(no subject)
I really hate how my parents always manage to make me feel like shit. I really do try my best to please them and yet it never is good enough. Today I found myself arguing with them because they were bitching how I "never spend time with them". I see my parents everyday and night..isnt that enough? Then they tell me that they don't think they are going to let me go to Las Vegas with them because of my grades and my attitude. To be honest I really don't care if I go or not because we have went there every summer for the 5 past years. I am so sick of that damn place and they are the only ones who have the fun there.
I had soccer today. I am really happy at the way I have been playing lately. I feel so relaxed when I play soccer. It is like my escape from the world. The only part about soccer that stresses me out is that I see my ex at the end of every practice. I like seeing him but it hurts that he wont even talk or look at me now. I wish so badly that things would change between us but I know that my chances of that happening are not very good. I think he is seeing someone now anyway. I just wish I knew for sure if he was or not. I don't blame him for not wanting me. I mean look at me I am fat, ugly, suck at everything I do, annoying and I am as "dumb as rocks" as my parents put it. I wish I could just change everything about myself. No one wants me and no one ever will.
I had soccer today. I am really happy at the way I have been playing lately. I feel so relaxed when I play soccer. It is like my escape from the world. The only part about soccer that stresses me out is that I see my ex at the end of every practice. I like seeing him but it hurts that he wont even talk or look at me now. I wish so badly that things would change between us but I know that my chances of that happening are not very good. I think he is seeing someone now anyway. I just wish I knew for sure if he was or not. I don't blame him for not wanting me. I mean look at me I am fat, ugly, suck at everything I do, annoying and I am as "dumb as rocks" as my parents put it. I wish I could just change everything about myself. No one wants me and no one ever will.