Application for Gert! ( I can't stop xO)
1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?
I'm not very fond of cheese in general, it goes too well with whine.
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?
Barney already has a hit taken out on him (watch out for Molly, my purple friend dino). Though, I think I'd rather kill Carrot-top anyhow (I've never much liked redheads). And Old Lace would get a kick out of eating him. She may not actually be a raptor. . . but I was a little behind on my paleontology when I first got her.
3. What time is it where you are?
Almost 9:30, which means that Victor should be napping, and it's about time for me to go stick some more paper clips into his face.
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.
Ew. Well, if it came down to it, Snape. Nothing more appealing than a brilliant mind. Except maybe a dumb blonde.
5. If you are pushing to be in:
A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.
Pick your Poison. Why not? I'll replace almond liquers with cyanide and be sure to set the place up with a roulette wheel.
B. Gryffindor - Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
Marriage is overrated. He should marry one, divorce him, and marry the other. They can all live together, with any other lovers they wish to take, and call it a co-op. They'll be like hippies. Just so long as they don't live next to me, all is well that ends well.
C. Ravenclaw - You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.
Clearly, the problem lies in how you're disposing of your paperwork. Simply completing your work as necessary encourages the powers that be to provide you with more, as it displays that you are willing to do said work. I'm quite certain that if you shred it before giving it a second glance, it will eventually stop being sent to you, and will instead find its way to a more comfortable home.
D. Hufflepuff - Prove you are not useless.
My empathic and telepathic bond with a Dienonychus is more than a little helpful; she's a very sweet animal, really. Carniverous, yes, but also sweet. I have a gaydar to be reckoned with (right, Karolina?), and impeccable taste in film and literature. If I may say so, myself.
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe.
Making friends with Old Lace, of course, is a requisite for all of you. She's very friendly (and she won't bite unless you smell like hamburgers). I seem (against all odds) to have a way with kids, so if you need someone baby-sat, I suppose I could do that. And dump the job on Chase, later. I speak Hebrew and Yiddish, if you need lessons or translations. And, of course, there's all those random gadgets Chase took from his parents' lab. There should be a few of those lying around. He'll never notice they're missing. Or, if you're need a girlfriend, I know an desperate rebounding emo-goth Asian girl (Nico) who wants a boyfriend like a New Yorker wants a fixed-rate apartment.