(no subject)
Okay it's about 6 in the morning and i've woken up from my drunken stuper which i want to say was one of my most drunkest moments here at UA. But on some real shit son i heard something last night that i did and didnt want to hear!! And now i haev decided so say "Fuck it!!" in a big way, well at least for me anyway!! I can't get deep into it right now but what i would like to do is post a little something i wrote about 4 years ago when i was a freshmen((ah the good ol days of being completely oblivious and carefree!!!)) Hopefully you'll understand a little bit((or a lot)) and see how i feel:
Why I Hold On:
It engages me rarely but when it does it seems as if it refuses to stop
I do not know why I continue to let it slowly pick at my insides
It's like I'm letting myself be tortured to the point of my own extinction
But it stays because it knows that I believe if I endure it that one day
I'll be lavished with rewards
But there is no reward for it in the end
I'm dragging myself along blinded by being optimistic
The grass is not always greener on the other side
The road is not always covered with gold bricks
And the storm cannot always be weathered
It pushes me off the edge of my own cliff
But will I fall into my personal hell or will I defy every known fact
And ascend to the Heavens where not that many reside
But to do so i must break this chain
And loosen my grip on this boulder of despair
But still I ask myself what makes me hold on
If it makes me break inside
It's hope and hope must die for me to live
Now hopefully you understand exactly what i mean in this little poem of mine!!
And all i want to say is that i'm through with it!! I've been chasing a fucking rainbow or some shit like that!!! But my new point of view on this subject has lead me to the best solution and i'm gonna fucking run full speed with it cause its the right thing to do!!! It was never gonna be reciprocated!! As bad as i wanted it to, it was never gonna be given back to me equally!! So thats all i have to say about that if something else pops up during the day i'll come back and edit this post but as of now thats all i can think about so holla back yo!!!!!
Me and justin are so damn funny it's just too hilarious to me!!!!
Why I Hold On:
It engages me rarely but when it does it seems as if it refuses to stop
I do not know why I continue to let it slowly pick at my insides
It's like I'm letting myself be tortured to the point of my own extinction
But it stays because it knows that I believe if I endure it that one day
I'll be lavished with rewards
But there is no reward for it in the end
I'm dragging myself along blinded by being optimistic
The grass is not always greener on the other side
The road is not always covered with gold bricks
And the storm cannot always be weathered
It pushes me off the edge of my own cliff
But will I fall into my personal hell or will I defy every known fact
And ascend to the Heavens where not that many reside
But to do so i must break this chain
And loosen my grip on this boulder of despair
But still I ask myself what makes me hold on
If it makes me break inside
It's hope and hope must die for me to live
Now hopefully you understand exactly what i mean in this little poem of mine!!
And all i want to say is that i'm through with it!! I've been chasing a fucking rainbow or some shit like that!!! But my new point of view on this subject has lead me to the best solution and i'm gonna fucking run full speed with it cause its the right thing to do!!! It was never gonna be reciprocated!! As bad as i wanted it to, it was never gonna be given back to me equally!! So thats all i have to say about that if something else pops up during the day i'll come back and edit this post but as of now thats all i can think about so holla back yo!!!!!
Me and justin are so damn funny it's just too hilarious to me!!!!