Potions Office Hours: Valentine Feels Bored and Scholarly

[degeneratewolfe]

Valentine had some time back returned from his year away, scouring the world for new and interesting substances and experiences. And oh, what a year it had been. But he was here now, back to the large, odd castle and the house elves who cowered justifiably every time he walked by, and life had regained a pace of a sort.

Valentine hated monotony

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[igorofmalaria]

Igor was glad to see Office Hours posted at last. Maybe he could finally get a handle on the way magical chemistry worked, among other things...he held his small vial of contaminated punch closer. Good thing, too or he would have dropped it on seeing the inside of the plant-cluttered office.

It couldn't be- but it was, right down to the lipstick. "Dr. Schadenfreude? You're here too? How?"

[degeneratewolfe]

Oh my. There was some odd-looking creature in his office, acting like it knew him. He smiled as innocently as he was capable of (which was to say, not very) and shook his head. "While the name is an interesting one, you are mistaken. I'm Lord Valentine Wolfe, Potions Master."

[igorofmalaria]

((Edited.))

Now that he had a clear view, they did look different. This man was wearing the wrong shade of lipstick for one.
"Oh. You look like someone I know. My apologies, Lord Potions Master Wolfe. I noticed the sign-" Igor pointed to the door "said you had open hours."

He glanced over at the desk were those muffins? I should have eaten lunch.
"I'm interested in learning potions, because I have a project of my own." The flask of solution was produced.
(opefully Wolfe wouldn't think he was being presumptious. Though almost nobody seemed to have that reaction to him at Hogwarts.)
"Where I come from there isn't magic, only chemistry so I don't know how to recreate this."
Muffins.

[degeneratewolfe]

Valentine was so rarely mistaken for anyone else that he didn't know if he should feel irritated or flattered. He decided to go with option number three: ignoring that bit of information and moving on to the other questions and conversation points.

"Lord Wolfe is fine, thank you," he told the... student. "I am indeed holding office hours. You see, it's been so long since I've been here and I fear that some students may have forgotten about me. And I can't have that."

His smile, which had flickered dangerous and predatory for a moment, returned to something more benign. Sort of. "Besides, I'm planning a class soon! One of the advantages of wandering this world--" Limited and isolated as it is-- "is that I encounter all sorts of other concoctions that one would never find in an ordinary, Ministry of Magic-approved textbook. I feel that it is my responsibility to pass some of that knowledge onto eager young minds such as yours. May I see your sample? And," he said, holding out one long white hand, "would you care for a muffin

[igorofmalaria]

Igor hesitantly handed over the sample- it was corked and had bits of scone floating in it.
He selected an enticing-smelling muffin with odd pink bits and took a bite.

"It's different," he said after swallowing. "It seems to have a different effect on everyone that's tried it- some of them useful transformations." His experience, for example.

"I'm excited about your class." He took another bite. "Very excited! Oh! And spores: the gazebo plague must have been spread by spores!" He blinked, wondering why he was talking about it, but who cared? He felt so good. And energetic!
"Don't drop it please, that sample's very precious to me, ah ha! ha!"

[degeneratewolfe]

Ah, excellent. The little fellow would thank Valentine later for that one, he was sure. In the meantime, he examined the sample, uncorking it and sniffing, nostrils flaring delicately as his overly-worked brain tried to analyze it by scent alone. There were a few notes that he could recognize, and he filed them away for later use, but some... "Do you mind if I take a sample of your sample? Not much, just drop or two. And you'll get the rest back, safe and sound."

[igorofmalaria]

Igor stared. Lord Valentine's lips were moving, but the sound didn't exactly sync. "What? Oh, yes, yes ok. It's all mixed together, stuff." He wanted to rush off and do important things, but he had a suspicion.

"What is these-in these...? He'd never experimented with recreational drugs before (bad for the brain), but his class of people had miserable working conditions and access to chemistry labs- so he *knew* about them.

[degeneratewolfe]

"Excellent." He rummaged around on his desk and pulled an empty vial and a glass pipette and bulb from one drawer. Expertly, a few milliliters were withdrawn from Igor's vial and placed in Valentine's. "Wonderful. I will of course let you know once I have results." He held Igor's vial out.

"Oh, this and that. Blueberry, raspberry, banana nut... valium, MDMA, dextroamphetamine, a few charms and hexes of my own discovery." He smiled proudly. "I'm not the Potions Master for nothing, you know."

[igorofmalaria]

"Bluh?" He was NOT HAPPY about being experimented on, but then again- "an experiment?" he managed to say. "Maybeanimportantoneofdubiouslegality, kindoflikewhentherecyclersarealloutofpartsandyouhavetogograve-borrowing,huh?" In that case, it almost made it ok. Almost. "Gottobeoff-wouldn'twanttowearoutyourwelcome.Thingstogo."
He took his vial and headed to the door, careful to avoid the mushrooms.
((Maybe Valentine had included an extra ingredient that he'd forgotten?))

[degeneratewolfe]

"Not at all. They've already been tested." On house elves. And himself, of course. He waved airily at the retreating figure. "Ta, then!"

((Oh, that's not nearly the whole list. Go with whatever and assume it's there!))