Applicant: Mr. Bliss (Derek Landy's "Skulduggery Pleasant", series)
((OOC: Mr. Bliss is taken from the events before his death, during the Battle of Aranmore Farm. This includes his appearances up until the climax of Skulduggery Pleasant: The Faceless Ones (b3). A warning for the possibility of spoilers. Pleasant muns approved.))
He had a huge, intimidating figure and personally known for three main aspects; firstly: His calmness in the face of change; which proved itself now as he surveyed the stone room with his pale eyes. Secondly - and perhaps even thirdly - his political mind and deceptive nature; aspects that also didn't go astray with his sister, China Sorrows, who was the reason for his getting mixed up in all this. Mr. Bliss was a tall man, 6'7'', with broad shoulders and a shaved head, clothed in a fine navy blue suit. His gaze was always a cutting one, an unnerving characteristic. While his sister was the cunning fox, he was the focused hound. She normally found herself cornered by the snake in some predicament - it was his job as the eldest to protect her - putting aside, of course, the multiple times they'd tried to kill each other in the past, with no avail.
He looked down at what he'd been spirited in front of; a desk. On the desk was a roll of parchment, a quill accompanied by its ink well, and by the quill was a white card, bent so it peaked on the desktop. Embossed on it was: Mr. Bliss, in Edwardian Script. He picked it up and read it. It was detailed instructions on how to answer the questionnaire, or rather, the 'Application'. Noting that the quill would react to his voice. He didn't frown, glare or scowl. He didn't even talk. He just took his seat.
State your full name.
"Mr. Bliss." And so the quill wrote.
1. What is your favourite cheese? Why is it your favourite?
"Cheese?" The quill scrawled. "I don't actually eat a lot of cheese."
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?
The quill hovered for a time. "Either one, should the occasion call for it."
3. What time is it where you are?
"It had been about supper when I was taken." And so the quill wrote.
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.
He frowned. "I don't like this question; something like this shouldn't be on an application."
5. If you are pushing to be in:
A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bar-tend, in the dark.
"I don't drink. So I wouldn't think of starting up my own bar in which to name it." And so the quill wrote, finishing by dunking its tip into the ink well.
B. Gryffindor - Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
The question reminded him of number 4. "I don't care who this Harry chooses. It was Fred's and George's mistake to fall for the same man; they should debate it amongst themselves who is best suited for Harry." The quill scratched: Clears throat. "I don't know any mythologies that tell tale of such a romantic triangle."
C. Ravenclaw - You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.
The quill hung for so long that it was no longer poised for writing, its feather anchored it down in the air, its tip pointing up as if it were staring at the ceiling, waiting. Then he spoke, "I expect it to be a very busy job running a... whatever this establishment is. If you are not focused enough, or forever seated an working on the papers, then naturally the work load would increase and be as if you'd never achieved anything. It's just one of those things," and the quill couldn't move fast enough.
D. Hufflepuff - Prove you are not useless.
The quill scrawled: Sighs, and then dunked its tip into the ink well.
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe. Do not threaten us rather than offering a bribe. A threat indicates you either don't really want to be here, or don't have enough sense to answer the question properly. The hat will automatically squib you, regardless of other votes, if you do.
The quill hung over the space under the question. While Bliss was enquiring about China's disappearance he had crossed paths with Mr. Dusk, the troublesome vampire. There had been an exchange of words... perhaps some answers taken with force. Bliss was happy it had gone down, otherwise he wouldn't have anything to offer. He thought on it, what he had wasn't much, and wasn't useful in many ways. From his jacket pocket he took out a syringe, half of its glass body still held the white viscous material that Dusk injected himself with, a suppressant to his vampire transformations. "This could be useful," hardly. He laid it on the desk by the placement card. Then, as a second thought whispered through his mind, he dropped a white tooth next to the syringe. It was long, inches more than a canine, and it was pure white. "A vampire fang." It could be used as potion ingredients, perhaps? And so the quill wrote.
Bliss wasn't going to ask his questions now, not to unoccupied air and a magical, floating Dictaquill that clearly had no vocal cords. He would wait until those whom this application was designed for, came, and then he would ask his summations. The quill drifted over to the ink well and fell into the blackness with a plop!
"I have read the hogwarts_hocus faq, and understand it is a crazy, cracktastic sorting community and RPG. Mr. Bliss.
I have read the hogwarts_hocus rules and agree to abide by each and every one of them. Mr. Bliss.
