rants may have not been singled out for me, but mine are certainly singled out for you. You can block this out as much as you want, but you know damn well that this crawls in the back of your mind. And it will continue to do so, becuz I am not one of those people you wanna just throw around like a fucking ball. You started the fire. Not once, but twice. The first time I was weak enough to forgive and forget and I gave you that other chance. People like you that like to manipulate shyt always gets the shortest straw. Always. Its unavoidable. Seems like you have had the worst luck of them all, seeing that picking out short straws has become a habit.
Regarding these packages I have. Yes, I did finally receive it. No, I did not open it. The way you asked for me to at AT LEAST keep it all thrown in the back of my closet is not going to happen. They are both being shipped out today. Just as I promised, becuz I actually keep promises. I am not ready to keep something from you. Its like trying to chase a heart thats made of coal. Its just not healthy. At least for me. Pretty much calling you unsanitary to little boys hearts and life itself.
heh.
So much for "not finished with fighting".
Feels good to say "I told you so."
-Good ol jolly me. <3