Application: Dr. Claire Saunders (a.k.a. "Whiskey"), "Dollhouse"
((I'm taking Claire from the end of s2e1, "Vows;" obviously there are spoilers for the last couple eps of s1, where we learned a bit about her history.))
Claire Saunders was running out of excuses.
Imprinted phobias be damned. She drove, crying and shaking and white-knuckling the SUV's steering wheel, as far as a tank of gas would take her in the general direction of "away from the Dollhouse." She finally stopped for the night at a rundown motel on the outskirts of Los Angeles.
Claire has no pop culture references, or she might have noticed the place's resemblance to a key set in "Psycho." Never having seen any Hitchcock, however, she opened the door of the motel, to find not Norman Bates, but the Hogwarts Sorting Room.
"What the..."
Maybe her flight from the Dollhouse was just a hallucination. She'd heard the Attic described as 'like a nightmare you can't wake up from;' surely the kind where you run and run and never get anywhere would qualify? Unconsciously Claire rubbed the scars on her forehead and cheeks, half expecting Alpha to leap out of the shadows with a blade.
She braced herself, put a hand against the writing desk to stabilize herself, and noticed the application. Curious despite herself, she picked up the quill.
State your full name.
"Currently? Dr. Saunders. Claire. Claire Saunders. Before that? I went by "Whiskey," when I wasn't busy being - number one. Before that...I don't want to know what my name was before that."
1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?
"Hmm. Do I have a favorite cheese? Did Topher bother with anything that detailed? Whatever. Swiss seems appropriate. Full of holes."
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?
"I'm a doctor. "First do no harm" and all that. Well, technically I never took the oath, but I feel deeply bound by it nonetheless."
3. What time is it where you are?
"It's "right now." Where I'm from, there's only ever "right now." Actives have no conception of the future, you see, and the past - the past can be taken away from a Doll at any time. For better or worse."
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.
Claire thought of her last encounter with Topher, her sick, doomed seduction scene, and laughed and laughed - a grating, slightly hysterical laugh - then took a swig from a silver flask.
"Next question."
5. If you are pushing to be in:
A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.
"The Infirmary. I'm not really programmed for clever or witty."
B. Gryffindor - Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
"Marriage isn't exactly my department. The whole idea of permanency is not exactly my department."
C. Ravenclaw - You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.
"You work for a major corporation engaged in a shadowy conspiracy to rent out the products of highly unethical bleeding-edge medical technology? Just a guess."
She pushed her hair out of her eyes. "I can give you the best bit of advice I've ever gotten. All those reports you so diligently write up every day, conscientiously including every detail of anything likely to produce problems down the line? Nobody reads those. Just let it go. Live in the now."
D. Hufflepuff - Prove you are not useless.
That laugh again.
"I'm fully qualified in a variety of medical fields, from first aid to major surgery. I've also got quite a nice line in computer skills, strangely enough. Though I've also got a whole raft of phobias designed to keep me stuck in place, but I am - I was - working on that."
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe. Do not threaten us rather than offering a bribe. A threat indicates you either don't really want to be here, or don't have enough sense to answer the question properly. The hat will automatically squib you, regardless of other votes, if you do.
"Lollipop?"
She reached into the pocket of her sensible skirt and produced a handful of colorful candies.
"Hello? Is anyone there? I filled out your little form here. Just one question: Is any of this real?"
I have read the hogwarts_hocus faq, and understand it is a crazy, cracktastic sorting community and RPG. ___Dr._Saunders__
I have read the hogwarts_hocus rules and agree to abide by each and every one of them. __Dr._Saunders__.
I agree to be a good sport and not get my knickers in a bunch. _Ha._No_promises._
One day, marmalade Rossum will rule the world. ___Dr._Saunders__
Claire Saunders was running out of excuses.
Imprinted phobias be damned. She drove, crying and shaking and white-knuckling the SUV's steering wheel, as far as a tank of gas would take her in the general direction of "away from the Dollhouse." She finally stopped for the night at a rundown motel on the outskirts of Los Angeles.
Claire has no pop culture references, or she might have noticed the place's resemblance to a key set in "Psycho." Never having seen any Hitchcock, however, she opened the door of the motel, to find not Norman Bates, but the Hogwarts Sorting Room.
"What the..."
Maybe her flight from the Dollhouse was just a hallucination. She'd heard the Attic described as 'like a nightmare you can't wake up from;' surely the kind where you run and run and never get anywhere would qualify? Unconsciously Claire rubbed the scars on her forehead and cheeks, half expecting Alpha to leap out of the shadows with a blade.
She braced herself, put a hand against the writing desk to stabilize herself, and noticed the application. Curious despite herself, she picked up the quill.
State your full name.
"Currently? Dr. Saunders. Claire. Claire Saunders. Before that? I went by "Whiskey," when I wasn't busy being - number one. Before that...I don't want to know what my name was before that."
1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?
"Hmm. Do I have a favorite cheese? Did Topher bother with anything that detailed? Whatever. Swiss seems appropriate. Full of holes."
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?
"I'm a doctor. "First do no harm" and all that. Well, technically I never took the oath, but I feel deeply bound by it nonetheless."
3. What time is it where you are?
"It's "right now." Where I'm from, there's only ever "right now." Actives have no conception of the future, you see, and the past - the past can be taken away from a Doll at any time. For better or worse."
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.
Claire thought of her last encounter with Topher, her sick, doomed seduction scene, and laughed and laughed - a grating, slightly hysterical laugh - then took a swig from a silver flask.
"Next question."
5. If you are pushing to be in:
A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.
"The Infirmary. I'm not really programmed for clever or witty."
B. Gryffindor - Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
"Marriage isn't exactly my department. The whole idea of permanency is not exactly my department."
C. Ravenclaw - You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.
"You work for a major corporation engaged in a shadowy conspiracy to rent out the products of highly unethical bleeding-edge medical technology? Just a guess."
She pushed her hair out of her eyes. "I can give you the best bit of advice I've ever gotten. All those reports you so diligently write up every day, conscientiously including every detail of anything likely to produce problems down the line? Nobody reads those. Just let it go. Live in the now."
D. Hufflepuff - Prove you are not useless.
That laugh again.
"I'm fully qualified in a variety of medical fields, from first aid to major surgery. I've also got quite a nice line in computer skills, strangely enough. Though I've also got a whole raft of phobias designed to keep me stuck in place, but I am - I was - working on that."
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe. Do not threaten us rather than offering a bribe. A threat indicates you either don't really want to be here, or don't have enough sense to answer the question properly. The hat will automatically squib you, regardless of other votes, if you do.
"Lollipop?"
She reached into the pocket of her sensible skirt and produced a handful of colorful candies.
"Hello? Is anyone there? I filled out your little form here. Just one question: Is any of this real?"
I have read the hogwarts_hocus faq, and understand it is a crazy, cracktastic sorting community and RPG. ___Dr._Saunders__
I have read the hogwarts_hocus rules and agree to abide by each and every one of them. __Dr._Saunders__.
I agree to be a good sport and not get my knickers in a bunch. _Ha._No_promises._
One day, marmalade Rossum will rule the world. ___Dr._Saunders__