[key/jonghyun] i’d catch a grenade for ya
i’d catch a grenade for ya
key-centric, one-sided!key/jonghyun
pg, ~1,500w
Kibum has the biggest crush on this senior who looks like Jack Frost and nobody knows who Jack Frost is, except for The Jack Frost himself. (attempted crack /cries)
“Minho,” Kibum says, a spoonful of caramel pudding in the air before his lips as he pauses to speak, “Minho, that guy looks like Jack fucking Frost.”
Said guy dumps the remnants on his cafeteria tray into the trash bin by roughly shaking the tray with one hand and carefully slides the tray onto the counter beside. He leans down to smooth his jeans after, and when he leans back up he flips his hair to the side.
Ah, luscious silver hair. The root of all of Kibum’s heartaches.
“Jack fucking frost? Who’s that?” Minho replies, looking up from his phone with half of his granola bar wedged between his lips and mild interest in his eyes.
“Soccer player. Snapbacks. Dr. Dre beats. High-cut kicks. Choi Minho is a jock. Why did I just ask a jock about Jack Frost,” Kibum whines as he swallows a spoonful of pudding with much effort, “dude, why are we even friends again.”
“Because my mom gave you a pair of my pants when you shit yours in grade 1,” Minho says easily (they’ve been through this many times - when Kibum had asked this question for the first time, Minho had felt wounded, but now he knows how to deal with this), small chunks of nuts escaping his lips ungraciously as he talks. Kibum watches them land on the table with wary eyes. “And your mom decided it was fate. I still remember the way she said it, she literally had sparkling eyes-”
“-no one talks about grade 1 anymore, Minho, that’s against the rules of any social situation,” Kibum whines into his jacket sleeve as he buries his head into the crook of his elbow, and his voice comes out muffled by the thick cotton.
The embodiment of Jack Frost walks past their table without so much a glance at them.
“Grade 1 was awesome though,” Minho continues happily, unaware of Kibum’s current (sad) predicament, “because your mom made me extra kimbab just because you don’t eat vegetables and you were convinced seaweed definitely tasted like radish-”
“-shut up,” Kibum manages to bite back sadly, watching the silver-haired guy strut out of the cafeteria.
-
The next time Kibum sees Jack Frost (he had named him Jack Frost just out of convenience) is during their school’s annual clubs bazaar. Minho is playing on the field in one hour intervals for their soccer team because, well, he’s a good player, he’s popular, and he gets crowds. Kibum is bored out of his wits sitting at the bleachers and watching the ball fly from one end of the field to the other, but his companion, Taemin, from his high school dance class, is thoroughly enjoying himself from Kibum’s side.
“Minho!” Taemin yells when Minho headbutts and scores in a goal, and Kibum winces at the volume.
“Taemin-ah,” Kibum whispers, and when Taemin doesn’t seem to have heard it, he asks louder. “Do you really enjoy soccer,” he says, but a guy from the other team scores a goal and Taemin is far too gone immersing himself in jeers to care about Kibum.
It’s then that Kibum sighs and looks around, and sees Jack Frost carrying a huge poster, waddling around the entrance to the stadium. Kibum may be a little myopic (his doctor told him that when he was fifteen, god bless), but the word in red on the poster definitely says ‘choir’.
Jack Frost can sing.
When the matches end, Kibum grabs Taemin by his shoulders and looks at him in the eyes with a stony glare. “Taemin. I think you should go audition for the school choir.”
“What-”
“I heard you screaming just now, during the games, Taemin, your voice was amazing. And I know a good voice when I hear one.”
Kibum doesn’t really derive joy from waiting, but he stands outside the choir room all the time Taemin’s in there, and each time the doors creak open he can see Jack Frost on a chair with earbuds popped in his ears and a thick stack of scores on his lap.
Kibum drowns in the saddening discovery that Jack Frost uses a pair of purple-colored Dr. Dre earphones as the doors swing shut.
“Hyung!” Taemin exclaims as he bounds out of the room later, “I got in!”
Kibum only stares on with his jaw opened, astounded at the mess he’s created.
-
“Are you doing contemporary or street this year, by the way,” Kibum asks one time when they’re studying in the school library after classes, and Taemin looks up from his calculus textbook quizzically.
“Hyung, I’m in soprano,” Taemin replies gently.
