he's wrong, I'm right. now back to sobbing.
Well, what a shitty night it's been.
STILL sick. Had a fight, triggered by J realizing he'd lost the iPad. Panic attack. "I read your note." Okay, lets do this. Why am I just staring and blinking? Because you're panicking and nothing I say will make it better. Why did I write you a note instead of talking to you directly? Are you going to let me finish a single sentence or continue to shove words in my mouth?
I have to admit there's an unhealthy gratification I get from being in relationships with emotionally stunted guys who clearly don't have their heads on straight, so that I can feel well-adjusted in comparison. But it gets tiresome. Sometimes, I yearn for actual growth in a relationship, rather than the status quo of keeping the peace by shutting the hell up.
I need my own space because I have to set boundaries and have them honored. This gets met with the ultimatum, that moving out would be regressive and there would be no turning back for him. I should not even be with a guy who thinks that way, so, fair enough. Sigh. I will be relieved, first. But for now, the crying resumes.
STILL sick. Had a fight, triggered by J realizing he'd lost the iPad. Panic attack. "I read your note." Okay, lets do this. Why am I just staring and blinking? Because you're panicking and nothing I say will make it better. Why did I write you a note instead of talking to you directly? Are you going to let me finish a single sentence or continue to shove words in my mouth?
I have to admit there's an unhealthy gratification I get from being in relationships with emotionally stunted guys who clearly don't have their heads on straight, so that I can feel well-adjusted in comparison. But it gets tiresome. Sometimes, I yearn for actual growth in a relationship, rather than the status quo of keeping the peace by shutting the hell up.
I need my own space because I have to set boundaries and have them honored. This gets met with the ultimatum, that moving out would be regressive and there would be no turning back for him. I should not even be with a guy who thinks that way, so, fair enough. Sigh. I will be relieved, first. But for now, the crying resumes.