my comment is too long so i have to post it in 2 parts
There’s no telling if Kai used to deal by raping women the way he claimed his first day riding. He reminded me of a snake-everything about his demeanor was slick and cunning, and five minutes of listening to his suave smooth-talk bullshit made it easy for me to decide not to trust him so easily. There’s also no telling if Kai hadn’t simply “bought himself a whore” because he was too poor to do so. way to break my heart right in the beginning
But that’s all assuming that Yixing is merciful enough to try and kill me. i like this line, but probably because im looking into it more than im supposed to. its like luhan is suicidal, but he isn't going to let someone be his god. if he's going to die, its going to be on his terms, and he won't have someone else looming over him with a knife or whatever. they could try to kill him all they wanted, but just because he wants to die doesn't mean he's going to let them. luhan is his own god-- which halfway gives into his sorta double
( ... )
“You don’t want to do that.” i-i like how luhan is trying to protect him. to protect them all. cries.
“It’s funny. I loved her so much, and she made me so happy, that one day I killed her.” i've always been obsessed with this notion that people become so possessive and fall so deeply in love that they kill the person they love and admire for so many different reasons. so that no one else will look at them, touch them, love them the way they do. so that they can finally, truly, own them.
"If my lips curve into a smile, you run. Do you understand me?" because the only time luhan will ever truly be happy and un-numb is when he's taking possession of what he loves, of what's rightfully his.
Baekhyun moves his hand to stroke Kyungsoo’s cheek, fingers brushing light and delicate. “Who do you take after in your family? Did your mom give you those lips, or was it your dad? What about your eyebrows?” this whole fucking part had my heart beating in my chest please teach me how to write like this i can't do suspense or anything of the sort
( ... )
Oh wow thank you so much!! I'm glad the first-person worked out alright, it is pretty uncommon in fanfic writing but it just ended up being a better fit for this fic so good thing it turned out okay! i'm really happy you liked it ;;
Comments 4
There’s no telling if Kai used to deal by raping women the way he claimed his first day riding. He reminded me of a snake-everything about his demeanor was slick and cunning, and five minutes of listening to his suave smooth-talk bullshit made it easy for me to decide not to trust him so easily. There’s also no telling if Kai hadn’t simply “bought himself a whore” because he was too poor to do so.
way to break my heart right in the beginning
But that’s all assuming that Yixing is merciful enough to try and kill me.
i like this line, but probably because im looking into it more than im supposed to. its like luhan is suicidal, but he isn't going to let someone be his god. if he's going to die, its going to be on his terms, and he won't have someone else looming over him with a knife or whatever. they could try to kill him all they wanted, but just because he wants to die doesn't mean he's going to let them. luhan is his own god-- which halfway gives into his sorta double ( ... )
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i-i like how luhan is trying to protect him. to protect them all. cries.
“It’s funny. I loved her so much, and she made me so happy, that one day I killed her.”
i've always been obsessed with this notion that people become so possessive and fall so deeply in love that they kill the person they love and admire for so many different reasons. so that no one else will look at them, touch them, love them the way they do. so that they can finally, truly, own them.
"If my lips curve into a smile, you run. Do you understand me?"
because the only time luhan will ever truly be happy and un-numb is when he's taking possession of what he loves, of what's rightfully his.
Baekhyun moves his hand to stroke Kyungsoo’s cheek, fingers brushing light and delicate. “Who do you take after in your family? Did your mom give you those lips, or was it your dad? What about your eyebrows?” this whole fucking part had my heart beating in my chest please teach me how to write like this i can't do suspense or anything of the sort ( ... )
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