“Oh right,” Kibum slaps himself mentally. Lee Taemin has hopped from dance to choir, and everything is because of him. He stares at his hands angrily before recalling something.
It’s been two choir practices since Taemin first joined. He’s definitely seen Jack Frost, right? “Did you see anyone with silver hair in choir, Taemin?”
“Silver hair? Why would you be looking for-”
“No,” Kibum interjects swiftly, both hands already up in defence. “I was thinking if silver would look nice on real people because I might dye my hair soon.”
“Oh,” Taemin says. “No. But there’s this girl from my year who asked me for my number because she thought I sang well and she wanted me to teach her after classes.” Taemin smiles and Kibum’s jaw drops in horror.
“Taemin,” Kibum half-shouts, knuckles turning white from the amount of force he’s exerting on his poor pencil. “You are so stupid. She wants your d,” he exclaims, arms flailing around to show his point.
By the time Kibum realizes their situation and that they really shouldn’t be doing this in a library, it’s too late. They have about the whole library’s capacity’s worth of eyes staring at them and the librarian strolls over with fire in her eyes.
The both of them get banned from entering the library for the entire semester and are now blacklisted by the librarians.
-
“Dude,” Minho says and raises a brow skeptically when Kibum sets his lunch tray down, “purple Dr. Dre beats.”
“Don’t judge me,” Kibum replies defensively, chucking the earphones into his backpack with a frown, “I have my reasons,” he looks up at Minho and says with a pained expression.
“Welcome to college,” Minho exclaims while stuffing the last bite (it is a huge bite, in Kibum’s defense) of his tuna sandwich into his mouth. Kibum bites back the urge to cry.
-
Kibum gets Jinki, a senior he knows from high school, also the vice president of the student body to plead with the head librarian until she finally concedes and removes the ban from Kibum and Taemin’s heads. The semester isn’t quite yet over, but the semester tests are over, so. He doesn’t really know what unethical methods Jinki resorted to in convincing her, but Jinki is an ethical man, bless him, so Kibum doesn’t really want to know either.
It’s a late night in April when Kibum sneaks out of the doom with a hot bowl of instant ramyun in his hands and sneaks into the empty library through the unlocked doors. It must be lady luck shining down on him because the librarian, whoever it was, forgot to lock the doors properly, and it just had to happen in the week where Kibum forgot to bring his laptop back to school from home after the weekend spent at home.
He’s halfway through yet another rerun of Rise of the Guardians on a shitty movie streaming website on one of the computers in the library and half the bowl of ramyun is already gone before he hears the door swinging open. He’s halfway done with trying to hide his bowl of ramyun under his hoodie but the lights flicker on and the bowl is warm on his crotch.
Kibum’s crotch is burning when he realizes the unlucky librarian who forgot to lock up the doors is Jack Frost. He can’t find the energy to move his hands.
“Rise of the Guardians? With kimchi ramyun?” He asks, and Kibum basks in the pleasant that is his voice, managing a nod.
“Damn, I can’t give this a miss, can I? C'mon, scoot over. Where is the film at right now?”
By the end of the film, Kibum learns that Jack Frost is actually called Kim Jonghyun, he’s a year older than Kibum is and his hair was really inspired by Jack Frost. He can sing, he’s both soprano and alto and bass and everything nice and he knows both Taemin and Jinki. Kibum also thinks he’s pretty much perfect when Jonghyun calls him a “new friend” with this huge grin on his face.
-
“Jinki,” Kibum says sadly over his bento set, chopsticks jabbing hard at soft, steamed rice. “Jinki, I think I am in love with Jack Frost.”
“What’s a Jack Frost?” Jinki replies, and Jonghyun walks past their table with a cordial wave and a smile (a smile! Kibum receives a smile!) at both Jinki and Kibum.
“Never mind,” Kibum says, and sighs in bliss as he watches Jonghyun strut out of the cafeteria.
-
a/n: this did not just happen.
real a/n: i wrote this from 12am to 1am. after 2.5 years of absence in the shinee ficdom, i return (just this once) to present you with sheer attempted crack. guys. i tried.
inspired by jonghyun's hair and my muse for cooking up a plot on How Dense Minho Would Be In School while i was in the shower. cries i still remember when i was such a greenhorn writing shinee as sohye-x3ctmh, but i am so over that phase. this had been a refreshing break from my constant exo turmoil and i missed writing key, so there. ♥
key-centric, one-sided!key/jonghyun
pg, ~1,500w
Kibum has the biggest crush on this senior who looks like Jack Frost and nobody knows who Jack Frost is, except for The Jack Frost himself. (attempted crack /cries)
“Minho,” Kibum says, a spoonful of caramel pudding in the air before his lips as he pauses to speak, “Minho, that guy looks like Jack fucking Frost.”
