I hate Good-byes
Wow, I only have 2 more days with Nezar, then he's gone. I was upset the first time he left, but I knew he would come back, but for some reason, I am really scared this time. What am I going to do without him here all summer? Every time I want to go out, I call him, he's my best friend. And we wait up for each other to get home every night to talk about our nights. I love him so much and I just wish there was something I could do to make it so he didn't have to go. He has the biggest heart of anyone I know, and he doesn't need to go to Iraq. Plus, he already served his time over there. I guess it's just getting real now that it's getting so close for him to go. For his last weekend here, the army took him away to Des Moines to camp out and practice shooting and doing the gas chamber and stuff. That's BS! It was his last weekend to be home for 18 months and the damn army takes him away. He gets back tonight (Sunday night) then leaves Wednesday morning. But I don't know how much time I will get to spend with him because Tuesday we're all going to the bar for him and so the only night I really have is Monday and I'm sure his boys are going to want to take him out. I'm so scared! He's scared, and for Nezar to admit he's scared....that's a big deal...he's macho man that isn't scared of anything. Why does he have to go, why not some bad peope that are in prison for doing bad things? This sucks so bad. I know it sounds selfish, but he hasn't been here for my birthday in 2 years and if he isn't back for my 21st, we're going to Iraq...anyone with me? I love him and I'm scared! I guess all I can do is pray that he will be ok and keep telling myself he will come home. I don't think that boy knows how much he means to me either. Well if anyone wants to meet him, you all are more than welcome to come to the bar with us Tuesday...I'll probably need some support anyways. Just call me if you want to go.