application for Kyo Sohma, Fruits Basket anime and manga
A tall, slim but well muscled youth with orange hair and a guarded expression walks into the Hogwarts Sorting Room. He picks up the application, sits down at a table and writes out his answers. He sticks his pen behind his ear and offers the paper to whoever comes in.
1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?
I don't really eat much cheese, but Tohru makes this nice thing with cauliflower and cheese melted on top so I guess whatever that is is my favourite.
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?
I don't know who these people are, but I'm a pretty good fighter so I could probably take out both of them, if I had to. I wouldn't kill them though, just defeat them.
3. What time is it where you are?
Uh, sorry I don't wear a watch. I think about mid afternoon in Japan.
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.
Sexual harassment is something perverts do, and I'm NOT a pervert!
...
I guess if there was someone there that Dumbledore loved and they loved him back, it'd be alright though.
5. If you are pushing to be in:
A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.
Zodiac Bar. I guess, or maybe "Outside the Inner Circle" would be better. Aw, no that's a crap name. I'll stick with Zodiac.
B. Gryffindor - Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
This is kinda weird, so there are two people that Harry wants to be with but he can't chooose? *reads question again* Wait, these are all guys? I don't think he can marry either. That's crazy.
C. Ravenclaw - You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.
Jeeze, I don't know! These questions are pretty weird. Maybe one of your annoying cousins is messing with you and you should just ignore it. Or beat them up.
D. Hufflepuff - Prove you are not useless.
Useless!? I'm not useless! I am a martial artist. I guess I can cook okay too, nothing really special but it's alright if there's no one better at cooking around. Cats really like me too, does that count?
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe. Do not threaten us rather than offering a bribe. A threat indicates you either don't really want to be here, or don't have enough sense to answer the question properly. The hat will automatically squib you, regardless of other votes, if you do.
I have to bribe you to get into school? I guess this is like tuition yeah? Well, I get a bit of money from the Sohmas so I can pay the tuition. I guess if people are hungry I could make them onigiri or if anyone wants to spar, I'd be happy to do that too.
1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?
I don't really eat much cheese, but Tohru makes this nice thing with cauliflower and cheese melted on top so I guess whatever that is is my favourite.
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?
I don't know who these people are, but I'm a pretty good fighter so I could probably take out both of them, if I had to. I wouldn't kill them though, just defeat them.
3. What time is it where you are?
Uh, sorry I don't wear a watch. I think about mid afternoon in Japan.
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.
Sexual harassment is something perverts do, and I'm NOT a pervert!
...
I guess if there was someone there that Dumbledore loved and they loved him back, it'd be alright though.
5. If you are pushing to be in:
A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.
Zodiac Bar. I guess, or maybe "Outside the Inner Circle" would be better. Aw, no that's a crap name. I'll stick with Zodiac.
B. Gryffindor - Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
This is kinda weird, so there are two people that Harry wants to be with but he can't chooose? *reads question again* Wait, these are all guys? I don't think he can marry either. That's crazy.
C. Ravenclaw - You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.
Jeeze, I don't know! These questions are pretty weird. Maybe one of your annoying cousins is messing with you and you should just ignore it. Or beat them up.
D. Hufflepuff - Prove you are not useless.
Useless!? I'm not useless! I am a martial artist. I guess I can cook okay too, nothing really special but it's alright if there's no one better at cooking around. Cats really like me too, does that count?
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe. Do not threaten us rather than offering a bribe. A threat indicates you either don't really want to be here, or don't have enough sense to answer the question properly. The hat will automatically squib you, regardless of other votes, if you do.
I have to bribe you to get into school? I guess this is like tuition yeah? Well, I get a bit of money from the Sohmas so I can pay the tuition. I guess if people are hungry I could make them onigiri or if anyone wants to spar, I'd be happy to do that too.