Said guy dumps the remnants on his cafeteria tray into the trash bin by roughly shaking the tray with one hand and carefully slides the tray onto the counter beside. He leans down to smooth his jeans after, and when he leans back up he flips his hair to the side.
Ah, luscious silver hair. The root of all of Kibum’s heartaches.
“Jack fucking frost? Who’s that?” Minho replies, looking up from his phone with half of his granola bar wedged between his lips and mild interest in his eyes.
“Soccer player. Snapbacks. Dr. Dre beats. High-cut kicks. Choi Minho is a jock. Why did I just ask a jock about Jack Frost,” Kibum whines as he swallows a spoonful of pudding with much effort, “dude, why are we even friends again.”
“Because my mom gave you a pair of my pants when you shit yours in grade 1,” Minho says easily (they’ve been through this many times - when Kibum had asked this question for the first time, Minho had felt wounded, but now he knows how to deal with this), small chunks of nuts escaping his lips ungraciously as he talks. Kibum watches them land on the table with wary eyes. “And your mom decided it was fate. I still remember the way she said it, she literally had sparkling eyes-”
“-no one talks about grade 1 anymore, Minho, that’s against the rules of any social situation,” Kibum whines into his jacket sleeve as he buries his head into the crook of his elbow, and his voice comes out muffled by the thick cotton.
The embodiment of Jack Frost walks past their table without so much a glance at them.
“Grade 1 was awesome though,” Minho continues happily, unaware of Kibum’s current (sad) predicament, “because your mom made me extra kimbab just because you don’t eat vegetables and you were convinced seaweed definitely tasted like radish-”
“-shut up,” Kibum manages to bite back sadly, watching the silver-haired guy strut out of the cafeteria.
-
The next time Kibum sees Jack Frost (he had named him Jack Frost just out of convenience) is during their school’s annual clubs bazaar. Minho is playing on the field in one hour intervals for their soccer team because, well, he’s a good player, he’s popular, and he gets crowds. Kibum is bored out of his wits sitting at the bleachers and watching the ball fly from one end of the field to the other, but his companion, Taemin, from his high school dance class, is thoroughly enjoying himself from Kibum’s side.
“Minho!” Taemin yells when Minho headbutts and scores in a goal, and Kibum winces at the volume.
“Taemin-ah,” Kibum whispers, and when Taemin doesn’t seem to have heard it, he asks louder. “Do you really enjoy soccer,” he says, but a guy from the other team scores a goal and Taemin is far too gone immersing himself in jeers to care about Kibum.
It’s then that Kibum sighs and looks around, and sees Jack Frost carrying a huge poster, waddling around the entrance to the stadium. Kibum may be a little myopic (his doctor told him that when he was fifteen, god bless), but the word in red on the poster definitely says ‘choir’.
Jack Frost can sing.
When the matches end, Kibum grabs Taemin by his shoulders and looks at him in the eyes with a stony glare. “Taemin. I think you should go audition for the school choir.”
“What-”
“I heard you screaming just now, during the games, Taemin, your voice was amazing. And I know a good voice when I hear one.”
Kibum doesn’t really derive joy from waiting, but he stands outside the choir room all the time Taemin’s in there, and each time the doors creak open he can see Jack Frost on a chair with earbuds popped in his ears and a thick stack of scores on his lap.
Kibum drowns in the saddening discovery that Jack Frost uses a pair of purple-colored Dr. Dre earphones as the doors swing shut.
“Hyung!” Taemin exclaims as he bounds out of the room later, “I got in!”
Kibum only stares on with his jaw opened, astounded at the mess he’s created.
-
“Are you doing contemporary or street this year, by the way,” Kibum asks one time when they’re studying in the school library after classes, and Taemin looks up from his calculus textbook quizzically.
“Hyung, I’m in soprano,” Taemin replies gently.
