James's reassurances were helpful, as was his touch on Sirius's head. Still, Sirius found himself wishing things could be different, that there wasn't anything to work out, that when James looked at Sirius, he saw the person he always knew, the person Sirius felt like. Maybe if he got an old photograph, he could try to cut his hair back to the way it was during his schooldays. It would be a small gesture, but perhaps it would help.
He put one hand tentatively on James's arm. "Yeah...we'll work it out. Just...don't Levicorpus me again, all right? I promise I won't hurt you." He sighed and let James hold him for a bit.
"You sober enough for more drink?" Sirius pulled out of James's grasp to grab the vodka bottle. He swallowed some and passed it to James. "Actually, I haven't got any porn. Left it all in America. But anyway, it was all Muggle porn, so the pictures didn't even move. Not very exciting. Maybe your old stash is still hidden somewhere around here? I think I remember us placing a concealment charm on a rather large stack of magazines when McGonagall decided to perform a surprise sweep of our room. Did we ever get it back, or did we just leave it in whatever corner we hid it in?"
"I'm still soaked enough for more drink." He said with a smile, relaxing as Sirius moved his arm off.
He knew Padfoot wouldn't hurt him. There was no need to say it. It was just the differences, that was all. But he didn't say anything at all. Instead James stayed where he was, with them curled forward into each other, and took a long drink from the bottle, leaving the last for Sirius.
"Y'know what'd go well with this? Firewhiskey? You hiding any firewhiskey, Pads? That's loads more fun than dusty twenty years old porn." So maybe he was just a little bit more eager than usual to get completely pissfaced.
Sirius gulped down the rest of the vodka and then lazily banished the bottle to the bedside table. "You're asking me if I'm hiding any Firewhisky? Such a question shouldn't even need to be asked." Squirming a bit, Sirius reached into his robes and pulled out a fairly sizeable flask. "I've got more down in the Slytherin suite, but I always make sure I'm carrying something." He uncapped it and offered it to James.
"Hey, Prongs? Wanna know something pathetic? You'd think that, with my being twenty years older than you, I'd have had that much more sex. But I really haven't. All those years in Azkaban and then on the run...no sex. And then I was living with Moony in my family's house for a year, but he didn't want to do it, and frankly, I was too depressed for it, if you can believe that. It was only this past year that I finally managed to get a decent, regular shag. Now that's a true travesty of justice, I say." He held out his hand, waiting for the flask.
"How does every conversation we have, end up involving your dick, Pads? It's the circle of life, and it all comes right back down to Black pecker. It's some sort of magic curse, isn't it. You can tell me."
He took a long pull of the flask, and then sighed, letting the world get that much warmer, fuzzier and blurry.
"And I'm sorry Moony wouldn't give you his arse, mate. But it is his to do with as he pleases and if he's goin' hog it all. Well, that's what he'll do."
"Hey, your willy is the one that's produced life, not mine. And that's probably a good thing. I, for one, am of the opinion that the Black bloodline needs to cease as soon as possible. I'm just happy to have Harry. That's enough for me." This was completely true. In many ways, Harry was far more precious to Sirius than his own child ever could have been.
Sirius nabbed the flask from James and took his own deep swallow. "I wasn't asking for Moony's arse. I was perfectly willing to give him mine, but the bastard refused. And you know why? Because of my own cousin!" Sirius laughed. "I guess that means he's still dipping his stick somewhere in the family. At least he chose a decent branch of it."
Sirius fell silent for a moment. Then, in a softer voice, he said, "Prongs? What do you plan to do now that you're here? I mean, do you want to take classes? Or do you want to play pranks? Or do you just kind of want to see where each day takes you?"
He rolled his eyes and sighed. "Gonna make me bloody think aren't you. Tosser." James shrugged. "Should finish final year. Take my NEWTS. So I guess all the bloody classes. Won't make much difference anyway, I was in classes before I ended up here."
