Application: Liz, Shaun of the Dead

[dont_exacerbate]

It was a good thing Liz had been warned about Hogwarts--specifically, about how damned weird it could be. Unlike many applicants, she didn’t just show up in the Sorting Room; instead, she and Shaun had taken the Floo system through Diagon Alley, a trip that made the Tube look like a paragon of efficiency by comparison. At least the Tube didn’t get

Comments

[dont_exacerbate]

No, though neither one of them knew it, Charles wasn't likely to remain at loose ends for very long.

Liz hesitated. She knew Susan was a very, very private person, and didn't know how much she ought to share. The fact that Camilla knew Susan had been a mess didn't necessarily imply that Susan would willingly share such information; anyone with use of their eyes could have told that she had been a complete mess.

"She had to, really," she said at last. "Her grandfather apparently turned into a piece of popcorn, and she turned into Death. I'll tell you, the first morning I woke up and found her as she was came as more of a shock even than Z-Day." She paused again. "Though between you, me, and Shaun, I'm not sure that's the only reason. She didn't really fit in well outside--well, obviously she wouldn't--and I don't think she could stay away. She turned into...whatever she was...and then she turned back, and Shaun has no idea why, and I can't make a guess, either. And something happened to all kinds of people on Halloween, that neither one of them will say much about, other than that somehow all that silly buggery is okay now."

Well. That was...definitely more than she'd planned on saying. Liz wondered what it was about Camilla, that had inspired such unusual garrulity; normally she was a bit more reserved, especially when it came to discussing other people.

[c_macaulay]

Camilla knew how Susan had 'turned back', and what had happened on Halloween, at least part of it. She just wasn't saying.

"Nothing happened to us on Halloween," Camilla said truthfully. "But something did happen, I'm told. That's part of why I'm surprised to see you here, honestly. This isn't exactly the safest place to be. I like it all right -- we plan on staying for some time, for the foreseeable future at least. But I do worry about it, for all kinds of reasons. Those funny little episodes of mass hysteria that tend to sweep the school. It's not good for a relationship." This was a major concern of Camilla's, nowadays. She twisted the wedding band on her finger (plain and severe in the sort of way that only very expensive things are, platinum and cold diamond).

"I don't know how much you know about how she got to be such a mess in the first place, but I would have expected Susan to go home, after everything. I'd think she would have fit in better there than here."

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Liz laughed, half humorlessly. "I've heard stories," she said. "But Shaun wants to stay here, and I've heard enough that I wanted to see it, too. Besides," she added, "if Shaun and I can withstand a massive zombie invasion, I think our relationship could handle just about anything."

She sobered. "Shaun told me what he knew, and Susan inadvertently told me much more than she likely wanted to. I never once heard her say anything about going back to the world she came from, though--from what I could gather, this place is home to her, somehow. From what little she said, I think she's as much of an oddity there as she is here, if not moreso."

[c_macaulay]

Camilla had to laugh a little. "You'll have to meet our nice zombies. Sort of nice, anyway. They don't eat people. As far as I know they don't really eat anything at all. At least you know what you're getting into, anyway -- coming to Hogwarts, I mean. Most people don't expect all this. When things happen, it can be bad."

Shaun seemed ... resilient. It occurred to Camilla that perhaps Liz's and Shaun's relationship might not be such a delicate balancing act as the ones Camilla was used to. Maybe they really could weather anything Hogwarts threw at them. Anyway it was, as she'd said, an informed risk.

"For unusual people I guess the place can be a haven. We used to say about our old college -- the college Henry and my brother and I all used to attend -- that it was 'the last place on earth for the worst people in the world'. Hogwarts is like that, except replace 'worst' with 'strangest'. Maybe that says something about us, since we've chosen to stay here a while." A little self-deprecating laugh, a little smile that was charming in its wry self-consciousness.

And she was strange, wasn't she? Like something not quite belonging to this world, yet unmistakably human. It was something in the way Camilla carried herself, the distance between her and everything else, as though she were protected by some forcefield, some charmed circle; and when she smiled a certain way, tilted her head, lowered her voice, it drew you into the circle where she was.

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"I've heard about a few of the random chocolate incidents," Liz said, with a dry smile. "And several of the holiday disasters. It doesn't seem to do any lasting harm, though, that either Shaun or Susan has told me about." That didn't mean it never happened, but at least it wasn't a regular, well-documented occurrence.

She found herself wondering what sort of university Camilla would have attended, and wondering just what this Henry was like. "What brought you here, if you don't mind my asking? Shaun came because he wanted to help Ed, and I came because of Shaun, and Susan doesn't remember why or how she wound up here." She somehow didn't think Camilla's arrival had been random chance, like that of a few people Shaun had told her about.

[c_macaulay]

"Maybe it didn't do lasting harm to Shaun or Susan, then." For Camilla's part, both her experiences with enchanted chocolate (or chocolate-containing items) had resulted in unpleasant emotional fallout. She'd had a huge fight with Henry the last time. She counted that as lasting harm.

"Me? I came here because I wanted to learn magic." Innocent and open; and why not? She really had come to Hogwarts because she wanted to learn magic. "Not stage magic."

[dont_exacerbate]

If it had done any emotional harm to Shaun, Liz almost definitely would have been able to tell, at least a little. Susan was another matter entirely, but Susan was a strange one anyway.

"How on earth does it all work" she asked, unable to help herself. "Both Shaun and Susan have said it's best not to ask that question, but...well, you have to wonder, don't you? I mean, Shaun and I came here from our London, yet apparently out there is a London that's never heard of Z-Day. It's like all the laws of time and space and physics just...don't apply." Liz, rational creature that she was, really wanted to be able to quantify Hogwarts, even though she knew it was a battle she would never win.

[c_macaulay]

Camilla blinked.

"I don't know. I really don't. Probably magic, like everything else."

[dont_exacerbate]

Liz paused a moment, then laughed. "I really did set myself up for that one, didn't I? I can't help it, though. I can accept that magic is real, but part of me still wants to figure out what makes it tick. You've no idea how much time I spent trying to explain to myself how Susan could walk through walls."

[c_macaulay]

"We all want to know how it works," said Camilla, who really meant Henry and I want to know how it works. "What we know for sure is that it does work, and just now it seems more important to learn how to use it than to worry why that's possible." She gave a little shrug, as if to say Why give yourself a headache? "Maybe you ought to be in Ravenclaw, if you're more interested in theory than in applied magic?"

[dont_exacerbate]

"You know, that's what Susan said, too," Liz mused. "Shaun's in Hufflepuff, but from what I understand people house-hop all the time, so I don't suppose anyone would mind if I moved in with him, or he moved in with me." That was what really mattered; wherever they were supposed to be was more or less immaterial. "And I suspect I'll give up on the theory and stick to the practical eventually, but until then I'll quite willingly frustrate myself."

vote: Ravenclaw

[c_macaulay]

"Ravenclaw then," Camilla decided. "We're over in Gryffindor, if you need anything."