“Oh right,” Kibum slaps himself mentally. Lee Taemin has hopped from dance to choir, and everything is because of him. He stares at his hands angrily before recalling something.
It’s been two choir practices since Taemin first joined. He’s definitely seen Jack Frost, right? “Did you see anyone with silver hair in choir, Taemin?”
“Silver hair? Why would you be looking for-”
“No,” Kibum interjects swiftly, both hands already up in defence. “I was thinking if silver would look nice on real people because I might dye my hair soon.”
“Oh,” Taemin says. “No. But there’s this girl from my year who asked me for my number because she thought I sang well and she wanted me to teach her after classes.” Taemin smiles and Kibum’s jaw drops in horror.
“Taemin,” Kibum half-shouts, knuckles turning white from the amount of force he’s exerting on his poor pencil. “You are so stupid. She wants your d,” he exclaims, arms flailing around to show his point.
By the time Kibum realizes their situation and that they really shouldn’t be doing this in a library, it’s too late. They have about the whole library’s capacity’s worth of eyes staring at them and the librarian strolls over with fire in her eyes.
The both of them get banned from entering the library for the entire semester and are now blacklisted by the librarians.
-
“Dude,” Minho says and raises a brow skeptically when Kibum sets his lunch tray down, “purple Dr. Dre beats.”
“Don’t judge me,” Kibum replies defensively, chucking the earphones into his backpack with a frown, “I have my reasons,” he looks up at Minho and says with a pained expression.
“Welcome to college,” Minho exclaims while stuffing the last bite (it is a huge bite, in Kibum’s defense) of his tuna sandwich into his mouth. Kibum bites back the urge to cry.
-
Kibum gets Jinki, a senior he knows from high school, also the vice president of the student body to plead with the head librarian until she finally concedes and removes the ban from Kibum and Taemin’s heads. The semester isn’t quite yet over, but the semester tests are over, so. He doesn’t really know what unethical methods Jinki resorted to in convincing her, but Jinki is an ethical man, bless him, so Kibum doesn’t really want to know either.
It’s a late night in April when Kibum sneaks out of the doom with a hot bowl of instant ramyun in his hands and sneaks into the empty library through the unlocked doors. It must be lady luck shining down on him because the librarian, whoever it was, forgot to lock the doors properly, and it just had to happen in the week where Kibum forgot to bring his laptop back to school from home after the weekend spent at home.
He’s halfway through yet another rerun of Rise of the Guardians on a shitty movie streaming website on one of the computers in the library and half the bowl of ramyun is already gone before he hears the door swinging open. He’s halfway done with trying to hide his bowl of ramyun under his hoodie but the lights flicker on and the bowl is warm on his crotch.
Kibum’s crotch is burning when he realizes the unlucky librarian who forgot to lock up the doors is Jack Frost. He can’t find the energy to move his hands.
“Rise of the Guardians? With kimchi ramyun?” He asks, and Kibum basks in the pleasant that is his voice, managing a nod.
“Damn, I can’t give this a miss, can I? C'mon, scoot over. Where is the film at right now?”
By the end of the film, Kibum learns that Jack Frost is actually called Kim Jonghyun, he’s a year older than Kibum is and his hair was really inspired by Jack Frost. He can sing, he’s both soprano and alto and bass and everything nice and he knows both Taemin and Jinki. Kibum also thinks he’s pretty much perfect when Jonghyun calls him a “new friend” with this huge grin on his face.
-
“Jinki,” Kibum says sadly over his bento set, chopsticks jabbing hard at soft, steamed rice. “Jinki, I think I am in love with Jack Frost.”
“What’s a Jack Frost?” Jinki replies, and Jonghyun walks past their table with a cordial wave and a smile (a smile! Kibum receives a smile!) at both Jinki and Kibum.
“Never mind,” Kibum says, and sighs in bliss as he watches Jonghyun strut out of the cafeteria.
-
a/n: this did not just happen.
real a/n: i wrote this from 12am to 1am. after 2.5 years of absence in the shinee ficdom, i return (just this once) to present you with sheer attempted crack. guys. i tried.
inspired by jonghyun's hair and my muse for cooking up a plot on How Dense Minho Would Be In School while i was in the shower. cries i still remember when i was such a greenhorn writing shinee as sohye-x3ctmh, but i am so over that phase. this had been a refreshing break from my constant exo turmoil and i missed writing key, so there. ♥