He stretched a bit and sighed. "But if I don't have to sign up right away...There's some things I need to do first." Like visit his parent's grave, find out who else had died and how and why. Not to mention catch up on 20 years of wizarding history.
"Bit of all really, in the end." James managed a smile. "Told Weasley I'd help him get a Malfoy." The tension that had been building, lessened a bit at that thought.
Sirius kicked the covers down a bit. One thing he could say in Slytherin's favour was that the temperature was often nice and cool down there. Up in Gryffindor Tower, the air could get stuffy and stifling, especially during the warmer months. He missed the Muggle air conditioning system he had in Reno...although he supposed he could probably cast a charm to do something similar...but nah. Once again, laziness (and a bit of a buzz) ruled the day.
He took another swallow of Firewhisky. "I dunno if they still offer N.E.W.T.s, mate. The school's changed a lot. Classes aren't held very often, and some of the professors aren't even human, let alone wizards." Not caring at all about classes himself, Sirius hadn't really been bothered by these things, but if James was intent on finishing his magical education, well...it might not be what he expected. "In fact, I'm not sure I recommend signing up for Arithmancy. The professor's a bit...off-kilter." Sirius had enjoyed the time he had spent with Homsar, but considering that he had understood not a single word that had come out of that bloke's (was he even a bloke?) mouth (that opening in his face where his voice came out of--it was a mouth, right?), he couldn't imagine sitting through an entire class with him.
Sirius offered the Firewhisky back to James. "What sort of things do you want to do first? This Malfoy business, you mean? Are you talking about my cousin's son? What's the situation there?"
"Cousin's son? Which cousin of yours bedded a Malfoy and had his child?!" He pushed himself up on one elbow, peering over at Sirius, eyes slightly serious. James wouldn't mock a Black that Padfoot actually liked; though as a whole he tought the entire lot of them should fall down a well somewhere and get accosted anally by trolls.
His eyes searched Padfoot'd face, trying so hard to see his old friend amid what time, stress and the Dementors had done. For a moment James completely forgot about trying to get his N.E.W.T.s.
Sirius plumped up his pillow and then turned over a bit to face James. "Narcissa, of course. She and Lucius Malfoy. He's popcorn now, but Cissa and her son Draco aren't. In fact, Draco is one of the Gryffindor Prefects. Don't really know him myself, although I got the impression that Harry doesn't really like him." Sirius paused. He didn't quite know what to tell James about his relationship with Cissa, because he himself was still working out exactly what it was. For a little bit, he busied himself by brushing away a non-existent speck of dirt on the pillowcase.
When the silence got uncomfortable, he finally said, "You know...Cissa...she's...well, we're talking now." He thought back to his conversation with Cissa on the Secrets Board and tried to find a way to explain it to James. Finally, he just decided to blurt out what exactly it was that had touched him so much about Cissa's efforts to re-establish a relationship. "She said she still loves me."
It was a lot of information to take in. James had seen Cissa, briefly. There hadn't been a chance to evaluate where she stood. The knowledge that she'd married a Death Eater and was herself related to the Blacks was more than enough to make him frown, especially when Sirius mentioned what she'd said.
James shrugged, non-committal."Always said you were a lovable git. Figures sooner or later a Black would realize that." The twist, slight as it was, to his words suggested that James thought it was a ploy but he'd give the benefit of the doubt.
Almost without thinking about it, he hooked a leg around Padfoot to draw him closer. James was tense, Harry didn't seem the type to dislike someone unjustly, not after all he'd been through. And Ron had had more than enough to say about Draco as well. Stilll, perhaps he should have a talk with Cissa. Older or not, no one toyed with Padfoot, not after all Sirius had been through.
Hearing James say the words 'a Black' made Sirius feel very strange. It was his last name, but as a concept, a family...well, that was something from which he had disengaged himself a long time ago. To him, and seemingly to James as well, the Blacks were a completely separate entity from what Sirius was. And having Cissa back in the picture complicated the lines he had drawn in his mind so many years ago. Where once there was only, well, black and white, now there were grey areas. Cissa's efforts to reconnect with him truly were a delightful development to him, but they did throw off all of the mental barriers he had built against his family throughout his entire life.
