The TRUTH
I’m gonna set this straight, Akazawa~
Last weekend, my father took me and my brother camping because he obviously has nothing better to do, and yeah, he’s probably mid-life-crisising like Akazawas father.
Anyway, we set up camp on the side of some random mountain, and Akazawas family copied us. His dad went to Hyoutei with mine, and apparently they were buddies or something. Whatever. Then our highly responsible fathers and brothers drank themselves stupid. Then Akazawa suggested we explore the wood around the camp, and I agreed, because I decided anything was better than staying THERE. Besides, Akazawa kept eyeing the alcohol, so I thought it best to, y’know, remove him from the path of temptation, like his nun-people would want. So we went into the woods. And yeah, we got lost. There was something rustling in the bushes, Akazawa totally flipped, screaming about bears and hyenas. So he ran, and I followed. Then, The branch he’d pushed out of the way swung back and hit me in the face, and I couldn’t see because my eyes were watering so badly D:< Bakazawa had sense enough to guide me though.
And he BIT me. I cant remember why, but that’s not the point. Point is, St Rudolph are cannibals
So we found this cave, and decided we’d camp there for the night seeing as it was getting dark and all. Fine, I had no problem with that. In fact, it was quite relaxing when Akazawa came sprinting back out of the cave flapping his arms and screaming something about bats in his hair. After he calmed down, we gathered leaves for bedding, and decided that, logically, sleeping side by side would provide extra warmth and heighten our chances of survival, etc. Right, that was all well and good, went to sleep…and woke up when Akazawa grabbed me around my middle and plastered himself against my back. And he kept…rubbing off my ass with his…nevermind…
Then the next morning he woke up and complained that I was the one that rolled onto his arm, and he spent the next hour whining about these little red marks on his arm from my sweater, and about how hungry he was. He demanded I go bring down a deer with something ‘martial artsy’ so I left him at the cave. Found a dead rabbit after just a few minutes walking, cleaned the maggots off and brought it back to his majesty at the cave. Let him skin it and cook it. I didn’t eat any, of course. Just part of my training. So anyway, he started to get really ill, so I left to get my own breakfast before the vomit could ruin my appetite.
Then, some hippy tree-hugger type people showed up, Green Trees, or Earth Peace or something. Anyway, we thought they’d help us, but no, they were all “wth, you’ve just killed an extremely rare lapinus delphinus abacus" or something. So I tried to explain that no, I didn’t kill it, the rabbit had been dead when I found it, but I don’t think she could hear me over the sound of Akazawas vomiting, because she was getting all indignant on me. Then, I accidentally….hit her in the face, so we ran for it, before we had a lawsuit on our hands.
Found our family again, they hadn’t even realised we were missing. I don’t think they remembered bringing us, my father was adamant that it was 1989 and he was in the Australian outback…
It was…an experience. Akazawa’s a lot less…annoying than I first thought. I think we benefited from it.
No other real news. Saw Transformers for about the ninetieth time with a friend. My parents are going away for a few days, and my aniki is bringing his girlfriend to stay while they’re away. He’s told me I have to cook dinner everyday or he’ll ‘tell everyone the truth’. I have no idea what he’s talking about, but I think its best not to test him. Here goes my life.
Last weekend, my father took me and my brother camping because he obviously has nothing better to do, and yeah, he’s probably mid-life-crisising like Akazawas father.
Anyway, we set up camp on the side of some random mountain, and Akazawas family copied us. His dad went to Hyoutei with mine, and apparently they were buddies or something. Whatever. Then our highly responsible fathers and brothers drank themselves stupid. Then Akazawa suggested we explore the wood around the camp, and I agreed, because I decided anything was better than staying THERE. Besides, Akazawa kept eyeing the alcohol, so I thought it best to, y’know, remove him from the path of temptation, like his nun-people would want. So we went into the woods. And yeah, we got lost. There was something rustling in the bushes, Akazawa totally flipped, screaming about bears and hyenas. So he ran, and I followed. Then, The branch he’d pushed out of the way swung back and hit me in the face, and I couldn’t see because my eyes were watering so badly D:< Bakazawa had sense enough to guide me though.
And he BIT me. I cant remember why, but that’s not the point. Point is, St Rudolph are cannibals
So we found this cave, and decided we’d camp there for the night seeing as it was getting dark and all. Fine, I had no problem with that. In fact, it was quite relaxing when Akazawa came sprinting back out of the cave flapping his arms and screaming something about bats in his hair. After he calmed down, we gathered leaves for bedding, and decided that, logically, sleeping side by side would provide extra warmth and heighten our chances of survival, etc. Right, that was all well and good, went to sleep…and woke up when Akazawa grabbed me around my middle and plastered himself against my back. And he kept…rubbing off my ass with his…nevermind…
Then the next morning he woke up and complained that I was the one that rolled onto his arm, and he spent the next hour whining about these little red marks on his arm from my sweater, and about how hungry he was. He demanded I go bring down a deer with something ‘martial artsy’ so I left him at the cave. Found a dead rabbit after just a few minutes walking, cleaned the maggots off and brought it back to his majesty at the cave. Let him skin it and cook it. I didn’t eat any, of course. Just part of my training. So anyway, he started to get really ill, so I left to get my own breakfast before the vomit could ruin my appetite.
Then, some hippy tree-hugger type people showed up, Green Trees, or Earth Peace or something. Anyway, we thought they’d help us, but no, they were all “wth, you’ve just killed an extremely rare lapinus delphinus abacus" or something. So I tried to explain that no, I didn’t kill it, the rabbit had been dead when I found it, but I don’t think she could hear me over the sound of Akazawas vomiting, because she was getting all indignant on me. Then, I accidentally….hit her in the face, so we ran for it, before we had a lawsuit on our hands.
Found our family again, they hadn’t even realised we were missing. I don’t think they remembered bringing us, my father was adamant that it was 1989 and he was in the Australian outback…
It was…an experience. Akazawa’s a lot less…annoying than I first thought. I think we benefited from it.
No other real news. Saw Transformers for about the ninetieth time with a friend. My parents are going away for a few days, and my aniki is bringing his girlfriend to stay while they’re away. He’s told me I have to cook dinner everyday or he’ll ‘tell everyone the truth’. I have no idea what he’s talking about, but I think its best not to test him. Here goes my life.