Application: Ruby, "Fullmetal Alchemist: The Valley of White Petals"
Ruby frowned as she looked over the application she held. Magic school? What in the...
It couldn't hurt to answer the questions. When in Creta, do as the Cretans do, or so the saying went. She sighed and proceeded to answer.
1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?
"I'm not a big fan of cheese," she replied, "but I do like blue cheeses, mainly because they look funny. Honestly, they all taste the same to me."
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?
Ruby frowned. "Well, considering I don't know who either of them are, you'd have to give me a damn good reason to kill either of them.
"Now, is this a magic school, a culinary school, or an assassin school? What do these questions have to do with anything?"
3. What time is it where you are?
She blinked and considered skipping this question; it seemed useless. "I don't have a watch on me, but it's about one in the afternoon, isn't it? What does it mean 'where I am', anyway?"
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them?
Ruby scratched her head in confusion. "As for how I'd do it, well, if I was returned from the dead I guess I'd be stumbling around trying to eat their brains or something. I don't know who I'd pick, though, 'cause I don't know what this Order of the Phoenix thing is." Under her breath, she muttered, "But unless any of them are Alphonse Elric..."
5. If you are pushing to be in:
A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.
"It's so dark that any mortals who heard its name would die from utter shock."
B. Gryffindor - Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
Sigh; more namedropping of people she'd never heard of. "How about these Fred and George guys just get married to each other? Then Harry wouldn't have to worry about it. Never studied any mythology, but I'm pretty sure the Tortoise and the Hare backs my point up pretty well." She rolled her eyes.
C. Ravenclaw - You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I'm constantly disposing of it.
"Because whoever's been assigning it has noticed you haven't been doing it, of course. Don't be so lazy and maybe you'll actually get somewhere. Maybe if you spent more time on your paperwork and less time on stuff like this so-called application..."
D. Hufflepuff - Prove you are not useless.
Ruby tapped her chin in thought. "Well, I was one of that creep Raygen's security detail back in Wisteria. It took a lot of skill to keep those bandits out of the village." Then she smiled. "Also, I can cook."
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe. Do not threaten us rather than offering a bribe. A threat indicates you either don't really want to be here, or don't have enough sense to answer the question properly. The hat will automatically squib you, regardless of other votes, if you do.
She grinned broadly. "Equivalent exchange, huh? Well, let's see-- I don't have anything physical to offer, but if any of you need a bodyguard, I'd be glad to offer my services." Absently, she flexed one of her arms. "I'm pretty strong, if I do say so myself."
I have read the hogwarts_hocus faq, and understand it is a crazy, cracktastic sorting community and RPG. ~*Ruby*~
I have read the hogwarts_hocus rules and agree to abide by each and every one of them. ~~**Ruby**~~
I agree to be a good sport and not get my knickers in a bunch. ~*~Ruby~*~
One day, marmalade will rule the world. ~*~*~Ruby~*~*~
It couldn't hurt to answer the questions. When in Creta, do as the Cretans do, or so the saying went. She sighed and proceeded to answer.
1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?
"I'm not a big fan of cheese," she replied, "but I do like blue cheeses, mainly because they look funny. Honestly, they all taste the same to me."
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?
Ruby frowned. "Well, considering I don't know who either of them are, you'd have to give me a damn good reason to kill either of them.
"Now, is this a magic school, a culinary school, or an assassin school? What do these questions have to do with anything?"
3. What time is it where you are?
She blinked and considered skipping this question; it seemed useless. "I don't have a watch on me, but it's about one in the afternoon, isn't it? What does it mean 'where I am', anyway?"
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them?
Ruby scratched her head in confusion. "As for how I'd do it, well, if I was returned from the dead I guess I'd be stumbling around trying to eat their brains or something. I don't know who I'd pick, though, 'cause I don't know what this Order of the Phoenix thing is." Under her breath, she muttered, "But unless any of them are Alphonse Elric..."
5. If you are pushing to be in:
A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.
"It's so dark that any mortals who heard its name would die from utter shock."
B. Gryffindor - Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
Sigh; more namedropping of people she'd never heard of. "How about these Fred and George guys just get married to each other? Then Harry wouldn't have to worry about it. Never studied any mythology, but I'm pretty sure the Tortoise and the Hare backs my point up pretty well." She rolled her eyes.
C. Ravenclaw - You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I'm constantly disposing of it.
"Because whoever's been assigning it has noticed you haven't been doing it, of course. Don't be so lazy and maybe you'll actually get somewhere. Maybe if you spent more time on your paperwork and less time on stuff like this so-called application..."
D. Hufflepuff - Prove you are not useless.
Ruby tapped her chin in thought. "Well, I was one of that creep Raygen's security detail back in Wisteria. It took a lot of skill to keep those bandits out of the village." Then she smiled. "Also, I can cook."
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe. Do not threaten us rather than offering a bribe. A threat indicates you either don't really want to be here, or don't have enough sense to answer the question properly. The hat will automatically squib you, regardless of other votes, if you do.
She grinned broadly. "Equivalent exchange, huh? Well, let's see-- I don't have anything physical to offer, but if any of you need a bodyguard, I'd be glad to offer my services." Absently, she flexed one of her arms. "I'm pretty strong, if I do say so myself."
I have read the hogwarts_hocus faq, and understand it is a crazy, cracktastic sorting community and RPG. ~*Ruby*~
I have read the hogwarts_hocus rules and agree to abide by each and every one of them. ~~**Ruby**~~
I agree to be a good sport and not get my knickers in a bunch. ~*~Ruby~*~
One day, marmalade will rule the world. ~*~*~Ruby~*~*~