Application: Leo (Fullmetal Alchemist)
Leo sat in the Sorting Room, staring at the application before him. He was completely mystified by it; from the discussions he'd been overhearing snippets of, it was for some kind of magic school. Now, the only sort of magic he knew anything about was alchemy, and even then his knowledge was limited, but he knew it was nothing he wanted anything to do with.
Sighing and rubbing the back of his neck, he tapped the quill against the parchment. Maybe if he just answered the questions honestly the application would be rejected, he figured. Then he could go... home. If that camp in Kishua could really be considered "home".
He raised the quill to begin filling out the answers.
1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?
"Don't like cheese," he muttered, then jumped with a start when the quill moved on its own to jot that down. "What the-- how did it..." So far as he knew, even alchemy couldn't make something like that happen -- not that studying alchemy was a hobby of Leo's.
He moved on to the next question, to see if it would happen again.
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?
"I don't know who they are," he said cautiously, eyeing the quill as it copied down his words. "Carrottop's a really stupid name, but they don't deserve to be killed unless they've done something wrong. Are they murderers or exiles or something like that?"
Before moving on, he took the quill and underlined the word "stupid" twice. Because it really was.
3. What time is it where you are?
"Uh..." He glanced around for a clock. "Two o'clock, and it's sunny out."
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them?
Okay, what. Leo frowned down at the paper. "I'm not answering this." He glared at the quill, as though daring it to write something down, but it didn't move.
"Who's Albus Dumbledore, anyway?" he muttered. And it copied that down.
5. If you are pushing to be in:
A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.
Leo blinked. "I, uh, don't. Is this a trick question?"
B. Gryffindor - Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
Homophobe alert - "Gross," he spat out. "Harry better be a nickname for Harriet or something, because otherwise, that's disgusting. He shouldn't marry either of them." He skipped using examples from any sort of mythology, because the only one he knew of that applied he didn't consider to be mythology.
C. Ravenclaw - You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I'm constantly disposing of it.
"You're not disposing of it fast enough?" Leo suggested. "Try getting someone else to help."
D. Hufflepuff - Prove you are not useless.
"That's just dumb. Y'can't prove a negative."
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe. Do not threaten us rather than offering a bribe. A threat indicates you either don't really want to be here, or don't have enough sense to answer the question properly. The hat will automatically squib you, regardless of other votes, if you do.
Leo grinned. Turning out his pockets, he stated, "I don't have anything. No money, no nothing. Guess you'll have to turn me away, then, huh?" Then he realized, "Well, I am good at sewing." He muttered it quietly, mainly to himself, but to his annoyance, the quill took it down anyway. Damn it.
I have read the hogwarts_hocus faq, and understand it is a crazy, cracktastic sorting community and RPG. _Leo_
I have read the hogwarts_hocus rules and agree to abide by each and every one of them. _Leo_
I agree to be a good sport and not get my knickers in a bunch. _Leo_
One day, marmalade will rule the world. _Leo_ ...wait, what?
((And there go my slots for FMA characters. Posted with the approval of the other FMA-muns.))
Sighing and rubbing the back of his neck, he tapped the quill against the parchment. Maybe if he just answered the questions honestly the application would be rejected, he figured. Then he could go... home. If that camp in Kishua could really be considered "home".
He raised the quill to begin filling out the answers.
1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?
"Don't like cheese," he muttered, then jumped with a start when the quill moved on its own to jot that down. "What the-- how did it..." So far as he knew, even alchemy couldn't make something like that happen -- not that studying alchemy was a hobby of Leo's.
He moved on to the next question, to see if it would happen again.
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?
"I don't know who they are," he said cautiously, eyeing the quill as it copied down his words. "Carrottop's a really stupid name, but they don't deserve to be killed unless they've done something wrong. Are they murderers or exiles or something like that?"
Before moving on, he took the quill and underlined the word "stupid" twice. Because it really was.
3. What time is it where you are?
"Uh..." He glanced around for a clock. "Two o'clock, and it's sunny out."
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them?
Okay, what. Leo frowned down at the paper. "I'm not answering this." He glared at the quill, as though daring it to write something down, but it didn't move.
"Who's Albus Dumbledore, anyway?" he muttered. And it copied that down.
5. If you are pushing to be in:
A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.
Leo blinked. "I, uh, don't. Is this a trick question?"
B. Gryffindor - Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
Homophobe alert - "Gross," he spat out. "Harry better be a nickname for Harriet or something, because otherwise, that's disgusting. He shouldn't marry either of them." He skipped using examples from any sort of mythology, because the only one he knew of that applied he didn't consider to be mythology.
C. Ravenclaw - You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I'm constantly disposing of it.
"You're not disposing of it fast enough?" Leo suggested. "Try getting someone else to help."
D. Hufflepuff - Prove you are not useless.
"That's just dumb. Y'can't prove a negative."
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe. Do not threaten us rather than offering a bribe. A threat indicates you either don't really want to be here, or don't have enough sense to answer the question properly. The hat will automatically squib you, regardless of other votes, if you do.
Leo grinned. Turning out his pockets, he stated, "I don't have anything. No money, no nothing. Guess you'll have to turn me away, then, huh?" Then he realized, "Well, I am good at sewing." He muttered it quietly, mainly to himself, but to his annoyance, the quill took it down anyway. Damn it.
I have read the hogwarts_hocus faq, and understand it is a crazy, cracktastic sorting community and RPG. _Leo_
I have read the hogwarts_hocus rules and agree to abide by each and every one of them. _Leo_
I agree to be a good sport and not get my knickers in a bunch. _Leo_
One day, marmalade will rule the world. _Leo_ ...wait, what?
((And there go my slots for FMA characters. Posted with the approval of the other FMA-muns.))