Post-Full Moon Revelations: Closed RP for Remus and Sirius
((Backdated to the day after the full moon, which was a day or two ago))
Remus’s transformation had come and gone, and now he was sleeping quietly, undoubtedly exhausted from the pain of having his entire bone structure shift twice in one night. After helping him into bed, Sirius had napped with him, but after a couple of hours, Sirius couldn’t sleep any more, and so he got up and made himself some tea.
Truth be told, Sirius was feeling rather uneasy. He had been feeling this way for a while now, but hadn’t said anything to anyone, not wanting to turn what was bothering him into a reality by sharing it with anyone else. But instead of getting better, the feeling had only become worse.
It had started as a little pinch somewhere deep in Sirius’s mind, and whenever it started to make its presence known, Sirius would immediately distract himself with bigger, louder thoughts, or sometimes random words or phrases muttered out loud, for as long as it took for the sensation to sink in and re-bury itself. It was a survival technique he had used in Azkaban, except for the opposite effect of suppressing positive thoughts in favour of miserable ones in order to keep the Dementors at bay.
But the uneasiness had been getting stronger for quite some time, and Sirius was having to work harder and harder at ignoring the pinch and then tucking it away once again. And ever since James had arrived at Hogwarts, Sirius had become progressively calmer as his guilt and deep sense of loss finally began to heal, weakening his ability and resolve to push his problems away entirely.
It was ironic, then, that it was the one person whose presence had helped Sirius start to mend who was also the cause of the uneasiness itself.
James.
Something had been off from the beginning, from the time James had arrived at Hogwarts. Some things hadn’t quite matched up with Sirius’s memories, with the way he would have expected James to act. But at the time, Sirius had been so worked up, so ecstatic, so crazy, that the differences had been easy to push aside and ignore. James had come back, and none of that had mattered to Sirius. He would take his best friend back in any form or state of mind.
But then things had started to get really strange, and the nagging feeling had become stronger. And now, the stillness of the morning and the closeness he always felt towards Remus after going through the trauma of the full moon with him were tempting him to say something about it to Remus, just to get it off his chest.
For a few minutes, Sirius stared at Remus, alternately opening and closing his mouth, wanting desperately to speak, but stopping himself before the words could form.
Finally, he whispered, “Moony? You awake?”
Remus’s transformation had come and gone, and now he was sleeping quietly, undoubtedly exhausted from the pain of having his entire bone structure shift twice in one night. After helping him into bed, Sirius had napped with him, but after a couple of hours, Sirius couldn’t sleep any more, and so he got up and made himself some tea.
Truth be told, Sirius was feeling rather uneasy. He had been feeling this way for a while now, but hadn’t said anything to anyone, not wanting to turn what was bothering him into a reality by sharing it with anyone else. But instead of getting better, the feeling had only become worse.
It had started as a little pinch somewhere deep in Sirius’s mind, and whenever it started to make its presence known, Sirius would immediately distract himself with bigger, louder thoughts, or sometimes random words or phrases muttered out loud, for as long as it took for the sensation to sink in and re-bury itself. It was a survival technique he had used in Azkaban, except for the opposite effect of suppressing positive thoughts in favour of miserable ones in order to keep the Dementors at bay.
But the uneasiness had been getting stronger for quite some time, and Sirius was having to work harder and harder at ignoring the pinch and then tucking it away once again. And ever since James had arrived at Hogwarts, Sirius had become progressively calmer as his guilt and deep sense of loss finally began to heal, weakening his ability and resolve to push his problems away entirely.
It was ironic, then, that it was the one person whose presence had helped Sirius start to mend who was also the cause of the uneasiness itself.
James.
Something had been off from the beginning, from the time James had arrived at Hogwarts. Some things hadn’t quite matched up with Sirius’s memories, with the way he would have expected James to act. But at the time, Sirius had been so worked up, so ecstatic, so crazy, that the differences had been easy to push aside and ignore. James had come back, and none of that had mattered to Sirius. He would take his best friend back in any form or state of mind.
But then things had started to get really strange, and the nagging feeling had become stronger. And now, the stillness of the morning and the closeness he always felt towards Remus after going through the trauma of the full moon with him were tempting him to say something about it to Remus, just to get it off his chest.
For a few minutes, Sirius stared at Remus, alternately opening and closing his mouth, wanting desperately to speak, but stopping himself before the words could form.
Finally, he whispered, “Moony? You awake?”