Thinking about all this confused him, and so when he felt James's leg wrap itself around him and pull him closer, he willingly moved in and pressed himself alongside James. Idly, he picked up a corner of James's shirt and started twisting it between his fingers. "So much is different around here, Prongs. Even for me. Gryffindors are Slytherins, Slytherins are Gryffindors, the Hufflepuffs are all psycho, the Ravenclaws are drunkards....demons are professors, Moony has a girlfriend, Cissa still loves me...it's a lot to take in, huh, Prongs?" Sirius leaned his head slightly into James's shoulder.
James tried not to think about the longer, leaner, harder body burrowing against his own and focused on Padfoot'd face. He stroked Sirius' hair. "Yeah, mate. A lot."
Staring up at the ceiling, James could just about make out the buttes and support beams of the roof. He sighed, making himself relax. "Aye s'bloody fucking different. But it'd take more than that to take us out, mate."
Sirius stopped playing with James's shirt and rested his hand lightly under it. James was starting to look rather forlorn, and Sirius tried to think of what he could say to reassure him that things would be okay despite all of the changes.
"You've got me, Prongs," Sirius said in a low voice. "That will always be the same, even if the houses are all upside down and everyone else is different from who you remember them to be. I'm the same."
Sirius reached over to brush a piece of James's hair away from his eyes, which were fixed somewhere on the ceiling. Then he remembered something they used to do in school, something James did for him when he was feeling low or put upon, and vice versa, and sometimes something they did for each other just because. Pulling himself up on his elbow, Sirius moved closer to James. Leaning forward slightly, he softly kissed James's lips once, and then a second time. Then, with a bit of a half-smile, he hovered over James, waiting for his usual response - a kiss returned...just something they shared with each other, something that let each other know that everything was okay.
He put one hand tentatively on James's arm. "Yeah...we'll work it out. Just...don't Levicorpus me again, all right? I promise I won't hurt you." He sighed and let James hold him for a bit.
"You sober enough for more drink?" Sirius pulled out of James's grasp to grab the vodka bottle. He swallowed some and passed it to James. "Actually, I haven't got any porn. Left it all in America. But anyway, it was all Muggle porn, so the pictures didn't even move. Not very exciting. Maybe your old stash is still hidden somewhere around here? I think I remember us placing a concealment charm on a rather large stack of magazines when McGonagall decided to perform a surprise sweep of our room. Did we ever get it back, or did we just leave it in whatever corner we hid it in?"
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He knew Padfoot wouldn't hurt him. There was no need to say it. It was just the differences, that was all. But he didn't say anything at all. Instead James stayed where he was, with them curled forward into each other, and took a long drink from the bottle, leaving the last for Sirius.
"Y'know what'd go well with this? Firewhiskey? You hiding any firewhiskey, Pads? That's loads more fun than dusty twenty years old porn." So maybe he was just a little bit more eager than usual to get completely pissfaced.
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"Hey, Prongs? Wanna know something pathetic? You'd think that, with my being twenty years older than you, I'd have had that much more sex. But I really haven't. All those years in Azkaban and then on the run...no sex. And then I was living with Moony in my family's house for a year, but he didn't want to do it, and frankly, I was too depressed for it, if you can believe that. It was only this past year that I finally managed to get a decent, regular shag. Now that's a true travesty of justice, I say." He held out his hand, waiting for the flask.
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He took a long pull of the flask, and then sighed, letting the world get that much warmer, fuzzier and blurry.
"And I'm sorry Moony wouldn't give you his arse, mate. But it is his to do with as he pleases and if he's goin' hog it all. Well, that's what he'll do."
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Sirius nabbed the flask from James and took his own deep swallow. "I wasn't asking for Moony's arse. I was perfectly willing to give him mine, but the bastard refused. And you know why? Because of my own cousin!" Sirius laughed. "I guess that means he's still dipping his stick somewhere in the family. At least he chose a decent branch of it."
