MSOE....
So here begin my days at MSOE... I started going to college to be a Bio-Med Engineer. I say to everyone I want to study with prostethics and such and deal with Myo Electrical control but really i dont think thats my calling. Like I know i can do it and such just not sure my heart is set on that. Also I feel like most of my energy is going towards this one girl... Which of course is never a good thing and seems to fill this journal constantly. I gusse this can be considered my broken heart journal. Or my journal of love. Ha Ha I will be saddened the day I lose this, Maybe I should back this up... That would be a good Idea. Well so what to talk about... Since the summer I met another girl at the end. She was quite nice and enjoyable. I seemed relaxed around her and very confident... She seemed to like me and I trusted her... Hmmm Perhapse thats my issue. Well Things went well and she seemed very reluctant to want to have sex with me... She finally let me and it was very fun for quite some time. Till I had to leave I did what I always do and spoke to her for about 1-2 weeks, then broke communication... I hate it when I have to see them still it sucks. Ok so after that I flew to the great state of WI landed here and started school. Much I left out but W/E. School started off well and I begang skateing with the team and going out and having a good time. Things started well then after that i gusse life set in and people stoped having the pretty smiles and such they always do. I think about 2 weeks in I slept with a girl I met at a party. From what she told me I was the first guy she had slept with... Im not sure if i should beileve it but from what I heard around the area it's high possible. If so i should really talk to the girl more. I feel bad about the thing, cause I know how it is for girls and even guys when that stuff happen's. So after that it seemed all good and life went on. I kept skating and being my-self... Till finally I met this girl (and so it begins ha ha)... She said hi to me one day as she was working at the front desk of the Kern center of the ice rink on campus after a captains practice. She said hey do you remeber me? and i replied nicely not trying to be rude but very vaigly have any memory of her. She then stated that the first thing I had ever stated to her was "Do you cheat on your boyfriend?" Not remebering this I was a little shocked at my own comment but she seemed intreagued. Well couple weeks of cute flirting and inoccent winks, turned into somthing else when I came and sat down with her one day at the kern... We talked for many hours... So I invited her to my room. Well she has a boyfriend... She came, to cuddle... Yet she ended up sleeping with me. Im not sure igsactly how to take this honestly... Whether this is a lack of character on her part or perhapse she was truley like messmerized by me and thats why she did it. thigns were good and she came over the next night and the same occurd. We continued to sleep with eachother for many nights. and yet till this day it has been perhpase only a spot of nights that has not ended in our laying next to eachother. This dosnt mean we are always having sex but simply we are in the same bed at night. She stated that she wanted to break things off with her boyfriend and I stated that she should do that simply beacuse she doesnt want to be with him not beacuse of me. She came on pretty strong to this whole thing and made me have pretty strong feelings back towards her. finally she broke it off and we were left as single together. She had dated this guy for 3 years. Im not stupid and I understand how feelings are evolved and how they make a person do dumb and crazy things. I started to devolope seriouse feelings for her but it seemed that she got unintrested in me. Soon I started to do poorly in hockey and finally got cut... Simply not because I wasnt good enough but beacuse I had come down with the flue right during try-outs and had to stop... Which was simply a stroke of bad luck. Intresting how I talk about the girl in this and not me loseing somthing that has been apart of my life for 10 or more years. Perhapse that is a view into my character. Intresting. Well Im not sure how to go abotu this but She was staying in another guys room for hours on end till very late at night, WTF im an idiot....