((With the approval of the current Who Crew. Spoilers are inevitable.))
Amy Pond was getting used to abrupt arrivals in unfamiliar places, but this time was a bit disturbing. She didn't remember arriving here, and neither The Doctor, Rory, nor the TARDIS were anywhere in sight. The room had a disturbingly castle-y quality that reminded her unpleasantly of Venice.
"Hello?" she called out uncertainly, and was startled to see a quill pen lift of its own accord, taking down the word on a sheet of paper. Once she'd registered the mild surprise, however, she was delighted. What a charming device! Stepping closer to examine this wonder, she noticed the questions on the parchment.
State your full name.
"Amelia Pond," she responded almost automatically, before stopping to wonder who it was asking and why. But she couldn't resist continuing with the form, just to see, to find out.
1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?
"Crowdie," she said with a faint sniff. Actually it wasn't, but she liked people to think it was. Scottish, and all that. Better than affecting a taste for haggis. "Why do I need a reason for it to be my favorite? People like things. It doesn't always have to be deep."
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?
"What?" That was certainly a leap. "From cheese to killing? That's a bit of a steep progression, isn't it? Although I suppose if I had to choose, I'd say Barney." Not that she had any particular grudge against characters on American children's television, but a name like 'Carrottop' prompted a sense of ginger solidarity. If she'd known who he was, her answer might have been different.
3. What time is it where you are?
"Time." Amy laughed weakly. Time wasn't as definite for her as it used to be. "I don't actually know. It does sound silly, doesn't it?"
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.
"What?" Amy exclaimed again, with real outrage this time. Perhaps she was a bit oversensitive on the subject. "I don't... I mean, I wouldn't, I'd never..."
Assuming she hadn't just survived near-certain death.
5. If you are pushing to be in:
A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.
"The Gondola Driver," she said, thinking fondly of Rory.
B. Gryffindor - Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
Ouch... sore subject there. "I'm not an agony aunt, you know," she said with a bit of a pout. "Maybe Harry needs some time to sort it out for himself. You can't let someone else decide that sort of thing for you."
C. Ravenclaw - You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.
"It's just paper, isn't it? If it bothers you so much, get away from it. Get a new job. Move to a new city. Change your life."
D. Hufflepuff - Prove you are not useless.
"Useless?" That was an affront, even moreso when she realized that, while resourceful, she didn't have much in the way of quantifiable skills. "'m not useless," she said with a pout.
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe. Do not threaten us rather than offering a bribe. A threat indicates you either don't really want to be here, or don't have enough sense to answer the question properly. The hat will automatically squib you, regardless of other votes, if you do.
"A bribe?" She looked down at her outfit. Neither the baggy sweater nor tiny miniskirt had pockets. She smiled a bit weakly. "What if I just said 'please'?"
I have read the
hogwarts_hocus faq, and understand it is a crazy, cracktastic sorting community and RPG. ______AP______
I have read the
hogwarts_hocus rules and agree to abide by each and every one of them. _____AP______.
I agree to be a good sport and not get my knickers in a bunch. ______AP_____.
One day, marmalade will rule the world. _______AP______