I agree to be a good sport and not get my knickers in a bunch. Mr. Bliss.
One day, marmalade will rule the world. Mr. Bliss."
He had a huge, intimidating figure and personally known for three main aspects; firstly: His calmness in the face of change; which proved itself now as he surveyed the stone room with his pale eyes. Secondly - and perhaps even thirdly - his political mind and deceptive nature; aspects that also didn't go astray with his sister, China Sorrows, who was the reason for his getting mixed up in all this. Mr. Bliss was a tall man, 6'7'', with broad shoulders and a shaved head, clothed in a fine navy blue suit. His gaze was always a cutting one, an unnerving characteristic. While his sister was the cunning fox, he was the focused hound. She normally found herself cornered by the snake in some predicament - it was his job as the eldest to protect her - putting aside, of course, the multiple times they'd tried to kill each other in the past, with no avail.
He looked down at what he'd been spirited in front of; a desk. On the desk was a roll of parchment, a quill accompanied by its ink well, and by the quill was a white card, bent so it peaked on the desktop. Embossed on it was: Mr. Bliss, in Edwardian Script. He picked it up and read it. It was detailed instructions on how to answer the questionnaire, or rather, the 'Application'. Noting that the quill would react to his voice. He didn't frown, glare or scowl. He didn't even talk. He just took his seat.
State your full name.
"Mr. Bliss." And so the quill wrote.
1. What is your favourite cheese? Why is it your favourite?
"Cheese?" The quill scrawled. "I don't actually eat a lot of cheese."
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?
The quill hovered for a time. "Either one, should the occasion call for it."
3. What time is it where you are?
"It had been about supper when I was taken." And so the quill wrote.
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.
He frowned. "I don't like this question; something like this shouldn't be on an application."
5. If you are pushing to be in:
A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bar-tend, in the dark.
"I don't drink. So I wouldn't think of starting up my own bar in which to name it." And so the quill wrote, finishing by dunking its tip into the ink well.
B. Gryffindor - Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
The question reminded him of number 4. "I don't care who this Harry chooses. It was Fred's and George's mistake to fall for the same man; they should debate it amongst themselves who is best suited for Harry." The quill scratched: Clears throat. "I don't know any mythologies that tell tale of such a romantic triangle."
C. Ravenclaw - You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.
The quill hung for so long that it was no longer poised for writing, its feather anchored it down in the air, its tip pointing up as if it were staring at the ceiling, waiting. Then he spoke, "I expect it to be a very busy job running a... whatever this establishment is. If you are not focused enough, or forever seated an working on the papers, then naturally the work load would increase and be as if you'd never achieved anything. It's just one of those things," and the quill couldn't move fast enough.
D. Hufflepuff - Prove you are not useless.
The quill scrawled: Sighs, and then dunked its tip into the ink well.
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe. Do not threaten us rather than offering a bribe. A threat indicates you either don't really want to be here, or don't have enough sense to answer the question properly. The hat will automatically squib you, regardless of other votes, if you do.
The quill hung over the space under the question. While Bliss was enquiring about China's disappearance he had crossed paths with Mr. Dusk, the troublesome vampire. There had been an exchange of words... perhaps some answers taken with force. Bliss was happy it had gone down, otherwise he wouldn't have anything to offer. He thought on it, what he had wasn't much, and wasn't useful in many ways. From his jacket pocket he took out a syringe, half of its glass body still held the white viscous material that Dusk injected himself with, a suppressant to his vampire transformations. "This could be useful," hardly. He laid it on the desk by the placement card. Then, as a second thought whispered through his mind, he dropped a white tooth next to the syringe. It was long, inches more than a canine, and it was pure white. "A vampire fang." It could be used as potion ingredients, perhaps? And so the quill wrote.
Bliss wasn't going to ask his questions now, not to unoccupied air and a magical, floating Dictaquill that clearly had no vocal cords. He would wait until those whom this application was designed for, came, and then he would ask his summations. The quill drifted over to the ink well and fell into the blackness with a plop!
"I have read the hogwarts_hocus faq, and understand it is a crazy, cracktastic sorting community and RPG. Mr. Bliss.
I have read the hogwarts_hocus rules and agree to abide by each and every one of them. Mr. Bliss.
I agree to be a good sport and not get my knickers in a bunch. Mr. Bliss.
One day, marmalade will rule the world. Mr. Bliss."