Muninn to Stephen, heavily warded

[nopower_overme]

Comments

*heavily warded reply, some time later, via house-elf*

[estebanmd]

Have you heard of popcorn?

-S.

*heavily warded reply, via same house-elf*

[nopower_overme]

Stephen,

Yes. Why, are you trying new sn... Wait, you mean the curse or whatever it is that people keep coming in and out of, right?

Is this a rhetorical question?

Sarah

*heavily warded reply, via same house-elf*

[estebanmd]

Yes.

And no.

-S.

Re: *heavily warded reply, via same house-elf*

[nopower_overme]

Then why are you asking me ab...

Oh God no.

Please let me be wrong, oh please.

Re: *heavily warded reply, via same house-elf*

[estebanmd]

Yes.

-S.

Re: *heavily warded reply, via same house-elf*

[nopower_overme]

[noticeable ink splotches, the word 'No' heavily scratched out, marks that could be tear stains]

When?

I am

But they come ba

Stephen, I am so, so sorry. I know it means nothing, but I am.

Where are you now? Do you need me to come me to stay away anything? Whatever it is, whenever you need it. You know you only have to ask. I want to leave and come find you so much right now.

Sarah

*heavily warded reply, via same house-elf*

[estebanmd]

*the quill has bitten deeply into the paper*

They come back changed when they come back at all. This is not a bloody holiday jaunt she has taken. I will thank you not to pretend it is one.

Re: *heavily warded reply, via same house-elf*

[nopower_overme]

I'm not pretending it is.

Do you need anything that I can do or get for you? Are you in your room?

*heavily warded reply, via same house-elf*

[estebanmd]

No.

Re: *heavily warded reply, via same house-elf*

[nopower_overme]

Then where are you?

I just want to see you, then I'll go away if that's what you want.

Please just let me be there for you. I'm only pushing because I love you, even as much as I know I should be careful of that right now. I'm so sorry this happened.

Sarah

*heavily warded reply, via same house-elf*

[estebanmd]

That is not a good idea.

-S.

Re: *heavily warded reply, via same house-elf*

[nopower_overme]

Probably not, but hardly anything ever is. It doesn't change that I want to see you. I'm worried, Stephen, and I'm only being honest about it because I am. I don't know what this is like for you, I would never begin to say I did know, but I want to be there for you no matter how bad this is. I can deal with whatever comes after me going where you are.

Please.

- Sarah

*heavily warded reply, via same house-elf*

[estebanmd]

I need to be alone. Surely you can understand that.

-S.

Re: *heavily warded reply, via same house-elf*

[nopower_overme]

I can, and I do. You do need time that is yours alone. I just want to make sure you know I will come when you need me. That...

I just need to know that you aren't going to push me away forever.

Though I had to fight it, I refuse to strike that line above out and make you look at it through the line. It might be stupid and selfish but, I needed to write it. I can wait until you are ready to have me near if I know that there will be a time when you will. So much for never letting myself need an expectation.

We can always write, it seems to work for us. Write me whatever you want, if you want, I'll be here to respond. I'm not going to give up on you. Even if I want to be there now.

- Sarah

*heavily warded reply, via same house-elf*

[estebanmd]

Forever is such an ugly word.

-S.

Re: *heavily warded reply, via same house-elf*

[nopower_overme]

And probably an inappropriate word for the situation, but I make mistakes.

You do need time that isn't full of more worries, and I know I'm something that causes many worries. I just don't want to see time pass and it hurt you more for it. I don't want to give you time when I should have pressed the issue, but I don't want to press the issue, be wrong and make you hate me.

- Sarah