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it's been a little while since i have written, although the only person reading this is my little sis (not that that's a bad thing). to update: lexi, kat, and cam are all back from school for the xmas season. last saturday the chicas and i did the gingerbread house thing and that was enough gingerbread fun to last me a couple of years...not a tidy project. this week will be over on thursday for me since ashley and i are driving to ohio that night to do the boon-docks christmas with his relatives. at work, due to some jolly holiday firings that recently took place, i am filling in at the low-key lake forest office and loving the change of pace. and a couple of days after the new year the whole rau clan, myself included even though i had enough backbone to keep my bio-dad's last name, are going to sunny little st george, utah to visit grandma and other relatives. that should actually be fun. i haven't been to that state since i was married. spooky. speaking of exes, my high school boyfriend resurfaced (again) a few nights ago. my phone rang while ash and i were watching the bears game and in a moment of extreme weakness i answered a call from a number i didn't recognize. apparently mike has re-joined the marines and will be deployed to iraq for the entirety of 2006...oh, and p.s...he never got over me. gee, thanks for letting me know that while my current boyfriend stares me down trying to figure out who i'm talking to. the funny thing is, for like 6 years i would have given my right arm to hear those words and now they're actually a little pitiful. you see, the real reason behind the johnny g break-up is...wait, KAITLIN THIS IS CLASSIFIED INFORMATION...anyway the real reason is that i found mike in fall 2003 after years of wondering about him. i spent hours on the phone with him, racking up a $500.00 phone bill, which i ashamedly talked mike into paying, and subsequently broke up with john thinking i was meant to be with mike all along. guess what: the grass is not always greener. sadly, mike was exactly the same guy i had known in high school, but with a crapload of emotional baggage from his time in iraq. so we're talking about a 26 year old with the mentality of a deranged 18 year old who had unexplained crying jags, drove drunk quite frequently, and literally slept with a gun under his pillow. i'm not heartless, i definitely felt sorry for the guy, but i wasn't going to settle for that life. no freaking way. turns out i made a good choice because his explanation for re-enlisting is that he has "issues" that need to be cleared up and he feels that this time he will return from iraq with a clean slate. all i can say is thank god i met ashley. he can be a selfish ass, but that's just because he's an only child. at least he's funny and not a huge loser. i'm not ashamed to say that i could never be a poor man's wife again. you may turn up your nose, kat, but take my advice: once you're out of college, don't even entertain the thought of dating a man without a degree and excellent prospects. you might think it doesn't matter, but look around at all the material wealth to which you have become attached. you won't want to give it up.