Stuff
So i finally gained up the courage to talk to my ex about the things that bothered me. Ok... well... he kinda asked what was wrong when he said something and i got mad about it. He asked me why i reacted the way i did and i said that there were alot of things going on in my life right now and that one of them had to deal with him and my emotional state when thinking about our 4 and a half years together. When i told him he didnt believe what i was saying but when he realized that i was being truthful he was extrememly apologetic. I think that is the most sincere he has been towards me since i dont know when. It felt good to say it but i felt stupid walking into meijers on the phone with tears down my face. MOVING ON....
Ive grown much closer to liz over this semester and i think that its done well for me. We have about the same thought patterns and we go through MUCH of the same things. Its like shes my other half when talking about Jamie or boyfriends and emotions and feelings. She is one of the very few people that i can talk to and totally relate with. I mean i love all of my girlfriends, i really really do but liz is the only one that i know i can talk to about being in a serious relationship. my other friends dont have serious, longterm relationships and thats totally fine and there is nothing wrong with it but when you know someone that knows what you are talking about you will automatically go to that person and carry on a convo about it without wondering if they actually understand what you are saying. Its been wonderful having a friend like that at school since my other two are back home. And its also been great knowing that she can come to me with things and her life and know that i know what shes going through or can be there for support and i love that she knows that i really do care. I think alot too has been because i feel like im someone else lately and i feel so withdrawn from life around me because i am so involved in school and studying and the things i have to have accomplish that lately i feel like im neglecting my friends and my social time. I know that i havnt been around and i know that i havnt had time and even though i had so much to study for last thursday night, i was soooooo happy that liz came over to talk for a while. Although it was a thirsty thursday night and she was going to drink she actually came over to see me which was WONDERFUL. Just that little visit from a friend was all i needed. Im sick of living alone and without jamie or without my friends like in the dorms but at the same time i know that it is SOOO good for me to be where i am and by myself.
Life sucks.People suck.School Sucks.BUT with all the suck i love my friends, family and my significant other.
Time for more "EXCITING" papers and studying before bed.
GreaT!!!
Tootles
Ive grown much closer to liz over this semester and i think that its done well for me. We have about the same thought patterns and we go through MUCH of the same things. Its like shes my other half when talking about Jamie or boyfriends and emotions and feelings. She is one of the very few people that i can talk to and totally relate with. I mean i love all of my girlfriends, i really really do but liz is the only one that i know i can talk to about being in a serious relationship. my other friends dont have serious, longterm relationships and thats totally fine and there is nothing wrong with it but when you know someone that knows what you are talking about you will automatically go to that person and carry on a convo about it without wondering if they actually understand what you are saying. Its been wonderful having a friend like that at school since my other two are back home. And its also been great knowing that she can come to me with things and her life and know that i know what shes going through or can be there for support and i love that she knows that i really do care. I think alot too has been because i feel like im someone else lately and i feel so withdrawn from life around me because i am so involved in school and studying and the things i have to have accomplish that lately i feel like im neglecting my friends and my social time. I know that i havnt been around and i know that i havnt had time and even though i had so much to study for last thursday night, i was soooooo happy that liz came over to talk for a while. Although it was a thirsty thursday night and she was going to drink she actually came over to see me which was WONDERFUL. Just that little visit from a friend was all i needed. Im sick of living alone and without jamie or without my friends like in the dorms but at the same time i know that it is SOOO good for me to be where i am and by myself.
Life sucks.People suck.School Sucks.BUT with all the suck i love my friends, family and my significant other.
Time for more "EXCITING" papers and studying before bed.
GreaT!!!
Tootles