Sirius fell silent for a moment. Then, in a softer voice, he said, "Prongs? What do you plan to do now that you're here? I mean, do you want to take classes? Or do you want to play pranks? Or do you just kind of want to see where each day takes you?"
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He stretched a bit and sighed. "But if I don't have to sign up right away...There's some things I need to do first." Like visit his parent's grave, find out who else had died and how and why. Not to mention catch up on 20 years of wizarding history.
"Bit of all really, in the end." James managed a smile. "Told Weasley I'd help him get a Malfoy." The tension that had been building, lessened a bit at that thought.
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He took another swallow of Firewhisky. "I dunno if they still offer N.E.W.T.s, mate. The school's changed a lot. Classes aren't held very often, and some of the professors aren't even human, let alone wizards." Not caring at all about classes himself, Sirius hadn't really been bothered by these things, but if James was intent on finishing his magical education, well...it might not be what he expected. "In fact, I'm not sure I recommend signing up for Arithmancy. The professor's a bit...off-kilter." Sirius had enjoyed the time he had spent with Homsar, but considering that he had understood not a single word that had come out of that bloke's (was he even a bloke?) mouth (that opening in his face where his voice came out of--it was a mouth, right?), he couldn't imagine sitting through an entire class with him.
Sirius offered the Firewhisky back to James. "What sort of things do you want to do first? This Malfoy business, you mean? Are you talking about my cousin's son? What's the situation there?"
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His eyes searched Padfoot'd face, trying so hard to see his old friend amid what time, stress and the Dementors had done. For a moment James completely forgot about trying to get his N.E.W.T.s.
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When the silence got uncomfortable, he finally said, "You know...Cissa...she's...well, we're talking now." He thought back to his conversation with Cissa on the Secrets Board and tried to find a way to explain it to James. Finally, he just decided to blurt out what exactly it was that had touched him so much about Cissa's efforts to re-establish a relationship. "She said she still loves me."
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James shrugged, non-committal."Always said you were a lovable git. Figures sooner or later a Black would realize that." The twist, slight as it was, to his words suggested that James thought it was a ploy but he'd give the benefit of the doubt.
Almost without thinking about it, he hooked a leg around Padfoot to draw him closer. James was tense, Harry didn't seem the type to dislike someone unjustly, not after all he'd been through. And Ron had had more than enough to say about Draco as well. Stilll, perhaps he should have a talk with Cissa. Older or not, no one toyed with Padfoot, not after all Sirius had been through.
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Thinking about all this confused him, and so when he felt James's leg wrap itself around him and pull him closer, he willingly moved in and pressed himself alongside James. Idly, he picked up a corner of James's shirt and started twisting it between his fingers. "So much is different around here, Prongs. Even for me. Gryffindors are Slytherins, Slytherins are Gryffindors, the Hufflepuffs are all psycho, the Ravenclaws are drunkards....demons are professors, Moony has a girlfriend, Cissa still loves me...it's a lot to take in, huh, Prongs?" Sirius leaned his head slightly into James's shoulder.
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Staring up at the ceiling, James could just about make out the buttes and support beams of the roof. He sighed, making himself relax. "Aye s'bloody fucking different. But it'd take more than that to take us out, mate."
He couldn't help sighing again.
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"You've got me, Prongs," Sirius said in a low voice. "That will always be the same, even if the houses are all upside down and everyone else is different from who you remember them to be. I'm the same."
Sirius reached over to brush a piece of James's hair away from his eyes, which were fixed somewhere on the ceiling. Then he remembered something they used to do in school, something James did for him when he was feeling low or put upon, and vice versa, and sometimes something they did for each other just because. Pulling himself up on his elbow, Sirius moved closer to James. Leaning forward slightly, he softly kissed James's lips once, and then a second time. Then, with a bit of a half-smile, he hovered over James, waiting for his usual response - a kiss returned...just something they shared with each other, something that let each other know that everything was okay.
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